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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Charlaquin" data-source="post: 7955167" data-attributes="member: 6779196">It’s a big world out there full of lots of people, obviously there must be some DMs who would welcome this kind of collaborative home brewing with their players, but in my experience it is extremely atypical. I think most DMs would be willing to hear out a player with a proposal for a house rule, but I don’t think most would be likely to adopt such a suggestion unsolicited, unless it just happened to be a perfect fit for their tastes.It’d be like an actor coming to the director with ideas about how they think the movie should go (Mark Hamill is actually a real life example of an actor with this habit). Many directors will listen to the suggestion out of politeness, but few will end up adopting the suggestion, because at the end of the day it’s the director’s vision that guides the making of the film, not the actors’.Now, it is generally good DM practice to discuss potential house rules with their players. If the DM recognizes that there’s something they would like to change, they might solicit their players for suggestions, and/or run their own ideas for changes by the players for feedback. But that’s a key difference, it’s the DM asking the players for input, rather than the players offering input that wasn’t asked for and may not be wanted.My advice, if you wish to remain a player, is to discuss with any DM who’s group you might join this interest you have in participating in the development of homebrew, before your first session with them. See how they feel about receiving that kind of player input. I expect you will find that most DMs are not too keen on the idea, but might be willing to entertain suggestions, with the corollary that if they say no, that’s the end of the discussion. But you might find some who like the idea. Either way, it’s important to set those expectations first, before they have the chance to become a problem like they have here.As for the advice to no longer play with this friend of yours: I’m going to echo it as well: your tastes are too dissimilar, continuing to try to play together is not going to be fun for either of you and will only continue to result in strife. Maybe after some time enjoying gaming apart from each other, you might try again, but at least for now, going your separate ways in terms of gaming is the only path forward that doesn’t just result in more hurt feelings and strain on the friendship. I know it sucks, but good friends don’t always make good RPG group mates.</blockquote>

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