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Iron DM 2012 -- R2 complete, Finals in Progress
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<blockquote data-quote="Wicht" data-source="post: 5962975" data-attributes="member: 221"><p>My judgment follows:</p><p></p><p>[sblock]I'm going to try to be brief here and if I had more time I might be more critical. If there are specific questions, feel free to ask them. We have two good entries, and I think either could be worked into a fine adventure. As far as following rules, full marks for both. </p><p></p><p>Which brings us to Ingredient Use. Both use the Artist Studio as an essential part of the adventure, so 2 out of 2 points to both. I slightly prefer the Final Dragon of the Curious Case over the other, but I recognize that is purely subjective and 2 out of 2 points to both for Final Dragon. The Battered Manuscript of the Curious Case is also more innovative (kudos to Waylander for that) and I find that other than being mentioned that the manuscript is battered in Master Piece, the adjective has no real bearing on the manuscript itself. So 1 out of 2 for Master Piece and 2 out of 2 for Curious Case. Likewise for Suspended Clergyman, I find myself thinking again the Curious Case is more clever, though both get full points. With both Checks and Balances and Robe of Bones, I find that the uses are good, though not spectacular, but full points all around. I will mention that I think both Robes are far too powerful for actual in-game use, at least as described and at the power levels hinted at in the adventures. As an editor or lead-designer, I would insist on both being somehow made more manageable if they are potentially going to be won by the PCs as treasure. </p><p></p><p>Moving on to Useability, I think both are very useable, though Masterpiece has a weak hook and some conclusions of how things will unfold that might be wrong. Most PCs I know, if approached for a job by an obvious nut, will end up investigating him. Weak hooks are a no-no so I'm deducting a point for that. </p><p></p><p>Coming to Style, I think Curious Case is hands down the winner here. It is presented in a clear, concise manner and is easy to follow. Master Piece suffers a bit from a slight disjointing in the narrative. I think that if the set pieces and events were just broken down with some titles, it would be much better. I also dislike the railroading at the end, with the robe forcing a PC into a transformation (even if it is advantageous). All in all, I think Master Piece has a lot of potential, but it could use a more polish and presentation. </p><p></p><p>In the end I think The Curious Case of the Suspended Clergyman is the clear winner of this round. Congratulations to Waylander the Slayer!</p><p></p><p><strong><u>Master Piece</u></strong></p><p><strong>Follow the Rules</strong> 6/6</p><p><strong>Ingredient Use</strong> 11/12</p><p><strong>Usability</strong> 5/6</p><p><strong>Style</strong> 4/6</p><p><strong>Total</strong> 26/30</p><p></p><p><strong><u>Curious Case</u></strong></p><p><strong>Follow the Rules</strong> 6/6</p><p><strong>Ingredient Use</strong> 12/12</p><p><strong>Usability</strong> 6/6</p><p><strong>Style</strong> 6/6</p><p><strong>Total:</strong> 30/30[/sblock]</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Wicht, post: 5962975, member: 221"] My judgment follows: [sblock]I'm going to try to be brief here and if I had more time I might be more critical. If there are specific questions, feel free to ask them. We have two good entries, and I think either could be worked into a fine adventure. As far as following rules, full marks for both. Which brings us to Ingredient Use. Both use the Artist Studio as an essential part of the adventure, so 2 out of 2 points to both. I slightly prefer the Final Dragon of the Curious Case over the other, but I recognize that is purely subjective and 2 out of 2 points to both for Final Dragon. The Battered Manuscript of the Curious Case is also more innovative (kudos to Waylander for that) and I find that other than being mentioned that the manuscript is battered in Master Piece, the adjective has no real bearing on the manuscript itself. So 1 out of 2 for Master Piece and 2 out of 2 for Curious Case. Likewise for Suspended Clergyman, I find myself thinking again the Curious Case is more clever, though both get full points. With both Checks and Balances and Robe of Bones, I find that the uses are good, though not spectacular, but full points all around. I will mention that I think both Robes are far too powerful for actual in-game use, at least as described and at the power levels hinted at in the adventures. As an editor or lead-designer, I would insist on both being somehow made more manageable if they are potentially going to be won by the PCs as treasure. Moving on to Useability, I think both are very useable, though Masterpiece has a weak hook and some conclusions of how things will unfold that might be wrong. Most PCs I know, if approached for a job by an obvious nut, will end up investigating him. Weak hooks are a no-no so I'm deducting a point for that. Coming to Style, I think Curious Case is hands down the winner here. It is presented in a clear, concise manner and is easy to follow. Master Piece suffers a bit from a slight disjointing in the narrative. I think that if the set pieces and events were just broken down with some titles, it would be much better. I also dislike the railroading at the end, with the robe forcing a PC into a transformation (even if it is advantageous). All in all, I think Master Piece has a lot of potential, but it could use a more polish and presentation. In the end I think The Curious Case of the Suspended Clergyman is the clear winner of this round. Congratulations to Waylander the Slayer! [b][u]Master Piece[/u][/b][u][/u] [b]Follow the Rules[/b] 6/6 [b]Ingredient Use[/b] 11/12 [b]Usability[/b] 5/6 [b]Style[/b] 4/6 [b]Total[/b] 26/30 [b][u]Curious Case[/u][/b][u][/u] [b]Follow the Rules[/b] 6/6 [b]Ingredient Use[/b] 12/12 [b]Usability[/b] 6/6 [b]Style[/b] 6/6 [b]Total:[/b] 30/30[/sblock] [/QUOTE]
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