Hallmark Cards for Adventurers

[mythusmage]

Take a look at page 31 of the Wotc Contest Thread for the background to this post.

This consists of sentiments you might find on Hallmark cards intended for adventurers. With no further ado...

Sympathies on your most recent demise.

Now that you're a deity.

So now you're a frog.

A birthday wish for a half-orc son.

On your 300th wedding anniversary.

To my favorite great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandson.

Things to do when you're a lich.
-----
What can you come up with?

 

[Hand of Evil]

To the Paladin that has fallen

Just to say hello, you are my best fiend

Get well soon, visit a cleric

So your sword is more inteligent than you

Surprise Backstab...No, you are now OLD!

For the wizard that has everything...BOOM (exploding rune)

Kill the orc, Kill the Villian, kill the demon...have a good day.

 

[Krug]

Heard you're now a Prestige Class.

Sympathies for your most recent reincarnation.

 

[Henry]

Congratulations, Graduate of the Wizard's College!

So you've lost a familiar

Congratulations to the Vampire on the birth of your Spawn

Hot naked women inside! (Picture of a nymph or a medusa inside)

I'm sorry I triggered that trap

For the Evil Overlord who has everything

I think you're special! (For the recipient of a feeblemind spell)

And finally...

The Hallmark-branded sack (for sending someone money)

 

[alsih2o]

a special thank you
a special thank you
a special thank you
a special thank you
a special thank you
(dang i am tired of these cards every time the party cleric has to heal me)

 

[Angelsboi]

these are great!!