Upgrade your account to a Community Supporter account and remove most of the site ads.

Reply to thread

Message: <blockquote data-quote="SteveC" data-source="post: 4599301" data-attributes="member: 9053">I think this is another case of not everyone respecting the fact that people's time is a precious commodity. As Joe is a lawyer, he is in the actual position to know how much his time is worth, as he actually bills it out <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt="(:" title="Smile    (:"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname="(:" />)), but as I get older and have more responsibilities I find that time is my most important resource. I was in a gaming situation much like is described here, and I had to finally sit down with the married player and let him and his wife know that as much as I understood the issues of childcare and difficult job schedules, lack of respect for my time (scheduling something and then breaking it, putting out unrealistic expectations about availablity, and in my case calling to constantly ask for the SO to go home for one chore or another after he was at the game) just wasn't something I was going to stand for. It wasn't something I should have to stand for, and if the situation was reversed, they'd be right to be upset with me about it. People on ENWorld don't always know the real person behind the poster, but I tend to be a very even keeled live-and-let-live sort of person, so by the time this happened, these issues had been going on for a long time, so it wasn't just a knee-jerk reaction. The person who's at fault here (if it's anyone) is Joe's married friend, because it's his responsibility to work out the details of when he can and can't game out with Joe, and to work those out with his wife as a couple. In my case, the player eventually had to step away from the game, because he just couldn't play with any remotely reasonable schedule: we ended up gaming once a month, with constant interruptions. Sometimes you have to make tough choices and compromises, and the new husband has to learn this in order to make a lot of things in his marriage work, not just gaming. That's my $.02: I suggest Joe have a talk with his player and ask him to work out when and how he can play, which might include "whenever I can, just run without me." --Steve</blockquote>

Verification