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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Rassilon" data-source="post: 5372632" data-attributes="member: 15065">Rambling advice from the futureWell OP, I've taken a couple of days to read through this whole thread, and having done so, and seen recommendations ranging from 'dump your future intended' to 'maybe she'll like to RP if given the chance' (maybe she will, I don't know) I don't feel qualified to give *you personally* any advice. Real advice I mean, for a real issue, not easy internet advice. A lot of people here are saying some very sensible things, though.So I'm going to go back in time and give my 21 year old self some advice, because I can relate to him, and if you can get anything out of it that's great:"Rassilon, thanks for coming by. I just wanted to say that you have absolutely no idea the changes that are coming in the next 10 and 20 years. There is something called growing up, and compared the freedoms, and frankly restricted horizons coupled with the sense of infinite possibility that you enjoy now, it might seem pretty sucky. The details don't matter, whether are work, mortgage, kids, the growing realisation that average people have average lives, or all of them. This 'growing up' adds all sorts of barriers and challenges to other things - like boozing with mates, or swimming every day, or throwing some dice - that you might otherwise want to be doing. But this isn't the whole story:Part of this mysterious process involves what you want changing. I know, I know, it doesn't seem likely, but trust me on this. Maybe it will be working some extra hours to get that nice house, maybe the endless hours of care and attention that kids will require, but at some point you are going to deliberately, not all at once, but deliberately choose to do things that mean that there is a LOT less time for casual / fun activities. And you will, I think, be happy with those choices. But fun things are, after all, still fun. And all duty makes for (so I'm told) boring booty. The trick then will be to schedule those fun activities, so that they do happen. And the trick then is to have picked a longterm partner, and be the kind of longterm partner, who works hard and willingly to ensure you both get time together, and time to nourish your own souls doing your own things - doesn't matter if it's RPG or something else - amongst all the rest of a busy and demanding life.How you go about choosing that person, and being that person, I'd say that's individual enough that even I, future Rassilon, can't advise you. That or I just want to avoid spoilers."[Advice to past self ends]And back in the present, I'd just like to say that the advice works, and to apologise for those irregular tremors that shake the planet. Those are caused by my completely non-gamer wife literally shifting the earth to make sure I get to RP sometimes.-Rassilon</blockquote>

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