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<blockquote data-quote="Iron Chef BBQ" data-source="post: 2973110" data-attributes="member: 1844"><p><strong>The Dogs of War (run of 04-20-04)</strong></p><p></p><p>Our adventurers stand in stunned silence on a hilltop over looking the battlefield. Bears and wolves are roaming about snapping and snarling at each other, the vicious snakes that protrude from their deformed bodies send up a hissing sound that rings through the air like a low level hum. Although they can’t see the weasels, they see the grasses undulating as small creatures scurry through.</p><p></p><p>Quickly and quietly they prepare for battle. Terri prays to Enkhili, mumbling unobtrusively, and Caerwyn and Borin feel the strength of a bull swell within their chests. Marja takes two beautiful, perfect diamonds out of her pocket. Her hands grow cold and hard as she chants. She rubs the stones between her palms and her magic grinds them into a fine, opalescent powder. Chanting all the while, she paints the faces of Kel and Borin crafting beautiful runes upon their cheeks. The magic spreads from the runes as their skin hardens. Marja continues to chant, but this time she pulls feathers from her pocket. Kel, Kira and she rise slightly into the air. Their feet hover just inches off the ground. Kel, himself, has been praying asking Corean to give him the strength of a bull and to bless Caerwyn with added endurance. Kalina chants in a language that sounds like a flock of birds, and now everyone can understand her soft whispers and answer them in tweets and coos themselves. Kalina continues her birdsong, changing the pitch, and everyone, but Kel, Kira and Marja, are transformed into small, fast, black hawks. Just before Terri and Kira begin to transform, they join their rings and disappear.</p><p></p><p>Marja and Kel remain with the archers on the cliff face while the others fly quickly to a tree across the field. Up close they identify 1 bear and 7 wolves. Fang is upset by being in bird form and is only more agitated by the smells that he can only describe as wrong. </p><p></p><p>The woods are riddled with holes. They’ve been digging for something. Now the creatures are just sitting, standing or walking about in the clearing like they are waiting for something.</p><p></p><p>Lucre tries to get an accurate count of how many weasels there might be, but keeps losing track. “Math is hard. Let’s go kill creatures,” whispers Terri. (aside: channeling Invisible Rogue Barbie).</p><p></p><p>They drop to the ground as silently as possible and turn back into humans. Kalina starts the attack. She chants in a strange tongue that sounds like rustling leaves, and briars begin to grow up along the edge of the field blocking retreat into part of the woods. Marja sees the growth from across the field, swoops down and sends a lightening bolt into the wolf pack, killing 5 of them.</p><p></p><p>Kira and Terri creep through the grass and flank a weasel and obliterate it as they both come into view. Five more wolves and two huge moose, all of them covered with snakes, come out of the woods.</p><p></p><p>Two wolves flank Lucre, their snakes grabbing at his ankles, trying to trip him. He is glowing with psionic power. He looks large and bear-like. He keeps his feet, but it hurts. Just as he regains his footing, a moose lunges at him trying to gore him with his antlers. As the creature comes closer, Lucre can see that its fur is not hair, but thousands of tiny snakes. He steps back and uses his psionic weapon focus and power attacks. He kills the moose, but it brushes up against him as it falls, and he feels dozens of tiny fangs bite him. He feels a spike of fever, but shakes it off.</p><p></p><p>Borin moves in and kills a wolf, retreating back into the woods as the first volley of arrows spring from the archers on the cliff. Kel swoops down from the cliff following the arrows. He swings with ferocity, lopping off the head of one wolf and continuing into the chest of another. Both fall dead.</p><p></p><p>Marja lifts her head to the wind. “I hear casting,” she cries. Lucre feels like some other will is controlling his body, but only for a minute. With a roar, he shakes off the feeling. “Something in there can control minds,” he screams over the battle. “If it gets that paladin, we’re all doomed!”</p><p></p><p>Marja moves toward the woods and casts a spell on herself. She scans the woods for things invisible while the others all turn toward the ridge to the sounds of screams. The bear, a moose and black birds are on the ridge attacking the archers. Another wolf lunges at Terri, burying its fangs into her kneecap and pulling her on her back.</p><p></p><p>Suddenly the web of briars disappears. Behind it stands the most beautiful and horrible creature anyone has ever seen. A proud and noble horse stomps the ground, its body entangled in snakes, its eyes red with madness.