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Message: <blockquote data-quote="orchid blossom" data-source="post: 2819556" data-attributes="member: 12815">When Minerva steps out of the room and Ruby hurries over to Jake. "What should we do with all the money? I wasn't sure the Priestess would think it right we took it but I was going to find a way anyway." Jake opens one of the large pockets on his duster and grins.  "We can worry about proper wealth redistribution later."Ruby takes a large handful of money and sticks it in Jake's pocket. She does that with all the money and stock certificates, finding a nice warm home for all of them. Finally she looks up at Jake and smiles, a hint of her normal twinkle in her eyes. "It looks like Mr. Jacobs IS buying the drinks tonight.  What recordings were you talking about?”"I thought someone said there was one of those Edison Phonothingies.  They record spoken words or music."  He gets up off the floor and examines the trunk contents and boxes in detail looking for a player and any recordings.There is a case that Minerva had removed from the trunk that is labeled to contain what Jake is looking for.  He undoes the latches and opens the case to reveal a brand new phonograph.  There is a pocket made into the lid of the case that does appear to hold a record. Jake plays the record and a crackly recording of a ballad is heard."Ruby, why don't you see if anything is hidden in this contraption while I look at the other box."  It felt good to say her name.  To call her anything else seemed wrong, he always thought that she should have been born with that name it described her so well.  Realizing that he was momentarily daydreaming he moved quickly to the other box. He examines it carefully.  He tries to read what was last typed on the machine by looking at the plate or making an imprint of any ink on there with paper.Ruby thoroughly searches the phonograph box.  There is nothing magical about it and there are no hidden compartments.  The only thing she finds is a small drawer with a few spare parts. Jake examines the typewriter.  There are a few used sheets of paper as well as some clean ones.  The used sheets seem to have sample letters addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Jones living at 100 Maple Avenue. or other nonsense such as quotes from fairly tells or well known sayings.  The last thing typed appears to be the sentence, "And they lived happily ever after."Ruby says, "Nothing here. Did you find anything? And what do we do now? We should go back soon, I have a headache. Plus we should tell Kate."Jake nonchalantly puts the papers back so as not to draw attention to them.  "Nothing.  If you have no other ideas, we should go back to the hotel."  A new wave of exhaustion hits him."I have no ideas, I didn't sleep good last night either. This stuff makes me tired too. And I told you I have a headache." Ruby looks at the papers that Jake just put down, then she looks into his eyes. "You sure you didn't find anything?""Nothing that will help us or make you feel any better."  Jake takes her hand and kisses it.  "Do you really want to read what is on that piece of paper?  What if it is Turner's words of love to you?  What if it words that show he was once just like us?  What if the words on the paper forever taint something that is precious to us?"  He then smiles.  "It is not so momentous as that, but nothing you need to see.  You are free to examine them, I will not stop you but it may make you sad."Ruby shuts her eyes tight. "I'm already sad Jake," she says softly. "Why don't you kiss me and make me feel better?" Ruby's eyes flutter open and she gazes at Jake. "Please. I need you."Jake gives her a tender kiss.  "Now take me back to the hotel.  Rest with me a while and then I have some things I want you to do for me while I sleep.  Do not leave me alone too long, I do not trust this town.  Let us walk and talk." They tell Nanuet and Minerva they will be at the hotel if they are needed. Jake rambles as they walk, "It is possible that Turner is gone.  Somehow I still have some doubts.  It seems Minerva and Nanuet are determine to stay here and root out any other of these monsters that may be still here."  Jake pulls her close before continuing.  "I would sooner burn this town to the ground, but I find it hard to abandon the two of them.  I know you would be free of this place as fast as possible but consider this..."  Jake glances at her face, "If Turner is gone, you are no longer the target.  If he is not gone then we must stay here and finish what we came to do.  Let us see which is true before we head out." "Chester may wish to let the Sheriff know he is a lawman from Arizona.  Perhaps he will deputize him.  Hades, let the Sheriff deputize me.  That would allow us to do more without fear of going to jail.  We can still leave anytime, I will not be burdened by conscience when it is time to leave.  Talk to Chester for me.  Then there is our friend Katherine.  It might be helpful if she arrived in addition to Maddie.  That would give us some freedom to speak and work with her but still allow Maddie to be independent and a cover for spells if things got ugly."  Jake unintentionally leans on Ruby, the long hours without sleep finally taking their toll.  "If Turner is gone, there is no need for us to pretend not knowing the others.  