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<blockquote data-quote="Dannyalcatraz" data-source="post: 7574159" data-attributes="member: 19675"><p>Not really. While his Mom is out of town for a week visiting his half-brothers & grandchildren, he’s at her house taking care of the pets and housesitting. All I know is his schedule...”ish”. Don’t know if he’s done any of the chores he should be doing that were previously undone- a partial precipitator to the whole kerfuffle.</p><p></p><p>The thing is, he is <strong>24</strong>. He isn’t the most mature person his age, but he IS an adult. There’s only so many times you can tell someone- especially adults- to do something before you sound like a nag, whether they’ve done the task or not. And Mom and I <em>both</em> talked to him about the chores before he went back over there. Telling him again is more likely to be counterproductive.</p><p></p><p>Plus, after having him around here for a few weeks, we’ve gotten a good taste of some of the other contributing factors. He’s basically spending every spare moment hanging with his friends. He’s in 3 different RPG campaigns right now, and sometimes he doesn’t get home until after 1AM.* It doesn’t interfere with his job because he usually works the closing shift, so that’s all good. Supposedly, they’re considering cross-training him for a manage position. </p><p></p><p>But if he oversleeps in the morning, he doesn’t get the trash or recycling out in time to be picked up. If he’s dragging from yet another late-night session, leaves don’t get raked. The lawn doesn’t get mowed. And sometimes- both at his Mom’s and in our house- late night returns can set the pets to making noise. That’s not good for those who DO work in the mornings.</p><p></p><p>Don’t get me wrong, his Mom overreacted <em>horribly</em> to him missing a trash day (or whatever it was). But we can’t keep shielding him from the consequences of his actions/inactions. He has ADHD, not autism or something more serious. There is no excuse.</p><p></p><p>Now, to his credit, he IS concerned about being a burden. When things were OK with his Mom, he paid her some “rent”. At our house, he’s told my folks he doesn’t want to eat too much of our food, so he eats out a lot at local fast food places. Of course, that still means he’s misreading the concerns of those around him. His money helps his Mom, but doing the chores helps much more. And food is almost always present in our house in amounts INTENDED for sharing- his eating it is a non-issue.</p><p></p><p></p><p>* I was young once, and did my fair share of carousing, both gaming related and other. Hell, I still do. But I have a key to the house, and I don’t bestir the dogs because I come through the garage, not the front door.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Dannyalcatraz, post: 7574159, member: 19675"] Not really. While his Mom is out of town for a week visiting his half-brothers & grandchildren, he’s at her house taking care of the pets and housesitting. All I know is his schedule...”ish”. Don’t know if he’s done any of the chores he should be doing that were previously undone- a partial precipitator to the whole kerfuffle. The thing is, he is [B]24[/B]. He isn’t the most mature person his age, but he IS an adult. There’s only so many times you can tell someone- especially adults- to do something before you sound like a nag, whether they’ve done the task or not. And Mom and I [I]both[/I] talked to him about the chores before he went back over there. Telling him again is more likely to be counterproductive. Plus, after having him around here for a few weeks, we’ve gotten a good taste of some of the other contributing factors. He’s basically spending every spare moment hanging with his friends. He’s in 3 different RPG campaigns right now, and sometimes he doesn’t get home until after 1AM.* It doesn’t interfere with his job because he usually works the closing shift, so that’s all good. Supposedly, they’re considering cross-training him for a manage position. But if he oversleeps in the morning, he doesn’t get the trash or recycling out in time to be picked up. If he’s dragging from yet another late-night session, leaves don’t get raked. The lawn doesn’t get mowed. And sometimes- both at his Mom’s and in our house- late night returns can set the pets to making noise. That’s not good for those who DO work in the mornings. Don’t get me wrong, his Mom overreacted [I]horribly[/I] to him missing a trash day (or whatever it was). But we can’t keep shielding him from the consequences of his actions/inactions. He has ADHD, not autism or something more serious. There is no excuse. Now, to his credit, he IS concerned about being a burden. When things were OK with his Mom, he paid her some “rent”. At our house, he’s told my folks he doesn’t want to eat too much of our food, so he eats out a lot at local fast food places. Of course, that still means he’s misreading the concerns of those around him. His money helps his Mom, but doing the chores helps much more. And food is almost always present in our house in amounts INTENDED for sharing- his eating it is a non-issue. * I was young once, and did my fair share of carousing, both gaming related and other. Hell, I still do. But I have a key to the house, and I don’t bestir the dogs because I come through the garage, not the front door. [/QUOTE]
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