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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Rune" data-source="post: 7314157" data-attributes="member: 67">Round 2, Match 1: Deuce Traveler vs. tglassyI want to start out by saying that I really like both of these adventures. They set different tones and, thus, different expectations of the players, but they both have some very satisfying moral dilemmas for the players to grapple with. I'll get back to this in a bit. First, the ingredients:Mass Hysteria. "Dale's Reckoning" ("Dale") introduces this ingredient mostly as a consequence of failure on the PCs part (or failure to act, at all). As such, it is tied up in the stakes of the adventure. And, as such, this is a strong use of the ingredient. On the other hand, "Quarantine" gets pretty clever with it – presenting both the effects of the plague and the response to it. Throwing out different versions of an ingredient in an entry to see what sticks runs the risk of diluting its significance. That isn't really what's happening here, though. It's more like two sides of the same coin; they're pretty much all about the disease. In that role, they are present throughout the whole adventure. Always looming, always directly relevant to the PCs. This isn't just a strong use; it's exceptional. Dragon Scales. Alas, these appear to be naught more than macguffins in both entries. Neither version needed to be dragon scales to fulfill their roles in the adventure. "Quarantine" gives us some lore to try to explain it, but the lore is no more relevant than the ingredient. Violent Solution. This is another one where "Quarantine" gives us more than one variation of the ingredient. Both the governmental solution and Raynor's solution to the plague-problem have certainly been violent (if ineffectual). One of the solutions presented to the PCs (slaying a dragon) is also violent. Here, the recurrences serve to echo an overarching theme. Significantly, the PCs can take a cue from the actions of the government and of Raynor and choose their course accordingly (although, unlike those others, the PCs actually have a chance of success with the violent option). All of this is directly relevant to the action of the adventure – and the PCs' role therein. I am inclined to view this ingredient favorably. "Dale" doesn't use the ingredient to hang a theme on, but it is just as potent. The central decision that the PCs must face – the one that affects the outcome of the adventure more than any other – is whether or not they choose to kill the dire bear. Strong. Talking Animals. This is obviously weaker in "Quarantine" than in "Dale." Significantly so. In the former, the animals don't even actually talk. In the latter, every single NPC except the Archdruid is a talking animal. Last Laugh l read these entries multiple times. Whenever an entry fails to include an ingredient, I end up expending a lot of extra energy trying to see if I've missed something very subtle somewhere. When my search is ultimately fruitless, my frustration is compounded. I can find no last laugh (metaphorical or otherwise) in "Dale."Meanwhile, as the end stage of the disease in "Quarantine," this ingredient adds color, although not much more to the adventure. At least it's there, though. Mission of Mercy. "Dale" presents us with Dale's mission, merciful because it is penance in place of execution. Adding him to the party is sure to complicate their efforts in fun ways. But, ultimately, the mercy component doesn't really matter. "Quarantine" hands the mission over to the PCs (and, ironically, offers a possible violent solution for it). This is the stronger of the two. Wandering Monster. The wandering monster in "Quarantine" is functional. It's relevance is limited by it's nature, but, as a hook, it's pretty good. I'll say more about the adventures' hooks, later. In "Dale," we get a wanderer who is no monster (Dale) and a (temporary?) monster whose wandering is all done before the adventure begins. It seems to me that there was an opportunity to explore a theme buried in there, somewhere. Unfortunately, however, the ingredient doesn't quite work as presented. On the usage of the individual ingredients, "Quarantine" stands somewhat firmer than "Dale." There's more to it than that, but we'll return to the subject after discussing...The adventures: As I said at the outset, both of these adventures look good. More importantly, they both look fun! But "Dale" raises some fundamental questions that threaten to undermine the foundation of the adventure. And they all, interestingly enough, revolve around the Archdruid. I'll start with the mechanical questions. I recognize and accept that 5th edition D&D doesn't care if its NPCs follow the same rules as the PCs when it comes to their construction. But when the PCs are confronted with a druid who can cast while wild-shaped, they are definitely going to notice and they are going to wonder how. And the adventure doesn't answer that question. That's a problem. Likewise, how the scales were created – and how they do what they do. The scales, collectively, amount to an artifact and this makes the creator seem even more powerful. Is he really a deity? If so, how does killing him factor into things? And, oh yeah, what happens to the dire bear if it is reduced to 0 hp? Does it change into another animal after reverting to normal, like a level 20 moon druid would? Each time they reduce it to 0 hp?That could make for a really cool (and very challenging) encounter, but some guidance is needed. Then there's the fundamental flaw in the Archdruid's original plan. I get the desire to provide a means of keeping future generations Awakened, but why not just teach his first batch to be druids and let them do further awakenings on there own? Surely setting aside a store of 1000 gp agates for spell components would be easier than creating and protecting the scales? And they would be far easier to replenish, too! Okay, the animals might have difficulty with the verbal and somatic components, but, then again, the dire bear didn't seem to have trouble with them. Oh well. There's still a lot of goodness there. I did want to briefly talk about adventure hooks. On the surface, the hooks presented in both adventures are simple and decent enough. "Quarantine" has something deeper, though – when the players hear about (or witness) the giggling ogre, they are bound to get hooked by one of the most potent motivators there is: simple curiosity.Added to this, the different layers of challenges that the PCs will have to negotiate make for a far richer adventure than its length might otherwise suggest. I don't mean to imply that "Dale" is overly simple. It pretty directly gets to the climax, but that climax has enough going on – mystery, a moral dilemma, and a pretty (or, possibly very, depending on the answers to some of the questions raised earlier) challenging combat. This is all very satisfying and the varied possible outcomes that stem directly from the PCs' actions just make it more so. That's the one area of the adventure where "Quarantine" falls somewhat short. It doesn't really present any explicit outcomes. Instead, it gives us some situations and lets us infer the outcomes based on what the PCs deal with – and how. We are given the stakes of various failures, in the guise of goals for success, but little is said of the lose threads that might result – particularly regarding the PCs' relationships with the various factions and NPCs in the adventure. This sandboxy set-up fits my style of DMing well enough, but explicit suggestions would be better. Even so, it is a really solid adventure, through-and-through. And there's one more thing that helps with that: the ingredients. Specifically, how well they are woven together to create the fabric of the adventure itself. I've not said much in this tournament about this because, frankly, it hasn't yet been in evidence well enough to make comparisons, but an IRON DM entry should strive to make every single ingredient as relevant to each other and the adventure as they are to the PCs. The best entries come close. "Quarantine" is one of these. Let's take a look: Mass ysteria is woven throughout the whole and, consequently, is directly tied in to all of the other ingredients. Violent solution is directly tied in with all but the wandering monster, last laugh, and mission of mercy. Talking animals with mass hysteria, last laugh, and wandering monster. Last laugh with all but violent solution. Mission of mercy with all but talking animals. Wandering monster with all but violent solution and dragon scales. Dragon scales with all but talking animals and wandering monsters. Even the ones that aren't directly woven together are tangentially related. That's a tapestry!A good weave like this goes a long way toward mitigating those poorly-used individual ingredients. tglassy, you appear to have an intuitive knack for this. The speed with which you are able to put up a quality, competitive entry is impressive. That speed may have bitten you this time around, though. The later rounds in an IRON DM tournament demand polish from their entrants and your entry could have benefited from it. That said, I don't think I have any other useful advice for you; you're already good. Of course, you might not have beaten Deuce Traveler, anyway. This entry is one of his most solid, and that's saying a lot!Deuce Traveler advances to the championship round. Yet again.</blockquote>

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