If he faked his demise, it is because he recognized us.  So it seems to me besides Maddie, there is little need to keep up that charade.  However if we suddenly changed our names we might lose the trust of the lawman.  Talk to the others and see what they think."  Jake sighs heavily and rubs his eyes.  "I am sorry, but I am so tired I can hardly think anymore."As they enter the hotel Ruby squeezes Jake's hand. "You don't need to apologize baby. I know you're trying very hard to do the right thing." Jake is so weary he doesn't realize how weary Ruby is too. They climb the stairs and enter their room. Ruby undresses and slips into Jake's recently discarded shirt. She sits on the edge of the bed, "I will do what you ask. I will get up later and talk to everyone. You know I'll do anything I can to help."Jake hangs his pistols on the bedpost, puts his shotgun under the bed and tucks the derringer under the pillow.  He looks at Ruby who is shaking her head and he laughs.  He gets undressed and crawls under the blankets pulling Ruby in with him.  Only moments go by before he is asleep.After Jake is asleep Ruby slides out of bed and pours herself a large whiskey with some added kick. She drinks it as quickly as she can and crawls back into bed. She almost immediately relaxes as she cuddles right up to Jake, snuggling as close as she can without smothering him. It only takes minutes before she happily passes out.A few hours pass before Ruby wakes. Her sleep had been fitful but at least there were no dreams. She watches Jake sleep for a while, wanting nothing more than to stay with him in bed forever, but that wish was not to be. She gets out of bed and dresses, stopping only once for a drink to help her ever present headache and worry. She knew it would kick in soon enough and help her relax. She kisses Jake lightly on the cheek then exits the room, heading to Kate's.Ruby knocks on the door softly, "Maddie? Hello, are you home?" Kate sat up on the bed, taking off the cool cloth she'd had laying over her eyes.  "I'm here, you can come on in." Ruby glances up and down the hallway, making sure no one is looking before slipping into Kate's room. She plops down on the bed next to her. She is quiet for a few long moments before speaking. "It's very hard having you like this." "Imagine being like this.  My skin feels too tight.  I can't do or say the things I want to.  If I see something I can't just do something about it, I have to find some way to let one of you know without being obvious about it.  And if something seems to be wrong, I can't just ask.  I feel very alone.  This is safest for me, I know, but I hate it." "So then why'd ya do it? Jake mentioned me hiding too, but I didn't want to. I don't like to hide... hide like that anyway." "Because it's an advantage in other ways.  Not being seen as one of the group lets me talk to people who take a dislike to you.  And people are protective of a young woman traveling alone, they may be more open to me.  Plus I would be a surprise for Turner that he didn't prepare for if he knew you were coming.  I just didn't realize it would be so...  divisive, I guess.  How much I would have to compromise to keep up the story." "I don't know what divisive means, but it is hard, that's for sure. I can't say anything to you and pretending like I don't know you..." Ruby sighs then turns on her side, resting her head on her hand. "It stinks." She is quiet for a moment, then she laughs. "Even as Maddie your room is still totally neat. And my room is still a mess and only been in it one night! Even as crappy a night as it was some things stay the same. I can't wait to be done here. Have I mentioned that this stinks?" "Once or twice," Kate laughed lightly.  "I'm going to do something I shouldn't."  She got up and carefully closed the curtains and locked the door.  Then she reached up and took the clip out of her hair.  She felt her body shift back to its own form and sighed.  "Oh, that's so much better."  All the pins that had been in her hair rapidly followed the clip.   Kate walked back over to the bed and hugged Ruby.  "I can't wait to be done either.  I want to go home." Ruby hugs Kate back. "That's better Kate. I don't like you as Maddie, it's not you. I mean, it is, but it isn't... oh you know what I mean!" Ruby release her grip on Kate and lets herself fall back on the bed. "All this stuff, everything going on right now, it's so hard. I hate like it. Colin, the traveling, Jake... it's too much for me. And right after all the Cowboy stuff too. I'm sure you're worn out too, it hasn't been easy on anyone." "I'm exhausted.  I was so looking forward to resting and Conrad and I were just getting close and then having to leave...   I've noticed you've been fuzzy, like you're trying to go away like I did after you told me about Morgan Earp, but you're still here.  I can't fix the Colin problem for you, but maybe I can help with Jake?" Ruby immediately stiffens. "Ah...the last time I tried talking about Jake it didn't go so well. As for fuzzy...I, ah... realize I haven't been dealing so well with all the stress. I've been having bad dreams, having been sleeping well, been stressed. Same as everyone else." "Well, let me give you just one piece of advice to help with Jake, dear.  Tom and I had our worst fights and misunderstandings when one or the other of us was having a hard time.  