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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Yaguara" data-source="post: 6061315" data-attributes="member: 6703721">For the OP - remember this is a game, specifically it is a social game where you gather together with others for mutual enjoyment.  If you are not enjoying yourself - why are you doing it?  Now, I don't know your situation or the personalities involved - I can only comment from the perspective of what I would do.  The first question that came to me when I read the original post is what are the other people doing?  How do they react to this "jerk" behavior?  Are they ignoring it because he is not doing it to them?  Do they enjoy that kind of behavior?  What is the GM doing to control the game?  Perhaps it is my background but I see a large part of the GM's job is to make sure everyone at the table is enjoying themselves.  If there is one individual who is interfering with everyone else's enjoyment then I (as the GM) have an obligation to do something about it.  Likewise, if there is one person who is not having fun I also have an obligation to do something about it - without interfering with everyone else's enjoyment obviously.Confrontation is not the first choice tool for this discussion but it is a tool in the shed.  You can always escalate to a confrontation down the road if it becomes needed but you can't start with a confrontation and go backwards.  I do not have the patience of Job but I do understand that there is always at least 2 sides to a confict and you can't resolve anything until you understand both of them.  However, if it does come to a confrontation then (again as GM) it is my responsability to have that confrontation.I am not sure that I would counsel the "wait and see" approach.  The problem with that path is that it gives an easy way to discount your position and make it weaker.  If it doesn't work and you finally say something the immediate response is, "You've been playing for (insert time frame here) and you never had a problem before."  Now you are placed on the defensive and will have to justify your behavior instead of the other way around.  My counsel would be to gather your intelligence - find out what is going on in the heads of the other people in the group.  If they do not see his behavior as a problem then that means that you are the one with the problem and the group dynamic will exclude you one way or another so it is best to dissasociate from the group in that setting.  That doesn't mean that you stop being friends with these people - it just means that you don't game with them and you do something else instead.  On the other hand, if you are not alone in your perception that his behavior is a problem then you should proceed with the conversation with your "jerk" friend - preferably in the conflict-resolution method discussed above.</blockquote>

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