NOW LIVE! Today's the day you meet your new best friend. You don’t have to leave Wolfy behind... In 'Pets & Sidekicks' your companions level up with you!

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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Rel" data-source="post: 2469890" data-attributes="member: 99">I know it can be tough in a small group but I think you should just let this guy be.  I've told this story before several times but I used to play with a friend of mine who was very much the "Casual Gamer" but I didn't understand that term back then.  Myself and the other GM's for our group would always push this guy to do more and build big plot hooks around him, trying to draw him into the game more.  And we were always frustrated and disappointed when he refused to take the bait.Finally I confronted him directly about it and he got pretty mad.  He explained that he really just wanted to hang out with us (we were all very close friends) and enjoyed playing some small part in the game but didn't want to be in the spotlight or have the plot centered around him.  He couldn't understand why we didn't respect his style of play and were constantly pestering him with these plot hooks and so forth when he was more than content to just hang in the background and enjoy the scenery.I took a hard look at how I had been pushing him and always irritated with him for not playing the game the same way that I would have and realized that he may not be the most valued player in terms of driving the plot, but he was a very good friend of mine and I enjoyed hanging out with him too.  I also read Robin Laws' book that described his behavior perfectly as a Casual Gamer.  So I eased off and things were much better after that.  He would step in and shine occasionally but more often he just did his Casual Gamer thing and everybody was a lot happier.Unfortunately, several months after this big epiphany, he died at a horribly young age.  One of my regrets is that I didn't come to the realization sooner that just because he didn't engage the game as fully as I would have didn't mean he wasn't having fun.  I wish that we could have spent more of our years gaming together without all the frustration and irritation that came from me thinking of him as a passive player.Make of that what you will.</blockquote>

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