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<blockquote data-quote="CleverNickName" data-source="post: 4312938" data-attributes="member: 50987"><p>But it really doesn't. Take the paragraph that the OP offered, for instance:</p><p></p><p><span style="color: Green">Fun is one element you shouldn’t vary. Every encounter in an adventure should be fun. As much as possible, fast-forward through the parts of an adventure that aren’t fun. An encounter with two guards at the city gate isn’t fun. Tell the players they get through the gate without much trouble and move on to the fun. Niggling details of food supplies and encumbrance usually aren’t fun, so don’t sweat them, and let the players get to the adventure and on to the fun. Long treks through endless corridors in the ancient dwarven stronghold beneath the mountains aren’t fun. Move the PCs quickly from encounter to encounter, and on to the fun!</span></p><p></p><p>Now a paragraph in a technical document (as opposed to a paragraph in a short story or novel) should consist of a unifying main point, followed by supporting details that build on each other to advance the idea, then conclude with a summary that echoes the main point. </p><p></p><p>This paragraph starts with a clear idea ("Fun is one element you shouldn't vary"), but the body of the paragraph does not support that idea...instead, it lists various things that are/are not fun. These are subjective ideals, not facts. There is no summary in conclusion either; the closing statement is a forceful command instead ("Do this," complete with an exclaimation point.)</p><p></p><p>The problem isn't a missing or overused word; the whole paragraph needs to be revised to be more focused, less opinionated, and to the point.</p><p></p><p>Just sayin.'</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="CleverNickName, post: 4312938, member: 50987"] But it really doesn't. Take the paragraph that the OP offered, for instance: [COLOR=Green]Fun is one element you shouldn’t vary. Every encounter in an adventure should be fun. As much as possible, fast-forward through the parts of an adventure that aren’t fun. An encounter with two guards at the city gate isn’t fun. Tell the players they get through the gate without much trouble and move on to the fun. Niggling details of food supplies and encumbrance usually aren’t fun, so don’t sweat them, and let the players get to the adventure and on to the fun. Long treks through endless corridors in the ancient dwarven stronghold beneath the mountains aren’t fun. Move the PCs quickly from encounter to encounter, and on to the fun![/COLOR] Now a paragraph in a technical document (as opposed to a paragraph in a short story or novel) should consist of a unifying main point, followed by supporting details that build on each other to advance the idea, then conclude with a summary that echoes the main point. This paragraph starts with a clear idea ("Fun is one element you shouldn't vary"), but the body of the paragraph does not support that idea...instead, it lists various things that are/are not fun. These are subjective ideals, not facts. There is no summary in conclusion either; the closing statement is a forceful command instead ("Do this," complete with an exclaimation point.) The problem isn't a missing or overused word; the whole paragraph needs to be revised to be more focused, less opinionated, and to the point. Just sayin.' [/QUOTE]
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