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Message: <blockquote data-quote="StupidSmurf" data-source="post: 2736347" data-attributes="member: 35893">Interesting thread....Funny, of late I had asked my wife why it seems that so many gamers I've known are flaming arse-holes? I mean, does the game attract them or something, and is it related to the ability (or lack thereof) to communicate in a civil fashion with others? Because for every story I can tell about someone really cool and nice that I met via roleplaying, I have an ugly story about someone who was really over the top horrible.Here are my opinions on the matter and reactions to what I've read here. I realize that some of them are generalizations, so please bear with me:1. I think RPGs as a rule tend to attract opinionated, stubborn, contrary folks who possess at least half a brain. In esssence, people who like to think outside the box, or act outside the box, or at least aren't crazy about conforming.1A. Now that I think of it, I can't think of any gamers I've played with who were "not too bright" and who ended up staying with the game for an extended period of time.2. In order to have an effective RPG session, there ideally needs to be a certain amount of conformity (within context of the game), and definitely some checking of egos at the door. Note the use of the word "ideally". When it doesn't happen, problems can result. Try telling a bunch of non-conformists to conform. Hah.  <img src="http://www.enworld.org/forum/images/smilies/laugh.png"  class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":lol:" title="Laughing    :lol:" data-shortname=":lol:" /> 3. Let's face it...we're engaged in a hobby where the purpose is to pretend we're someone else, in a situation removed from reality. It's escapism, but it goes beyond the average idea of escapist fare in our society, which usually involves going to movies or reading a book. For a lot of people, those average ideas are enough....we take it a step further, and that alarms a lot of people. Most people believe that "Let's pretend" is something you stop doing when you're a kid, right up there with sucking your thumb, believing in Santa, and wetting your pants. Roleplaying is "Let's pretend" on steroids.4. A companion thought to #3....society in general will tolerate, even approve, of people who are fanatics in certain areas of entertainment. Sports fans, for instance. Movie buffs, kind of, yeah. Golf fanatics, sure. But roleplaying? Whoa...watch out there. Get the so-called experts and criminal psychologists online, B.A....it's those Satan-worshipping, heavy metal-listening, sword-waving, soap-avoiding, furry-boinking weirdos! Hide the kids! And sadly, not many people are willing to try it out for themselves (see point 3), and learn otherwise. Their minds are already made up.5. Oh, and the whole concept that we gamers are somehow brighter than the so-called common man is so much horsecrap.6. The problem with people who are headstrong, outside-the-box, unconventional, non-conformists is that certain things sometimes tend to fall by the wayside. Things such as manners....or the ability to swallow the ego and compromise...or personal hygeine. AGAIN, this is not all RPers...heck it's not even the majority...but there sure seems to be an alarming proportion of them anyhow. In fact, since I started gaming, I've had to learn a whole nifty set of new phrases. A sample:- Stop staring at my daughter's cleavage or I'll have to kill you.- Stop trying to give my wife a backrub or I'll have to kill you.- Please put your shirt back on.- Please RSVP a party invitation that's sent to you.- Please use a plate or bowl for those chips.- Please do not wipe your chip-greased fingers on the sofa.- Please put your shoes back on.- Please take your feet off the coffee table...and put your shoes back on.- Yell at my children again and you die.- Before you try giving us any more unsolicited advice on how to deal with children, I suggest you go out and have your own. On second thought, considering the kind of person you are, please don't breed.- Why are you shouting so loudly? We're in my living room and you're sitting next to me.- I don't care that the Bludgeons and Flagons game system handles tavern combat better than D&D. This game is D&D, that's what we're playing, and could we please get back to the encounter wherein the party is about to get wiped out by that red dragon's breath?- I am sorry that you don't like how I run the game. This is how I've always run it, people like it, and you already knew going into it how I ran things. I cannot alter my style to perfectly fit every single person's preference, since every single person has a different ideal, and we have ten people. This is how we do it, and it causes the least friction. If you don't like it, perhaps I'm simply not the DM for you. (Note: I've lost a few players with this one...no big loss either)So, in essence, we play a socially misunderstood hobby, usually with a bunch of people who are opinionated, headstrong, and not afraid to speak their minds. Wow. There's a volatile situation for ya.   <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" /></blockquote>

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