</p><p></p><p>The battle rages on. Lucre swings the citadel slicing off a moose horn. Arrows continue to rain down with deadly accuracy. Borin runs into the woods. A viper appears, summoned by Kalina, and begins attacking. Fang brings down a wolf. Weeds and brambles spring up slowing down a bear, two wolves and the unicorn. A bear and a moose charge through the archers sending bodies flying through the air, killing three. The unicorn tosses its shimmering head, and a curtain of darkness descends over it. Lucre kills the moose and refocuses. Borin comes running out of the woods and strikes at the viper, killing it and pulling back.</p><p></p><p>Kel casts protection from evil on Marja as she continues to scan the woods for the caster. A cloud of green and yellow gas fills the air engulfing Fang, Caerwyn, Kira, Terri and Lucre. Fang drops to the ground. Inside the cloud they see a vision of swirling fangs and eyes as if the world is full of biting snakes. Then it’s gone. Marja spots two hands rubbing together. She indicates the direction, and Kira, Terri and Lucre dash after her into the woods.</p><p></p><p>The birds continue to peck at the archers who pick them off, unable to penetrate the hides of the bigger beasts. Kel and Caerwyn slash with all their remaining might at the remaining creatures.</p><p></p><p>Lucre moves into the woods and spots an enormous female creature with gray skin, covered with warts and pustules, with wiry hair and yellow eyes. He hustles over to her and slaps her lightly on the arm, but she reels like she’s been thrashed. He empathically transfers many of his wounds to her (30 pts) as he heals. Her skin blisters where his hand struck. She meets his eyes, smiles and licks her lips with a snake tongue. </p><p></p><p>Borin rushes Lucre, and the two struggle, rolling around on the ground. “You’re going to be really embarrassed by this later,” Lucre says to his cousin. The hag looks at Lucre. “Stop fighting,” she commands. She spread her hands, and her fingers spilt to the elbow and become writhing snakes, but before she can descend upon the cousins, she’s temporarily pushed back as Marja blasts her with a lightening bolt.</p><p></p><p>Kira draws her magical dagger and activates her ring. She and Kira disappear. They move in to flank the hag.</p><p></p><p>Meanwhile, out in the field, the archers continue to drop the birds. Kel is a fighting machine. He kills a moose and lunges at a bear. Caerwyn grabs Fang and rushes out of the poison cloud. Kalina is waiting to neutralize the poison. The bear claws Kel who feels a burning sensation through his limbs. His body feels heavy. His bear’s strength is gone. He presses on, however, flying at the next bear. Lt. Trenton rallies his troops, and they succeed in bringing down a bear. </p><p></p><p>Lucre keeps up a tirade of shouts. “Can’t we all be friends?” He lectures the hag, “I’ll have you know, you are morally and ethically bankrupt. Let’s sit down and talk this out.” He refuses to raise his weapon.</p><p></p><p>“I discuss nothing,” she hisses in reply. “I serve the beautiful snake queen.” A blue-black ray shoots out of her snake hands flying toward Marja who manages to fall to the ground avoiding the blast. Marja thinks that it’s a spell known as enervation. “Witch!” Marja calls out. She looks out on the battle field and catches Kalina’s eyes. Her wand is out as she attempts to heal Fang. From out of the sky, gigantic snowballs fall and sleet and hail pummel down on Kalina, Caerwyn, and the weak Fang. She reads Kalina’s face.</p><p></p><p>Marja hurls another lightening bolt at the hag. “NO!” she screams, feeling Kalina’s pain, and even Garnet shudders around her wrist.</p><p></p><p>From out of the silence comes a double attack, and Kira and Terri appear next to the hag with magic dagger in hand and the word “DOOOM” echoing through the air. Suddenly, Borin has dwarven rage across his beautiful elven face. His friends are suffering at this creature’s hands. His fist flies up and smashes into her stomach.</p><p></p><p>The unicorn gallops across the field toward Caerwyn. The ivory horn misses his chest, but the pass knocks him unconscious. Lucre sees Caerwyn drop, and points his sword at him. Suddenly Caerwyn is in the woods next to Borin, and Lucre is in the field facing the one-horned beast. “What?” asks Kel. He was about to reach over and heal Caerwyn, but finds his hands almost touching Lucre. Instead he grabs his sword, turns and kills a bear, turns and kills a wolf. Kalina, loath to leave Fangs side, musters up all her energy and rushes over to Caerwyn and heals him.</p><p></p><p>The hag takes a step away from Borin’s fist and Kira’s dagger and sends the energy of a spell out from her hands. Borin and Terri drop to their knees. They feel the hopelessness and want to give up, but they see Kira howling with rage. They jump to their feet and howl with her just as the chain lightening strikes all three.