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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Merkuri" data-source="post: 5370101" data-attributes="member: 41321">To the OP: You really need to find out if this is a big deal for her.  Don't shy away from the subject because it makes you uncomfortable, because issues like this are things you need to work out before you get married, not after.This reminds me of conversations I used to have with one of my ex-boyfriends.  We both had things that we deeply wanted to change in our partner.  I won't mention specifics because they were mostly differences of political opinions - we were polar opposites when it came to politics.  But I kept hoping I could change him and he kept hoping he could change me, and eventually I realized this was not going to work and I broke it off.If it were just a passing comment due to her not understanding how much you enjoy games and how much of a childish thing they are not then it might not be a big deal.But if she is really and truly waiting for you to "grow up" and give up that stuff and it is something that will grate on her as you get older and continue to game then you need to realize that this is not a sustainable relationship.As far as why RPG games aren't childish, they exercise your brain, improve your creativity, help you socialize.  Some RPGs can be very mature in nature, depending on the wants of the players.Computer or video games help your hand-eye coordination (there was some article I read a long time ago about how surgeons who play computer games end up making fewer mistakes on the operating table) and exercise your puzzle-solving or decision-making skills.And both of them are just hobbies.  They're no different than poker night, watching TV shows, model building, putting together puzzles, knitting, collecting penguin sculptures, etc.Looking over at my husband's computer desk, I see that he's got toys scattered all over it.  I mean real toys, like transformers, a jar of putty, a poseable viking figure, etc.  I bought him half of the things up there.  I get him a transformer of some sort each year for Christmas.  He does not actually play with them (at least, not when I'm looking), but he gets joy out of having them, and I like being able to contribute to that silliness.  Growing up is overrated.</blockquote>

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