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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Radiating Gnome" data-source="post: 4966351" data-attributes="member: 150">Well, I didn't find this round as hard to judge as the last, but you two have definitely made me work for it.  I find that I have a favorite that has some glaring, hard-to-forgive holes . . . . so, lets dig in and see where an analysis takes us. Ingredients:There were some strokes of near genius here, and some pretty severe disappointment.  Plantation.  I was keenly interested to see what was done with this ingredient, given that most D&D style fantasy is feudal in flavor . . . the plantation is a sort of 17th -19th century social unit (very much a descendant of the feudal structure), and it could force a very different setting.  In Sow the Seeds, Reap the Harvest (SSRH) and in Bakra's Bond (BB), we find the setting for the entire adventure is the plantation, in the first case a Tabacc plantation, in the second a sugarcane/rum distilling one.  There are strong similarities in the way this element is used in both -- and both use a grand ball of sorts (in a very gone-with-the-wind way) as an important plot point in the adventure.  I find that Bakra's Bond gets more mileage out of the setting, though -- and there is an element of reflected excellence in the way BB uses the spirits that makes the setting work so well for this adventure, so I'm giving a small advantage to BB here. Soaking Backpack. Here's an ingredient that I expected would give the writers fits to use in a developed, Iron DM-worthy way.  This seems to be the most striking failing I found in BB overall -- in the final accounting, despite the thin argument made by the author, there IS no actual soaking backpack in the adventure -- unless you count the backpack we presume is worn by the character who is using divination magic and is guided by the weird.  But, since the entire character is soaking at that point, and the backpack is only soaking because everything is, I think it just doesn't count.  So, no dice there.  SSRH didn't do much better, but at the very least there is a backpack, and it's wet.  The usage was weak and easy to pull out without any impact on the adventure, but at least it was there.  And, if contact with the water weird makes the pc wet, why doesn't something else happen when they encounter the air and earth weirds?  Advantage SSRH.  Ogre Bodyguard.  Both adventures have them, but I think we can all see that Rhatid the terrible is far more interesting and developed.  Big advantage to BB. Three Wishes This is admittedly a real anchovy of an ingredient -- you want to avoid the genie in a bottle cliche, but it's sure hard to come up with something that fulfills this ingredient without being a cliche.  Once again, BB's summary of ingredients at the end of the entry is trying to staple a veneer over the fact that there really are no "three wishes" in this adventure.  Citing that all of the factions/characters in the story are developed enough to have three motivations does a fine job pointing out the strengths of the adventure, but it doesn't quite qualify as a implementation of this ingredient.  SSRH has the "boons" that Mellandra is granted, and that usage is REALLY weak . . . . in large part because those three boons are not really a part of the adventure but of the backstory that leads to the adventure.  I mean, the ingredient's there, in the shadows, but because it's only directly a part of the background for the adventure, it isn't really a necessary part of what the players experience directly -- they could play through the entire adventure without knowing that Arthur had granted three twisted wishes to his wife. There's a caution here for others -- writing an adventure is more than writing the background story that leads to the adventure, and your ingredients are better used in the adventure than if they only appear in the background.  Still, I have to give an advantage to SSRH for actually using the element.Elemental Weirds - Once again, BB has used a monster well -- in this case weaving the renamed weirds into the story as guides, allies, and adventure hook, all in one.  SSRH has weirds in it, but they're an episodic obstacle, not as well woven into the adventure. Symbol of the First Spirits. Again, both entries make use of this ingredient, but the inspirational use in BB is hands down super cool.  It becomes a connected part of the plantation setting, demonstrates in an excellent way one of the best techniques of the successful Iron DMs (using unexpected definitions of words in ingredients) while totally satisfying the expectations for the ingredient.  BIg advantage to BB.So, overall  . . . . BB has a couple of glaring holes, and a couple of true gems.  SSRH doesn't have anything that rises to the quality of BB's good ingredients, but at least covers all the bases.  I'm torn about how to decide on ingredients overall -- how does excellent use of some ingredients balance against only paying lip service to others.   I'm going to call it a wash.Which I feel safe doing, because I think that other elements of the two adventures will help extend a gap.  Usability -- Both should be relatively easy to drop into an existing campaign -- either the hijacked divinations or the invite from a noble to a grand event work passably well -- and the minor requirement that there be a party member capable of some divination magic is not an unreasonable expectation in 3.5 D&D.  Presentation -- At the risk of punishing us all with the idea that longer entries = better presentation, BB is a much more complete, more evocative, more interesting adventure at this stage.  I find it's conceits more believable than those of SSRH, and the added element of the touch of jamaican language gives the entry a flavor advantage over the other.SSRH has some story weaknesses that really left me frustrated.  For instance, the background gives a great deal of importance to the Women's Circle that has the power to force a settlement between Lord and Lady, but they disappear in the background and have no influence in the rest of the adventure -- which ends up being a fairly generic kidnap and rescue story.  Originality -- hands down I need to give this one to BB.  The Spirits as Rum, the excellent use of the Ogre and the Weirds, and the whole package is a stronger, more interesting, and more original adventure.  And also, as much as I must trash talk BB for not really including the three wishes, the idea that each of the NPC factions has multiple motivations points to some better-than-cardboard characterization.  I'm not entirely sure that all three motivations/desires are there for each faction, but the hints are there, and that's unusual enough. (I'll caution you, though, that it's practically never a good idea to tell the reader or the player what their motivations/desires are.  )The Last DregsOverall, as much as the practically missing ingredients sticks in my craw, I think it's pretty clear that Bakra's Bond is the stronger entry here.  But, as a parting thought, let me emphasize that it's still a narrow thing.  Had the two weak ingredients had even ordinary inclusion in the adventure, this would have been an easy choice -- and had SSRH been just a little stronger (maybe capitalizing on ingredients you slighted), it could easily have taken it's complete use of the ingredients to the second round.  I think, CleverNickName, you should keep doing what you're doing well, but if you expect to take your game beyond the second round, you're going to have to do better with the ingredients, too.  Don't settle for lip service. But, with that, CleverNickName advances.</blockquote>

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