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I need bad D&D jokes! (my players stay out)
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<blockquote data-quote="tsadkiel" data-source="post: 331705" data-attributes="member: 262"><p>An Archmage with a drinking problem has a brilliant idea: he animates his shoes so that no matter how stinking drunk he gets, the shoes will always be able to lead him home.</p><p> </p><p>And for a month or so, this works wonderfully. But soon, he finds himself waking up in strange places - he begins drinking in Eversink and wake up in Gaunt, or the Underdark, or Sigil. Finally he realizes that the shoes had gotten bored with just going back to his home every night, and had become adventurers.</p><p></p><p>This won't do at all. He sells the shoes. They come back. He gives the shoes away. They come back. He opens a portal to Elemental Fire, and tosses the shoes in. They don't come back.</p><p></p><p>Soon the archmage starts to feel guilty. After all, he'd given the shoes life, and then casually destroyed them when they became inconvenient. So he searches out all the greatest clerics on the face of the world, hoping for some way to ease his guilt. Finally, a half-mad hermit tells him that he doesn't need to worry - the shoes entered the Seven Heavens immediately,a nd are enjoying eternal bliss.</p><p></p><p>Because it turns out, shoes have souls.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="tsadkiel, post: 331705, member: 262"] An Archmage with a drinking problem has a brilliant idea: he animates his shoes so that no matter how stinking drunk he gets, the shoes will always be able to lead him home. And for a month or so, this works wonderfully. But soon, he finds himself waking up in strange places - he begins drinking in Eversink and wake up in Gaunt, or the Underdark, or Sigil. Finally he realizes that the shoes had gotten bored with just going back to his home every night, and had become adventurers. This won't do at all. He sells the shoes. They come back. He gives the shoes away. They come back. He opens a portal to Elemental Fire, and tosses the shoes in. They don't come back. Soon the archmage starts to feel guilty. After all, he'd given the shoes life, and then casually destroyed them when they became inconvenient. So he searches out all the greatest clerics on the face of the world, hoping for some way to ease his guilt. Finally, a half-mad hermit tells him that he doesn't need to worry - the shoes entered the Seven Heavens immediately,a nd are enjoying eternal bliss. Because it turns out, shoes have souls. [/QUOTE]
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