</p><p></p><p>Marja sends her last lightening bolt into the hag’s chest. Clearly, she is resisting some of the damage from each blow. Marja is tiring. Terri is hurt. Caerwyn is barely standing. </p><p></p><p>Kira jumps forward and thrusts her dagger deep into the hag’s chest. “Suck on it!” she shrieks. Borin swings down with his great axe and splits the hag in two from her neck down. Half of her falls on Kira, and half of her falls on Terri. Snakes slither out of her body.</p><p></p><p>As she dies, Lucre wakes from his pacifist’s dream and hits the unicorn with his full force. Kel steps in and kills it. Suddenly, the field, red with blood and wet, is quiet. A lone bird cries in the sky as one last arrow sends it hurtling to the earth.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Iron Chef BBQ, post: 2973110, member: 1844"] [b]The Dogs of War (run of 04-20-04)[/b] Our adventurers stand in stunned silence on a hilltop over looking the battlefield. Bears and wolves are roaming about snapping and snarling at each other, the vicious snakes that protrude from their deformed bodies send up a hissing sound that rings through the air like a low level hum. Although they can’t see the weasels, they see the grasses undulating as small creatures scurry through. Quickly and quietly they prepare for battle. Terri prays to Enkhili, mumbling unobtrusively, and Caerwyn and Borin feel the strength of a bull swell within their chests. Marja takes two beautiful, perfect diamonds out of her pocket. Her hands grow cold and hard as she chants. She rubs the stones between her palms and her magic grinds them into a fine, opalescent powder. Chanting all the while, she paints the faces of Kel and Borin crafting beautiful runes upon their cheeks. The magic spreads from the runes as their skin hardens. Marja continues to chant, but this time she pulls feathers from her pocket. Kel, Kira and she rise slightly into the air. Their feet hover just inches off the ground. Kel, himself, has been praying asking Corean to give him the strength of a bull and to bless Caerwyn with added endurance. Kalina chants in a language that sounds like a flock of birds, and now everyone can understand her soft whispers and answer them in tweets and coos themselves. Kalina continues her birdsong, changing the pitch, and everyone, but Kel, Kira and Marja, are transformed into small, fast, black hawks. Just before Terri and Kira begin to transform, they join their rings and disappear. Marja and Kel remain with the archers on the cliff face while the others fly quickly to a tree across the field. Up close they identify 1 bear and 7 wolves. Fang is upset by being in bird form and is only more agitated by the smells that he can only describe as wrong. The woods are riddled with holes. They’ve been digging for something. Now the creatures are just sitting, standing or walking about in the clearing like they are waiting for something. Lucre tries to get an accurate count of how many weasels there might be, but keeps losing track. “Math is hard. Let’s go kill creatures,” whispers Terri. (aside: channeling Invisible Rogue Barbie). They drop to the ground as silently as possible and turn back into humans. Kalina starts the attack. She chants in a strange tongue that sounds like rustling leaves, and briars begin to grow up along the edge of the field blocking retreat into part of the woods. Marja sees the growth from across the field, swoops down and sends a lightening bolt into the wolf pack, killing 5 of them. Kira and Terri creep through the grass and flank a weasel and obliterate it as they both come into view. Five more wolves and two huge moose, all of them covered with snakes, come out of the woods. Two wolves flank Lucre, their snakes grabbing at his ankles, trying to trip him. He is glowing with psionic power. He looks large and bear-like. He keeps his feet, but it hurts. Just as he regains his footing, a moose lunges at him trying to gore him with his antlers. As the creature comes closer, Lucre can see that its fur is not hair, but thousands of tiny snakes. He steps back and uses his psionic weapon focus and power attacks. He kills the moose, but it brushes up against him as it falls, and he feels dozens of tiny fangs bite him. He feels a spike of fever, but shakes it off. Borin moves in and kills a wolf, retreating back into the woods as the first volley of arrows spring from the archers on the cliff. Kel swoops down from the cliff following the arrows. He swings with ferocity, lopping off the head of one wolf and continuing into the chest of another. Both fall dead. Marja lifts her head to the wind. “I hear casting,” she cries. Lucre feels like some other will is controlling his body, but only for a minute. With a roar, he shakes off the feeling. “Something in there can control minds,” he screams over the battle. “If it gets that paladin, we’re all doomed!” Marja moves toward the woods and casts a spell on herself. She scans the woods for things invisible while the others all turn toward the ridge