When you're already tired and confused, the most innocent remark can seem critical, or you can take out your frustrations on him just because he's there.  I know it doesn't help right now while you're both stressed, but try to think twice about what you say, and what he says to you.  What is said and what is heard can be completely different." "The thing is Kate, Jake and I are not you and Tom. We're different. We're not used to being with someone else like this or being in love at all. And we're not the type of people who think about everything they say before they say it." Ruby gazes up at the ceiling. "But you're right; I don't understand what he says to me a lot of the time, I get confused." "Not being used to it is doubly a reason to think.  I don't expect either of you to change who you are.  I'm not saying to think before you speak, although that would be good," she said with a little smile.  "Just to think after.  When Jake says something you don't understand, ask.  And believe what he tells you.  You two are learning how to trust each other; you're both used to listening for the double-meaning in every comment.  Practice taking each other at face value.  It'll take a while, but you can do it." Ruby sighs and she closes her eyes, "I do ask. He doesn't answer in a way I can understand. I think... I'm afraid I'm messing things up with him. I think I told you about what I said to him... well, everyone thinks I was wrong. I guess I was," she shrugs even with her eyes closed. "I need to straighten things out and don't know how. But Kate," Ruby rolls over, opens her eyes and looks dreamily at Kate, "He's so much sweeter and kinder and caring than people think. And he's so protective, I LOVE that about him, I really do. And he's romantic and thoughtful. You can't even imagine. He's so special and unique and perfect for me. I'm really scared I'm messing things up. I don't know how to be a girlfriend, forget about being a good girlfriend." "Honey, I wish I could tell you what to do, but every couple is different.  About what you said to him about marriage, just don't push.  Don't try to tell him it's ok if he doesn't want to get married, show him that you're going to be around married or not and give him a chance to get used to the thought. And he is special.  You just try to be for him what he is for you, and you'll be fine." Ruby smacks the bed with her hand, "It's not good enough. I want some answers!" She settles herself down and concentrates on breathing. She sighs and continues in a softer voice, "I’m not pushing him. Why does everyone think I'm pushing him? I ASKED a question is all." She picks at a stray thread hanging off the blanket. "I UNDERSTAND him not wanting to marry me. I mean, who would really?" She rolls her eyes, "Yes, yes I know I get asked all the time. But not from anyone who really knew me." She shakes her head, her red hair sprawling out on the bed around her, "It's not the point. If you tell a man that you will be around, married or not, then why would they ever marry you?" "I didn't mean pushing about marriage, but I'm guessing you've tried to have talks about you said?  Trying to make it sound less serious or you didn't really mean it?  I mean just let it go, stop trying to make it better.   And I want you to consider something.  Tell me how you felt about marriage before you met Jake, and before Aphrodite entered your life." "I can't just let it go Kate. You don't understand. I guess that's a good thing that you can't see the way things have been for me." She scrunches her nose as she ponders. As she lays quietly thinking her face and body relaxes slightly and her eyes get a little unfocused. "Hmmm... what did I think about marriage? Well, I thought I would never ever ever do it. That's what I thought." A silly smile crawls onto Ruby's lips. "But that's before I met Jacob Alistair Cooke, the man I didn't know was the man of my dreams." She bursts into a fit of giggles before continuing, "I didn't want anyone to own me. But Jake isn't like that, you know? And he cares about me and loves me." "You're right, he isn't like that.  It's why you trust him, and to know that someone trusts you so much that they are willing to give up their freedom can be frightening.  I was scared stiff about being married to Tom; thinking I would let him down somehow.  Just knowing he'd left his heart in my hands made me afraid I might somehow break it.   I can't claim to know how Jake thinks or feels.  But I'd say he knew how you felt about marriage and your change of heart tells him that you truly feel he's your white knight.  And it makes him afraid that he can't live up to the man you see.  Jake never believes us when we tell him he's a good man; he doubts himself.  I think he fears failing you, not marriage." Ruby's head had started getting that comforting fuzzy feeling as Kate had been speaking. She smiles at her friend, trying so hard to comfort her. "Yes... yes you're right," Ruby answers softly. "Maybe Jake is afraid of failing me. Silly boy, he doesn't understand that he can't no matter what he does." Ruby stretches out her long legs and sighs again. "Sometimes you're so smart Kate. Jake IS my white knight. But maybe I put too much pressure on him. I know I've changed." She looks out Kate's window and up into the blue sky. "Things are different for all of us now. Oh well. We can go home and maybe things will go back to the way they were." She flops her head to gaze at Katherine's dark features. "Except of course where you don't want them to go back to where they were before." "He puts the pressure on himself, honey.  