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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Socrates" data-source="post: 851460" data-attributes="member: 11651">LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Welcome back ladies and gentlemen.  We are now bringing you live and up-to-date coverage of team PHS (that's Putrid Humanoid Scum) and their adventures in the Hellmouth.  So, what's on tap for today?Well, we've got one minor skirmish, one major fight, and what looks like it might possibly be a TPK.  Definitely not something that anyone will want to miss.  But first a word from our sponsor.___________________________________________________Are you tired after a long day of scouting the hellmouth?  Do you find yourself constantly looking for food and water?  Do you consistently get attacked while you're sleeping?  Are you fed up with endless watch rotations?  Well my friend, I have a solution for your problems.  Try one of our new, Ever-ready Rings of Sustenance.  Never worry about food or drink again.  Sleep for only 2 hours each day.  That's right, only 2 hours each day.  Let the other chumps worry about getting attacked while sleeping - you can rest in fully vigilant comfort.  So pick one up today, and be the envy of all of your fellow-party members.Ever-Ready is not responsible for any attacks that occur during the two hours your are actually sleeping. ___________________________________________________OK folks, we're back, and just to whet your appetite, we have a little bit of grisly mutilation.  That's right, what you see is team PHS actually cutting the head off of the bugbear ion the torture chamber.  I've seen brutality before, but why cut the head off of this dead bugbear.Um, I guess that would be to foil speak with dead, right?Great point.  No talking to that bugbear corpse now.  I'm sure that whenever team Evil Genius encounters PHS, they will be completely in the dark about what PHS can do. . .Well, it looks like they found a book - all kinds of good stuff in there about gambols and rakshasa (back in sanctuary), a gnarl being torutred in the hellmouth, and a vapor boar being tortured in the Hellmouth in a lab created by Aunti Entity - who appears to be in charge of this whole operation.  Apparently this vapor boar seems to be the most important of the torture victims, since it is giving them the power to lay the charm on so many people.  Enough with the book and reading.  I'm sure it's very interesting to our viewers to watch a xvart try to read, but can we get to a little bit of action.So, it's action you want?  OK, how about that minor skirmish I was telling you about?  See wee have team PHS heading back to a hiding place in the hellmouth, with that dark smudge scouting out in front.  Oh boy, did you see that?  The dark smudge stopped moving, but the rest of the group seems to keep going forward.  Something must have happened to it, and the rest of team PHS doesn't realize it yet.  Things might get ugly in a hurry here. . .Oh wait, Rhuun is down too.  She seems to just be staring into space with no will to do anything.  Two down, 5 to go, and I don't think they even realize that there is a threat. . .Atarax blows his horn of goodness, so they must realize something is up, but it doesn't seem to help rhuun.  Thar tries to dispel magic on rhuun and that doesn't seem to wrok either.  The rest of the folks are moving up, but they can't even see their enemies yet.  Looks like Ib and Thar are getting targeted by whatever this power is - with no effect.  Moroku drops a minor globe, Atarax begins to inspire greatness in Ib, and Thar gets the inflict critical ready and moves forward.  Ib and thar get targeted again, and this time Ib goes down.  No more movement coming from Ib.  With 3 party members down, and no enemies in sight, things are looking bad. . .Foeful moves up and starts summoning reinforcements, moroku sends a fireball down the corridor, and manages to do some damage.  Atarax drops a confusion down there, and it seems like one of them is confused.  Thar charges up and lays the inflict crit on one of them and looks hurt.  One of them stands there and does nothing, while the other one takes a claw/claw/bite on Thar.  Then the summoned wolf appears, charges into the fray and takes a big hunk out of the confused one.  Foeful then throws an ice knife, followed up by the zombie athatch smashing one into bits.  Now it looks like that water elemental dire wolf and the whatever it is are just tearing each other to pieces.Boy, these battles can turn on a copper piece.  I thought team PHS might be in some real trouble here.  Well we've got a major battle coming now, and who knows what might happen.  Let's zip ahead, ah, there we are, Team PHS settling in for a quiet evening of rest in the hellmouth.  I'm sure that they'll be able to sleep with no problems. . .Wait a minute, what's that rumbling noise?  Is that, could it be, yes it is, it's a PURPLE WORM!  That ought to give these guys some trouble.  That bard keeps singing about the time they killed a purple worm, but I can't really believe they did that.  We'll see how they fare when they're live on scry.The dark smudge lets rip with an arrow from sure strike.  Wow - that had to hurt.  Atarax begins to inspire greatness in rhuun, singing about, you guessed it, the last time they killed a purple worm.  Wait a minute, we have out first casualty, it just bit, grabbed, and swallowed Moroku.  I guess we won't be seeing any of those fancy lightning bolts this battle.  Hey what is that nimbus of black energy surrounding Thar?That looks like a slay living!  Bringing out the big guns today!  Too bad that purple worms are pretty tough.  No dice on the whole instant death thing, but it did seem to take another chunk out of it.  Ib charges and misses - surprise!  Have we seen this mongrelman actually hit anything yet?I certainly don't remember it.Rhuun jumps up and takes a gash out of the worm with her shortsword, and wait a minute, what's this?   A lightning bolt just burst out through the side of the purple worm.  IS that orc casting spells after being swallowed?  We might hear some complaints from the WOTC folks about that. . .Foeful finishes summoning his Fire Elemental Dire Ape that moves in for the kill.  Oh wait, the worm attacks the ape and swallows it before it can even take a swiing.  Well at least foeful can hit it with a bolt of conjuring.  The dark smudge shoots it again, and Atarax tries to lay a curse on it - surprise, no effect.  It tries to bite Thar and hit him with its poison stinger - AND MISSES TWICE!  That's gotta hurt the worm's chances here.  It does get to do some crushing damage and acid damage to moroku on the inside though.  Thar lays the inflict crit on it for big damage, and surprise, Ib misses again.  Rhuun finally gets a full attack, and hits it 3 times!  It seems to be teetering now.  ANd here comes the deathblow - a bolt of conjuring from Foeful.  Ain't nothing left now but to cut out Moroku and fish out the posion sac.Don't forget about eating the heart.Oh wait, there we see atarax cutting into the side and pulling out the steaming heart.  Everyone takes a bite.  Nothing like fresh purple worm heart.  Let's take another break from the action while Team PHS settles in for the night</blockquote>

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