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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Gothmog" data-source="post: 2181039" data-attributes="member: 317">Majoru, I can understand where you are coming from.  I am 6'2", and from the time I was 12 until I was 26, I was always very heavy- to the point of being 320 lbs at my heaviest.  I have pale skin (due to genetics), a beard, and long hair which I usually wore in a ponytail.  I took showers every day (thats just a common courtesy to people, whether you like them or not), but I was socially inept, liked geeky things, and spent almost all of my free time on gaming or geeky pursuits.  To top it off, I was working on my PhD in Neuroscience, which is basically a field full of geeks (but interesting geeks).  Around the time I was 26, my knees and back started bothering me due to the excess weight, and I decided to lose weight for myself so I wouldn't feel like crap when I was older and I'd have a longer, happier, healther life.So I started walking then jogging 4 miles a day, watching what I ate, and being more active.  I had a lot more energy, and within 10 months, I had dropped down to 190 lbs (which for me is skin and bones).  I started doing intensive weight training, and within 3 years, I had worked my way back up to 250 lbs of muscle.  It takes a lot of effort, and yeah, I didn't spend as much time gaming.  But looking back, I think I was crazy for not doing this sooner.  I feel SO MUCH better now, physically, emotionally, and socially, and I have much more confidence.  I'm just as much "me" now as I was before I changed my life, but life is better now.  From personal experience, women don't like fat, geeky, and especially unconfident guys- and that last one will drive them away from you screaming, especially if you act needy.  Also, cultivate more varied interests- I took up golf, weightlifting, hiking, concerts, etc- it makes you a more interesting person and gives you more common ground and ability to relate to people.Now, I'm enjoying life and everything I've accomplished, and I'm really looking forward to the future.  I've got my PhD, I am a professor at one of the top 20 private colleges in the country, in the best shape of my life (my students call me "Conan" or say I look like Triple H now), I'm more confident, have a better mental outlook, and still find time to play games several times a month (not every week like before since real life has intruded and friends have moved away for jobs).  I'm not married and don't have a girlfriend right now, but thats more because I'm not looking for one right now while I get my career established and life set up.  I've noticed a big difference in how women treat me too- random women will stop and start talking to me, and women in my classes or that I know at school hang around my office just to chat.  And I'm up front and honest about my geeky habits (gaming, computer games, minis painting, etc), and if doesn't bother you to talk about it, I've found most women will say "hmm, sounds kinda interesting- can you show me sometime?".  I can really understand where you are coming from, and why you feel that way, but you're the one with the responsibility and ability to improve your life- its not owed to you, and nobody else has an obligation to make sure you're happy other than YOU.And listen to Teflon Billy- he has great wisdom, even if he can be "overzealous" at times.  He's kinda like Bhudda with a baseball bat.  <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f60e.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":cool:" title="Cool    :cool:"  data-smilie="6"data-shortname=":cool:" /></blockquote>

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