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Message: <blockquote data-quote="jollyninja" data-source="post: 3057010" data-attributes="member: 3208">i think the core issue here is that when everyone agrees to do something a certian night, whatever it may be, with their friends and then does not follow through on that agreement it shows a lack of respect for the time and effort spent by their friends. Trying to come before a guy's girlfriend is probably not the way to go but him planning something with her on a night that he already had plans with his friends is a bit of a jerk hing to do, particularly if he doesn't tell you. It's a respect issue not an "everyting should come after the game" issue. the game is irrelivant, if a friend tells me he'll be somewhere and doesn't show, i get a bit miffed if the excuse is not something i would have blown him off forfrom the perspective of a DM, I know that I sometimes play even if I really do not feel like it because I have told my six players that he game will happen on night X at time Y barring uncontrolable events of some kind. So when a player who has a lot less actual effort required of him will not do the same it can be a bit frustrating and I start to wonder why I bother. I can however see the perspective that if he doesn't want to be there he will probably bring the game down a bit but you know what? If you're in a crappy mood, show up, roll dice, go home, it might be that hanging with your friends for a few hours will help. If you are not emotionally mature enough to be able to control yourself then you really do not belong in my group of friends.also, having a kid in my group might be considered a reasonable reason to ditch if it was born the day of the game, otherwise, you better be there (kidding but I had a player show up the day after just to get away from the hubub for a few hours <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f600.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":D" title="Big grin    :D"  data-smilie="8"data-shortname=":D" />) and then only if it was your first born.</blockquote>

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