Just forgive him when he makes mistakes, and love him when his faults peek out.  Not to say you should never give him a hard time," she laughed.  "But don't hold grudges.  He'll learn soon enough that he doesn't have to be perfect, he just has to love you. Things are different now, but mostly in good ways for me.  I don't need to go back anymore as long as I can keep going forward." "I meant something else entirely... maybe something about Conrad?" Ruby smiles and pulls herself up with great effort. "I should go and take a nap. I'm tired, haven't been sleeping very well. I might have mentioned that already." She rises off the bed. "Sorry you have to be Maddie but I hope we'll be home soon and you won't have to worry about it anymore." Kate reached up and took Ruby's hand.  "Don't go yet.  I've been so lonely....  And what about Conrad?" she asked, blushing hard. Ruby pauses. Trying to figure out if she should stay or go back to Jake was confusing her. "Alright Kate, I'll stay a few more minutes." Without letting go of Kate's hand she lets herself fall back onto the bed. "I should go back to Jake soon though, I always miss him when we're apart. Isn't that silly? I feel like a schoolgirl with a crush." She smiles dreamily again and stretches her arms out over her head. "He's so handsome..." Ruby fades into her thoughts for a few moments before snapping back. "As for Conrad... I only meant that maybe you didn't want things with him to be the same as they were... when you get back." Kate took her free hand and smoothed Ruby's hair away from her forehead.  "And how do you think things are between Conrad and I?" "I think you like him." She pauses. "A lot." Ruby shrugs, but continues to enjoy Kate's touch. "But maybe you think you want more." "And you believe I should reconsider that," she said gently.  "I do like him.  He's changed a great deal since we first met, and I find I like that.  He's not perfect by any stretch of the imagination, but when he says he loves me....  I believe it.  I don't know if he still wants to marry me, he doesn't seem like the marrying kind.  Right now I just want to enjoy being close to someone again and figure out if I do want more." "No, I didn't say that at all. I think you have to follow your heart. I just didn't want you to get married for the wrong reason and chain yourself down forever to the wrong man." Ruby's eyes flutter a little and she stretches again, snuggling into the bed. "If you like him you should be with him. He just doesn't seem like your type, whether he loves you or not." "I couldn't marry him like that.  If I do marry him someday it should be only because we want to be together.   He wasn't my type when I met him, but he's rapidly becoming a man I can love.  And I need the lightness and humor he has, and a little bit of the western scoundrel too.  I do like him, but I'm not going to be rash.  It may seem rash to all of you, but I'm not doing anything without thinking first." "Rash? No, not rash. Some people make the wrong decisions for the wrong reasons. And even the right decision made for the wrong reason can be a wrong decision." Ruby purses her lips in confusion at her own words, but continues anyway. "It doesn't seem like you are or you would have married him already." "Kate I don't think I've told you but you're doing a good job. Losing your husband and coming out here and staying anyway and now you're successful, with a ranch and a school and you seem happy. I can't even handle this little bit of stress I've got. I just don't know how to do it." "Thank you, I needed to hear that.  Sometimes I feel like I just make mistake after mistake," she laughed.  "And your little bit of stress is not a little bit.  This thing with Turner has been awful.  With Jake, you never stayed around to care about someone before, so you're learning on the spot how to do it.  Of course it's hard, and confusing, and mistakes will be made.  Don't beat yourself up for not being perfect." "Turner and Jake, yes it's been hard." Ruby's eyes stay glazed but she laughs, "But Katherine Kale, I AM perfect," before she breaks out into a fit of giggles. "Or at least there used to be many man and maybe even a woman or two who thought so." "Perfection is overrated.  In fact, perfect people are usually annoying. You are delightfully flawed, which of course makes you nearly perfect."  Kate took a deep breath.  So much for the buttering up.  "What I'd like to know," she continued casually, "Is when you took your last dose of Laudanum." Ruby had been smiling and relaxed and she stays that way. "Katherine Kale," she responds equally casual, "What ARE you talking about?" Ruby stretches again but keeps her relaxed gaze on Kate. "Opium you drink, I'm sure you're familiar with it.  I can certainly understand if you've been having a hard time getting to sleep lately and need a little help.  When Tom was ill the doctor gave it to me now and then to help me rest, but never more than two nights in a row.  