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IRON DM 2013--Entries, Judgements, Commentary, & Trash-Talk
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<blockquote data-quote="Rune" data-source="post: 6153148" data-attributes="member: 67"><p><strong>Round 1, Match 2 Judgement: MortalPlague vs. Wicht</strong></p><p></p><p>There's a lot to like in both of these entries, so I might dig a little deeper looking for flaws. Both contestants should take that as a compliment; both of these were good entries (well, one was a <em>great</em> entry).</p><p></p><p><em>I'll start with the ingredients.</em></p><p></p><p>For those of you who don't know, a <strong>Poison Pill</strong> can sometimes refer to a literal poison pill (used, for instance, to commit suicide instead of being captured), but also refers to a business practice by which a company averts hostile takeover by diluting the value of its shares. It also has come to refer to an amendment to a legal bill that is intended to prevent the bill from passing. MortalPlague's entry, henceforth referred to as “Mistaken Identity,” uses a literal interpretation of the ingredient—with a twist. It's neat, but, unfortunately, amounts to nothing more than a McGuffin—and not even one the PCs are likely to interact with much. On the other hand, Wicht's entry, which I will refer to as “Haunting,” uses the business interpretation, more or less. And, with it, creates an amazing scenario for the players to get caught up in.</p><p></p><p>The <strong>Decrepit Bridge</strong> in “Haunting” has great atmosphere and a really good connection to the town—and it's current situation. Yet, it really could have been any location and still worked. Sure, it would have felt a little less like <em>Sleepy Hollow</em> if it wasn't a bridge, but, fundamentally, it didn't need to be decrepit or a bridge to work in the adventure. It, therefore, was but window-dressing. “Mistaken Identity” uses the ingredient much better. It <em>absolutely</em> had to be the ancient and decrepit starship bridge that it was. Also, great twist! Some groups might not like it, but I know mine would!</p><p></p><p><strong>Hearsay</strong> is used well by both entries. “Mistaken Identity” might better have called its book, “Eavesdropping” instead of “Hearsay,” but the language of the hints could easily be altered without changing the function. And what a function! The constant whispering of all kinds of—often completely banal—information makes a tedious McGuffin into a flavorful NPC. Nice. But hold on! “Haunting” steps it up with this ingredient—having the villagers intentionally create a web of hearsay as part of their plan is clever. Using it to drive the adventure is beautiful.</p><p></p><p>Unfortunately, the <strong>Hallowed Ground</strong> in “Haunting” was much like it's use of the <strong>Decrepit Bridge</strong>: it makes for good atmosphere, but it doesn't seem especially significant in the context of the whole. In “Mistaken Identity,” it is significant—it's the crux of the whole adventure!</p><p></p><p>Then there's <strong>Heresy</strong>. I would very much like to have known what was in the book, “Heresy,” in “Mistaken Identity.” As it is, I never got a sense of <em>just</em> how it fit in to the four volumes. I assume that it contained the truth about Asceon. But, that's an assumption on my part, because we're never actually told what's in the book. Which is a shame, because it turns an interesting bit of the game into yet another McGuffin. In its current state, it could hardly count as a fulfillment of the ingredient-requirement. Yet, it never really was meant to fulfill that purpose, as far as I can tell. Salander is the real heretic and his beliefs seem to be backed up with the book. But, even this could have been detailed better. We never really get inside his head at all. All we know is that he intends to kill a (false) god (which is more of a blasphemous act than a heretical one, by the way—heresy is fundamentally about <em>belief</em>). It feels like much effort was spent in developing this part of the adventure, and yet much potential was also squandered.</p><p></p><p>“Haunting” is more subtle with its use, but it is also more prevalent. The heretics drive the action, the heresy motivates them to maintain their independence (their very lives could depend on it), and the heresy is the unknown factor that will haunt the PCs has they unravel things. Subtle, but damned good.</p><p></p><p>As for the <strong>Wealth of Information:</strong> “Haunting” does a credible job with the final ingredient, simply overloading the PCs with rumors and rumors and rumors. Forcing the PCs to sort out what's true and what's not—especially with the total collusion within the village and the tricks being played upon them—that's fun. But, while the definition of the ingredient was technically met, I was hoping for a little more. Fortunately, I got it with “Mistaken Identity.” Sure, calling the set of books “Wealth of Information” was a little cumbersome, but it really was a lot of information—in various forms and, more importantly (to me), really felt like wealth. It was something that could (and was) used by a society and by individuals to alter their situations. It was something that had the potential to corrupt and decay a society. It was even something with value relative to the tome and to those possessing or seeking the tomes. And, oh, yeah, it was something to be shared—or collected and closely guarded. Yeah. That's what I was looking for.</p><p></p><p>[spoiler]So, the entries are pretty even as far as the ingredients go. That leaves the adventures themselves. They both look fun. I can see myself running them both. But one of them would require a lot more work for me to run, for a few reasons. “Mistaken Identity” has a lot of potential for fun stuff to happen, but is written very linearly. It's a great premise and has great elements in it. It has a great story, but, ultimately, it feels too much like a story to be run as-is. “Haunting” in contrast, is very open in the way it is designed to play, while, at the same time, being a very tight adventure. It is superb, even for one of Wicht's entries.