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<blockquote data-quote="Nifft" data-source="post: 5931228" data-attributes="member: 6562"><p>Here's how I usually do my judging: 30 points for ingredients (5 each), 20 points for other factors: usability, evocativeness, originality, and following the rules. I'll discuss ingredient use first.</p><p></p><p><strong>Pious Pawn-Broker</strong>: Both of these entries focused more on the "pious" than on the "pawn-broker". In Shoe's entry, the pawn-broker was a standard insane doom cultist, albeit without an explicit divine patron. He is linked to the ghost voice helm element. In Waylander's entry, the pawn-broker was a normal working stiff prior to the events of the module, so score a point for usability there, since his role could be played instead by someone they've done business with before (and the change in personality would then be more evident). Strong linkage to the helm and the dogs.</p><p>Shoe 2/5</p><p>Waylander 3/5</p><p></p><p><strong>Puzzled Nobility</strong>: Shoe's entry showed the nobles no more puzzled than anyone else in the vicinity would have been. They could be easily replaced, and have no particular links to other elements. Waylander's entry used them as the opening act (mildly integral), but the strong linkage to the blink poodle element -- which is used in all acts -- makes them significantly stronger.</p><p>Shoe 0/5</p><p>Waylander 3/5</p><p></p><p><strong>Dying Jungle</strong>: It seems easy to forget that D&D is basically an animist setting, what with dryads and such. So, the idea that a spiritual malady could affect plant life strikes me as both evocative and somewhat original. Shoe also gains points here for tying the dying jungle to the helm. Waylander's jungle felt tacked on. If the ingredient had been "Dying Demigod's Astral Body" he would have gotten full marks, but the jungle could have been removed entirely without diminishing the story.</p><p>Shoe 3/5</p><p>Waylander 0/5</p><p></p><p><strong>Pursued by Pirates</strong>: In both adventures the pirates felt tacked on, just another opponent who could be easily replaced. Neither entry showed strong links to other elements. Shoe's pirates were actively suicidal -- they were chasing an artifact which would destroy them unless they towed it behind their ship with a five mile long rope -- while Waylander's pirates had a motivation that was not original, but at least plausible.</p><p>Shoe 0/5</p><p>Waylander 1/5</p><p></p><p><strong>Blink Dog</strong>: Shoe's link between the ethereal ghosts and the blink dog's planar phase ability was both interesting and original, and tied the blink dog to the helm element. Waylander's blink dogs were tied to several elements: the nobles, the helm, and the pawn-broker. <u>This is how you win</u>, by making elements irreplaceable. For example, it's the fact that they were Blink Dogs which caused the puzzlement of the nobles ("How did our expensive puppies escape?") -- that means they would be difficult to substitute, and that means they were used well.</p><p>Shoe 2/5</p><p>Waylander 4/5</p><p></p><p><strong>Ghost Voice Helmet</strong>: Shoe has made this the MacGuffin item. It has links to the dying jungle and pawn-broker, though the latter strains my credulity -- if I were the high priest of an insane doom cult, and my unholy artifact were stolen, my strategy would not be to open a pawn shop and hope someone brought the artifact back. I'd like to include the pirates here, since they're supposed to be pursuing the helm, but I can't really see how they could have survived their first contact with the helm, nor why they'd want it back if all it would do is <em>confuse</em> them and then make them zombies. Waylander's helm has a <u>reason</u> why it must be a helm (Spelljamming Helm is a bit of word-play, but it's sufficient). It has ties to the blink dogs and the pawn-broker.</p><p>Shoe 2/5</p><p>Waylander 4/5</p><p></p><p><strong>Usability</strong>: Shoe, as I mentioned above, I found the pawn-broker and pirates to have motivations which hindered their use. I also feel that the five mile radius zone of "your PC is now not under your control" isn't particularly useful.</p><p>Waylander, between the intro act and the NPCs in general, I could see a number of ways to adapt this adventure to my games.</p><p>Shoe 2/5</p><p>Waylander 3/5</p><p></p><p><strong>Evocation</strong>: Shoe, I really liked the idea of the spiritual depopulation of the jungle. That's a good image which I'm totally going to steal. Waylander, you had some evocative NPC personalities. You left lots of room for a DM to add his own evocative images, and the locations certainly could be evocative, but you didn't draw it out for me.</p><p>Shoe 3/5</p><p>Waylander 2/5</p><p></p><p><strong>Originality</strong>: Shoe's setup is a very standard insane death cult, albeit one where the high priest has a day job. Waylander's scenario brings us blink dog religion and a portentous comet which the PCs actually end up visiting.</p><p>Shoe 1/5</p><p>Waylander 3/5</p><p></p><p><strong>Following the Rules</strong>: Neither entry was too long for me to read. You both get the full 5 points here.