He always said the last thing I needed was to be just as sick as my husband when we broke the addiction." Ruby sets her eyes on Kate. "Yes, I've been having trouble sleeping lately. But what would give you the impression that I am addicted to opium?" Kate shifted a little so Ruby's head was comfortably in her lap.  It was the same way she'd sat with Tom in the early days of his illness.  She went back to stroking Ruby's hair.  "I don't think you are.  Yet.  But I've seen enough of those vacant stares and faraway smiles to know someone using laudanum when I see it.  And at this time of day you didn't use it to help you sleep.  Just take care.  Use it to help you sleep now and then, but don't take it constantly.  Or I'll end up holding the bucket while you empty your stomach when you run out." "That won't happen!" Ruby sits up in the bed, now obviously tense. "You don't know what's it's like... with Colin chasing me... with Jake, he doesn't want me anymore... with the nightmares of getting turned into one of them or having the life sucked out of me or Jake having to kill me with a stake through my heart... or even the ones about getting married! Those used to be good and they aren't anymore. So you don't know Kate," she finishes stubbornly. "I didn't say I did, Ruby.  I only know that drug will add to your problems, not solve them. And if you think Jake doesn't want you anymore, then you're just flat out crazy.  Why would he be here otherwise?  To do the world a favor?"  She shook her head.  "No.  That man is just plain in love with you.  Silver Jake Cook wouldn’t do all this for anyone else." "Love or not he didn't want me earlier. He turned me down Kate. He's NEVER done that before. No one's done that before, not to me." Ruby takes a moment and calms herself down. She sits up tall in the bed and smoothes her dress. "I should go now." Kate stifled a laugh and tried to beat down the grin that wanted to come to her face.  She grabbed Ruby's hand.  "Honey, there's a first time for everything.  And men... ummm..."  Kate blushed.  "When they're very worried or stressed...  And Jake is very worried about you.  Well, sometimes they can't.  I thought you'd have known that." "Can't?" Ruby repeats in disbelief. "You must be mistaken. Even if you aren't I've never been turned down before for any reason..." She accents the next word, "EVER. E-V-E-R." She can't help the pout that forms on her lips. "I didn't like it. I DON'T like it." "I never did either, and believe it or not Tom rarely said no to me.  And trying at a time like that is just frustrating.  Better to take care of what's worrying him and then see how he feels about it." "That's not how it should work!" Ruby says forcefully. She rises off the bed. "I don't want it to work that way. And with the way things are for us we would never get to be together! How can I take care of all our problems? It's impossible!" Frustrated Ruby's fists ball up but she makes herself relax. She says softly, "I just want to be with him, I don't care about any of this other crap. It's too much to worry about, I can't deal with it anymore." She walks to the door and facing it says, "I just want to disappear where no one knows who we are and it's just us. Then I wouldn't ever have these problems anymore." "Of course it's impossible.  That's why you do it together.  And I can't see either of you being happy hiding from the rest of the world."  All signs of mirth fled from Kate's face.  "I'm sorry I can't make it all right for you, Ruby.  I can't find the magic words to help you.  All I know is that I'm certain Jake loves you, and that's the most precious thing you have.  After that it's up to you." She turns her face to Kate, looking back over her shoulder. She musters a lame smile, "Thanks Kate." She tries to look cheery, "I'm sure once this Turner thing is over it'll be alright." Kate walked over and hugged her.  "Aphrodite promised you love, she didn't promise it would be easy.  It's work now and then too.  We will get through this, and you and Jake will have that time.  If you need me I'll be here, my head still hurts." Ruby turns toward Kate and hugs her tightly. It felt really good for that few moments to be wrapped in caring arms. "Thanks again Kate," she whispers in her ear. "I know I have to get things straightened out. I'm thinking of taking a vacation when this is over." "I have a headache too, I'm going to lay down. I hope you feel better soon." She gives Kate a final squeeze then slips out the door. A moment later there is another knock. Kate opens the open. Ruby begins, “I forgot. Jake thinks it’s time for Katherine Kale to show up. He has all his ideas and he agrees it’s too hard to not be able to speak with you when we do what we have to do. So if you have to be Maddie you can but you can also be Kate. I don’t know how he expects Kate to just show up but maybe if you just walk out of your room then no one will even bother asking.” She shrugs. “I don’t know, you can figure that part out. And Chester too, we won’t pretend to not know him. But Jake and I have to keep pretending to be married because I don’t know why. But that’s what Jake said.” She shrugs again. “Ok, back to nap. See you later.” Without waiting for a response Ruby leaves. Kate watches her meander down the hallway, running her hand over the wallpaper as she walks.</blockquote>

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