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Giant-slayer Follies (Humor)
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<blockquote data-quote="Savage Wombat" data-source="post: 906230" data-attributes="member: 1932"><p>OK, let's see if you find this as funny as we did.</p><p></p><p>The party for whom I DM is fighting a group of Aztec Hunter Giants (based off one of the giants in the MM2). The sorcerer in the party catches one off guard with Hold Monster and drops it to the jungle floor.</p><p></p><p>On his next action, he heads over to the beast to Coup de Grace it. He is accompanied by the party's guide dog, Virgil. The rest of the party is finishing off the other remaining giants.</p><p></p><p>The sorcerer gets up to the monster with his dagger, and on his next action, performs the CdG. He rolls a hit (I require one, but the target is at Dex 0 of course) and then determines his critical damage.</p><p></p><p>A whopping 2d4 damage - and he rolls two 1s. The giant loses two of his 137 HP, and gets to make a DC 12 Fort save. Gee, will he make it?</p><p></p><p>The sorcerer finishes sawing at the giant's thick skin, and decides to bash it's brain in with his quarterstaff instead. Meanwhile, Virgil attempts to rip out the beasts jugular. Slightly higher damage - 2d4+2 - but again, two 1s. DC 14 Fort save. Yawn.</p><p></p><p>By this time, the rest of the party is done fighting. Two of the party rogues wander over and begin making helpful comments.</p><p></p><p>The sorcerer tries again, with the staff - and rolls a whopping 5 points of damage this time. DC 15 is still easy.</p><p></p><p>At this point, the rogues get tired of waiting and decide to show how it's done. One whips out his rapier, and runs it into the giant's ear. Critical and sneak attack damage combine to provide 22 points of damage straight to the creature's brain - surely this will kill the beast?</p><p></p><p>No, as it turns out - a natural 20 is enough for the giant to make that particular DC 32 save. Laughter from the party and looks of disbelief, not to mention my "Blue's Clues" joke.</p><p></p><p>The other rogue leaps forward and tries to rip out the giant's throat with his teeth. (Don't ask.) Remember that "to-hit" roll? Well, he rolls a 1. Turns out the giant had a metal necklace on. The rogue clutches his face in pain. The laughter is getting worse.</p><p></p><p>Another couple of blows from the sorcerer and the dog - neither sufficient to do the giant in. Then the first rogue tries again, basically "stirring" the giant's brains with his rapier - another 21 points of damage, and (drum roll) another 20 for a save! Giant's down to about half hit points, and it's beginning to look like they'll have to hack it to death.</p><p></p><p>Fortunately, the other rogue rips off the giant's necklace and makes his next to-hit roll, for a nice thirty-some points of damage, more than enough to outclass the giant's Fort save.</p><p></p><p>I think the attempts to kill one helpless monster will remain one of the fondest memories of this campaign - at least from the laughs involved.</p><p></p><p>--- Savage Wombat</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Savage Wombat, post: 906230, member: 1932"] OK, let's see if you find this as funny as we did. The party for whom I DM is fighting a group of Aztec Hunter Giants (based off one of the giants in the MM2). The sorcerer in the party catches one off guard with Hold Monster and drops it to the jungle floor. On his next action, he heads over to the beast to Coup de Grace it. He is accompanied by the party's guide dog, Virgil. The rest of the party is finishing off the other remaining giants. The sorcerer gets up to the monster with his dagger, and on his next action, performs the CdG. He rolls a hit (I require one, but the target is at Dex 0 of course) and then determines his critical damage. A whopping 2d4 damage - and he rolls two 1s. The giant loses two of his 137 HP, and gets to make a DC 12 Fort save. Gee, will he make it? The sorcerer finishes sawing at the giant's thick skin, and decides to bash it's brain in with his quarterstaff instead. Meanwhile, Virgil attempts to rip out the beasts jugular. Slightly higher damage - 2d4+2 - but again, two 1s. DC 14 Fort save. Yawn. By this time, the rest of the party is done fighting. Two of the party rogues wander over and begin making helpful comments. The sorcerer tries again, with the staff - and rolls a whopping 5 points of damage this time. DC 15 is still easy. At this point, the rogues get tired of waiting and decide to show how it's done. One whips out his rapier, and runs it into the giant's ear. Critical and sneak attack damage combine to provide 22 points of damage straight to the creature's brain - surely this will kill the beast? No, as it turns out - a natural 20 is enough for the giant to make that particular DC 32 save. Laughter from the party and looks of disbelief, not to mention my "Blue's Clues" joke. The other rogue leaps forward and tries to rip out the giant's throat with his teeth. (Don't ask.) Remember that "to-hit" roll? Well, he rolls a 1. Turns out the giant had a metal necklace on. The rogue clutches his face in pain. The laughter is getting worse. Another couple of blows from the sorcerer and the dog - neither sufficient to do the giant in. Then the first rogue tries again, basically "stirring" the giant's brains with his rapier - another 21 points of damage, and (drum roll) another 20 for a save! Giant's down to about half hit points, and it's beginning to look like they'll have to hack it to death. Fortunately, the other rogue rips off the giant's necklace and makes his next to-hit roll, for a nice thirty-some points of damage, more than enough to outclass the giant's Fort save. I think the attempts to kill one helpless monster will remain one of the fondest memories of this campaign - at least from the laughs involved. --- Savage Wombat [/QUOTE]
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