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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Mark" data-source="post: 1626626" data-attributes="member: 5">CK - Personally, if I were in your place, I'd be looking for another group with which to game.  However, it sounds as if you'd like to see if your current group can be reined in or enlightened.  To that end I'd offer the following advice.Retire your character and start a new one that is male.  Once you have removed the chance for a player to couch his rude bahavior as part of his character you'll have a better chance to confront the bahavior and squelch it.Firstly, this allows you to determine which of the players understand that the displayed behavior is rude.  The ones that do understand will not be making sexist comments out of character and will also have to confront the persistent players who continue to act rudely out of character.Secondly, this helps you sort out who is actually cognizant of the problem.  Many folks who have learned unsavory bahavior over time are not aware on a conscious level that it is wrong.  There are a myriad of ways that they will rationalize it and it is far easier to confront when it is put under a spotlight with no easy exits.If it hasn't already been handled by the DM then I would have to guess that the DM is either one of the rude people or one of the people that is unaware of how rude the bahavior is and how it is bothering you.  In this case you will need to build a stronger case.  To do this, when a comment is made that fits the parameters you have outlined, call a halt to the game and make the person who made the comment repeat the comment that you find offensive.  Highlight the comment.  Repeat it yourself and ask the person to confirm that this is what they have said.  Disect the comment to remove its tongue in cheek vernacular then ask each person at the table, beginning with the DM, if you are understanding what is being said, if they are understanding what is being said, and if it is considered acceptable behavior at the table to make such comments.  Make it clear that you find it offensive.This is a way to untrain someone from maing offhand comments and to clearly delineate between what is offensive and what is not.  It is difficult to do in a pragmatic way and has to be done quite clinically.  If it is done emotionally it will lose a great deal of its impact and unlikely to do more than agitate.  If done in anger it is likely to reflect as poorly on yourself as on the actual offender.As said above, I wouldn't waste my time and I would find another group.  However, if you think it is worth the struggle, the above is my suggestion on how to confront the situation and affect some change.  Best of luck with whatever you decide to do.</blockquote>

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