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Message: <blockquote data-quote="AFGNCAAP" data-source="post: 1421200" data-attributes="member: 871">Well, from personal experience, I'd have with agree w/ Eric.  For most of my years of gaming experience, it basically boiled down to "game or not game."Mind you, I was at the very least an introvert, or at the most suffering from social anxiety disorder (of which I've only been aware about since the last 3-4 years, & I've been gaming for 14+ years).  I really think that my gaming experiences would be much different if I was aware of my anxiety early on.In addition to this, it's been relatively slim pickings for most of that time, the other gaming group options haven't been appealing overall, & the "core" group I've been with consists mainly of people I've known since high school.However, I haven't gamed for well over 6 months now.  For one, my g/f isn't too keen on gaming with that particular group anymore (tabletop at least--she still participates in a PBeM Marvel game run by one of the typical players/GMs for the old core group).Also, the group itself has been very unstable the past few years--a fair share of personal conflicts have caused a bit of turmoil; plus 1 player will attend somewhat regularly for a while, then drop out for months at a time, then slowly rejoin the group.  Also, a fair amount of turmoil was due to old friendships (friendships that have been around at least since high school) turned sour as people grew up, grew older, & grew apart.A few years ago, we'd invited some new players to fill the void of the aforementioned on-again/off-again player, but those new players were driven away because the on-again/off-again player was on-again w/ the group, he didn't like the new players, & it boiled down to a "me or them" issue (said on-again/off-again player was favored by one of the few remaining core members of the group; also the new players' style of play didn't mesh well with the old members' style of play).  And, one of the regulars (out of the service & back in the group) still maintains his habit of "enhancing" dice rolls (which just gets under my skin--it's not an occasional, once-every-blue-moon sort of thing, but a regular habit).It's not the games that drove me away from gaming--it's a string of lackluster to bad experiences with the group that has.  We've had some new players around for a brief while, but I'm sure we pretty much wound up alienating them (so forming a new group with them instead doesn't seem feasible at all).  And with the old group, despite any efforts to put an interesting twist to a game, or no matter how much background stuff I work on, I still get the feeling of "same old, same old" from the players due to the PCs they make & how they play the game.  Doesn't give me much motivation to run at all (which I have to do at times, sometimes with little advance warning).However, a key factor why I'm still not gaming now is because I'm unemployed--I've been unemployed since mid-January.  I've pretty much resigned to find a job first before I start up gaming again (I've got a house payment & bills to cover--gotta keep my priorities straight).I've also DMed a camapign set in a setting which I could care less for--the Forgotten Realms.  Yet, it's popular with a fair # of the other group members, so I ran it.  Playing Baldur's Gate helped psych me up for it a bit, but the decaying state of the group, & general lack of interest (displayed) by other players during the game pretty much killed any motivation I had to run the game.PBeM gaming isn't my thing--goes way too slow, plus I lose track of actions & reply due dates (esp. when I was working).  I've played a game online recently, & though interesting, it seemed a bit more chaotic than live tabletop gaming has ever been for me.I enjoy gaming.  I miss gaming.  I know I still want to play & run games--heck, I'm still buying resource books & writing up stuff for future games.  Yet, I just don't miss the mess associated with gaming with my regular group.  Right now, not gaming is a necessary choice on my part, but when I do get a job and the choice is no longer necessary, I'm not sure I'm start up again (at least with that group).  I'm sure there's a great gaming group out there, but I sure as heck haven't found them yet. (And, even worse, I'm not too sure they'd accept me in anyways--heh.  Ah well.).Sorry--didn't mean to vent & write a "woe is me" autobiography on my gaming life.  Just trying to contribute my own perspective to the issue.</blockquote>

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