</p><p></p><p>MortalPlague, I liked your piece. A lot. Based on your performance in this match, I am certain that you'll produce strong entries in future tournaments, if you enter. This time, however, Wicht advances to Round 2.[/spoiler]</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Rune, post: 6153148, member: 67"] [b]Round 1, Match 2 Judgement: MortalPlague vs. Wicht[/b] There's a lot to like in both of these entries, so I might dig a little deeper looking for flaws. Both contestants should take that as a compliment; both of these were good entries (well, one was a [i]great[/i] entry). [i]I'll start with the ingredients.[/i] For those of you who don't know, a [b]Poison Pill[/b] can sometimes refer to a literal poison pill (used, for instance, to commit suicide instead of being captured), but also refers to a business practice by which a company averts hostile takeover by diluting the value of its shares. It also has come to refer to an amendment to a legal bill that is intended to prevent the bill from passing. MortalPlague's entry, henceforth referred to as “Mistaken Identity,” uses a literal interpretation of the ingredient—with a twist. It's neat, but, unfortunately, amounts to nothing more than a McGuffin—and not even one the PCs are likely to interact with much. On the other hand, Wicht's entry, which I will refer to as “Haunting,” uses the business interpretation, more or less. And, with it, creates an amazing scenario for the players to get caught up in. The [b]Decrepit Bridge[/b] in “Haunting” has great atmosphere and a really good connection to the town—and it's current situation. Yet, it really could have been any location and still worked. Sure, it would have felt a little less like [i]Sleepy Hollow[/i] if it wasn't a bridge, but, fundamentally, it didn't need to be decrepit or a bridge to work in the adventure. It, therefore, was but window-dressing. “Mistaken Identity” uses the ingredient much better. It [i]absolutely[/i] had to be the ancient and decrepit starship bridge that it was. Also, great twist! Some groups might not like it, but I know mine would! [b]Hearsay[/b] is used well by both entries. “Mistaken Identity” might better have called its book, “Eavesdropping” instead of “Hearsay,” but the language of the hints could easily be altered without changing the function. And what a function! The constant whispering of all kinds of—often completely banal—information makes a tedious McGuffin into a flavorful NPC. Nice. But hold on! “Haunting” steps it up with this ingredient—having the villagers intentionally create a web of hearsay as part of their plan is clever. Using it to drive the adventure is beautiful. Unfortunately, the [b]Hallowed Ground[/b] in “Haunting” was much like it's use of the [b]Decrepit Bridge[/b]: it makes for good atmosphere, but it doesn't seem especially significant in the context of the whole. In “Mistaken Identity,” it is significant—it's the crux of the whole adventure! Then there's [b]Heresy[/b]. I would very much like to have known what was in the book, “Heresy,” in “Mistaken Identity.” As it is, I never got a sense of [i]just[/i] how it fit in to the four volumes. I assume that it contained the truth about Asceon. But, that's an assumption on my part, because we're never actually told what's in the book. Which is a shame, because it turns an interesting bit of the game into yet another McGuffin. In its current state, it could hardly count as a fulfillment of the ingredient-requirement. Yet, it never really was meant to fulfill that purpose, as far as I can tell. Salander is the real heretic and his beliefs seem to be backed up with the book. But, even this could have been detailed better. We never really get inside his head at all. All we know is that he intends to kill a (false) god (which is more of a blasphemous act than a heretical one, by the way—heresy is fundamentally about [i]belief[/i]). It feels like much effort was spent in developing this part of the adventure, and yet much potential was also squandered. “Haunting” is more subtle with its use, but it is also more prevalent. The heretics drive the action, the heresy motivates them to maintain their independence (their very lives could depend on it), and the heresy is the unknown factor that will haunt the PCs has they unravel things. Subtle, but damned good. As for the [b]Wealth of Information:[/b] “Haunting” does a credible job with the final ingredient, simply overloading the PCs with rumors and rumors and rumors. Forcing the PCs to sort out what's true and what's not—especially with the total collusion within the village and the tricks being played upon them—that's fun. But, while the definition of the ingredient was technically met, I was hoping for a little more. Fortunately, I got it with “Mistaken Identity.” Sure, calling the set of books “Wealth of Information” was a little cumbersome, but it really was a lot of information—in various forms and, more importantly (to me), really felt like wealth. It was something that could (and was) used by a society and by individuals to alter their situations. It was something that had the potential to corrupt and decay a society. It was even something with value relative to the tome and to those possessing or seeking the tomes. And, oh, yeah, it was something to be shared—or collected and closely guarded. Yeah. That's what I was looking for. [spoiler]So, the entries are pretty even as far as the ingredients go. That leaves the adventures themselves. They both look fun. I can see myself running them both. But one of them would require a lot more work for me to run, for a few reasons. “Mistaken Identity” has a lot of potential for fun stuff to happen, but is written very linearly. It's a great premise and has great elements in it. It has a great story, but, ultimately, it feels too much like a story to be run as-is. “Haunting” in contrast, is very open in the way it is designed to play, while, at the same time, being a very tight adventure. It is superb, even for one of Wicht's entries. MortalPlague, I liked your piece. A lot. Based on your performance in this match, I am certain that you'll produce strong entries in future tournaments, if you enter. This time, however, Wicht advances to Round 2.[/spoiler] [/QUOTE]
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