</p><p></p><p><strong>Total Points</strong></p><p>[MENTION=89612]Shoe[/MENTION]: 20/50</p><p>[MENTION=1830]Waylander the Slayer[/MENTION]: 28/50</p><p></p><p></p><p>Congratulations to Waylander.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nifft, post: 5931228, member: 6562"] Here's how I usually do my judging: 30 points for ingredients (5 each), 20 points for other factors: usability, evocativeness, originality, and following the rules. I'll discuss ingredient use first. [b]Pious Pawn-Broker[/b]: Both of these entries focused more on the "pious" than on the "pawn-broker". In Shoe's entry, the pawn-broker was a standard insane doom cultist, albeit without an explicit divine patron. He is linked to the ghost voice helm element. In Waylander's entry, the pawn-broker was a normal working stiff prior to the events of the module, so score a point for usability there, since his role could be played instead by someone they've done business with before (and the change in personality would then be more evident). Strong linkage to the helm and the dogs. Shoe 2/5 Waylander 3/5 [b]Puzzled Nobility[/b]: Shoe's entry showed the nobles no more puzzled than anyone else in the vicinity would have been. They could be easily replaced, and have no particular links to other elements. Waylander's entry used them as the opening act (mildly integral), but the strong linkage to the blink poodle element -- which is used in all acts -- makes them significantly stronger. Shoe 0/5 Waylander 3/5 [b]Dying Jungle[/b]: It seems easy to forget that D&D is basically an animist setting, what with dryads and such. So, the idea that a spiritual malady could affect plant life strikes me as both evocative and somewhat original. Shoe also gains points here for tying the dying jungle to the helm. Waylander's jungle felt tacked on. If the ingredient had been "Dying Demigod's Astral Body" he would have gotten full marks, but the jungle could have been removed entirely without diminishing the story. Shoe 3/5 Waylander 0/5 [b]Pursued by Pirates[/b]: In both adventures the pirates felt tacked on, just another opponent who could be easily replaced. Neither entry showed strong links to other elements. Shoe's pirates were actively suicidal -- they were chasing an artifact which would destroy them unless they towed it behind their ship with a five mile long rope -- while Waylander's pirates had a motivation that was not original, but at least plausible. Shoe 0/5 Waylander 1/5 [b]Blink Dog[/b]: Shoe's link between the ethereal ghosts and the blink dog's planar phase ability was both interesting and original, and tied the blink dog to the helm element. Waylander's blink dogs were tied to several elements: the nobles, the helm, and the pawn-broker. [u]This is how you win[/u], by making elements irreplaceable. For example, it's the fact that they were Blink Dogs which caused the puzzlement of the nobles ("How did our expensive puppies escape?") -- that means they would be difficult to substitute, and that means they were used well. Shoe 2/5 Waylander 4/5 [b]Ghost Voice Helmet[/b]: Shoe has made this the MacGuffin item. It has links to the dying jungle and pawn-broker, though the latter strains my credulity -- if I were the high priest of an insane doom cult, and my unholy artifact were stolen, my strategy would not be to open a pawn shop and hope someone brought the artifact back. I'd like to include the pirates here, since they're supposed to be pursuing the helm, but I can't really see how they could have survived their first contact with the helm, nor why they'd want it back if all it would do is [i]confuse[/i] them and then make them zombies. Waylander's helm has a [u]reason[/u] why it must be a helm (Spelljamming Helm is a bit of word-play, but it's sufficient). It has ties to the blink dogs and the pawn-broker. Shoe 2/5 Waylander 4/5 [b]Usability[/b]: Shoe, as I mentioned above, I found the pawn-broker and pirates to have motivations which hindered their use. I also feel that the five mile radius zone of "your PC is now not under your control" isn't particularly useful. Waylander, between the intro act and the NPCs in general, I could see a number of ways to adapt this adventure to my games. Shoe 2/5 Waylander 3/5 [b]Evocation[/b]: Shoe, I really liked the idea of the spiritual depopulation of the jungle. That's a good image which I'm totally going to steal. Waylander, you had some evocative NPC personalities. You left lots of room for a DM to add his own evocative images, and the locations certainly could be evocative, but you didn't draw it out for me. Shoe 3/5 Waylander 2/5 [b]Originality[/b]: Shoe's setup is a very standard insane death cult, albeit one where the high priest has a day job. Waylander's scenario brings us blink dog religion and a portentous comet which the PCs actually end up visiting. Shoe 1/5 Waylander 3/5 [b]Following the Rules[/b]: Neither entry was too long for me to read. You both get the full 5 points here. [b]Total Points[/b] [MENTION=89612]Shoe[/MENTION]: 20/50 [MENTION=1830]Waylander the Slayer[/MENTION]: 28/50 Congratulations to Waylander. [/QUOTE]
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