to the sounds of screams. The bear, a moose and black birds are on the ridge attacking the archers. Another wolf lunges at Terri, burying its fangs into her kneecap and pulling her on her back. Suddenly the web of briars disappears. Behind it stands the most beautiful and horrible creature anyone has ever seen. A proud and noble horse stomps the ground, its body entangled in snakes, its eyes red with madness. The battle rages on. Lucre swings the citadel slicing off a moose horn. Arrows continue to rain down with deadly accuracy. Borin runs into the woods. A viper appears, summoned by Kalina, and begins attacking. Fang brings down a wolf. Weeds and brambles spring up slowing down a bear, two wolves and the unicorn. A bear and a moose charge through the archers sending bodies flying through the air, killing three. The unicorn tosses its shimmering head, and a curtain of darkness descends over it. Lucre kills the moose and refocuses. Borin comes running out of the woods and strikes at the viper, killing it and pulling back. Kel casts protection from evil on Marja as she continues to scan the woods for the caster. A cloud of green and yellow gas fills the air engulfing Fang, Caerwyn, Kira, Terri and Lucre. Fang drops to the ground. Inside the cloud they see a vision of swirling fangs and eyes as if the world is full of biting snakes. Then it’s gone. Marja spots two hands rubbing together. She indicates the direction, and Kira, Terri and Lucre dash after her into the woods. The birds continue to peck at the archers who pick them off, unable to penetrate the hides of the bigger beasts. Kel and Caerwyn slash with all their remaining might at the remaining creatures. Lucre moves into the woods and spots an enormous female creature with gray skin, covered with warts and pustules, with wiry hair and yellow eyes. He hustles over to her and slaps her lightly on the arm, but she reels like she’s been thrashed. He empathically transfers many of his wounds to her (30 pts) as he heals. Her skin blisters where his hand struck. She meets his eyes, smiles and licks her lips with a snake tongue. Borin rushes Lucre, and the two struggle, rolling around on the ground. “You’re going to be really embarrassed by this later,” Lucre says to his cousin. The hag looks at Lucre. “Stop fighting,” she commands. She spread her hands, and her fingers spilt to the elbow and become writhing snakes, but before she can descend upon the cousins, she’s temporarily pushed back as Marja blasts her with a lightening bolt. Kira draws her magical dagger and activates her ring. She and Kira disappear. They move in to flank the hag. Meanwhile, out in the field, the archers continue to drop the birds. Kel is a fighting machine. He kills a moose and lunges at a bear. Caerwyn grabs Fang and rushes out of the poison cloud. Kalina is waiting to neutralize the poison. The bear claws Kel who feels a burning sensation through his limbs. His body feels heavy. His bear’s strength is gone. He presses on, however, flying at the next bear. Lt. Trenton rallies his troops, and they succeed in bringing down a bear. Lucre keeps up a tirade of shouts. “Can’t we all be friends?” He lectures the hag, “I’ll have you know, you are morally and ethically bankrupt. Let’s sit down and talk this out.” He refuses to raise his weapon. “I discuss nothing,” she hisses in reply. “I serve the beautiful snake queen.” A blue-black ray shoots out of her snake hands flying toward Marja who manages to fall to the ground avoiding the blast. Marja thinks that it’s a spell known as enervation. “Witch!” Marja calls out. She looks out on the battle field and catches Kalina’s eyes. Her wand is out as she attempts to heal Fang. From out of the sky, gigantic snowballs fall and sleet and hail pummel down on Kalina, Caerwyn, and the weak Fang. She reads Kalina’s face. Marja hurls another lightening bolt at the hag. “NO!” she screams, feeling Kalina’s pain, and even Garnet shudders around her wrist. From out of the silence comes a double attack, and Kira and Terri appear next to the hag with magic dagger in hand and the word “DOOOM” echoing through the air. Suddenly, Borin has dwarven rage across his beautiful elven face. His friends are suffering at this creature’s hands. His fist flies up and smashes into her stomach. The unicorn gallops across the field toward Caerwyn. The ivory horn misses his chest, but the pass knocks him unconscious. Lucre sees Caerwyn drop, and points his sword at him. Suddenly Caerwyn is in the woods next to Borin, and Lucre is in the field facing the one-horned beast. “What?” asks Kel. He was about to reach over and heal Caerwyn, but finds his hands almost touching Lucre. Instead he grabs his sword, turns and kills a bear, turns and kills a wolf. Kalina, loath to leave Fangs side, musters up all her energy and rushes over to Caerwyn and heals him. The hag takes a step away from Borin’s fist and Kira’s dagger and sends the energy of a spell out from her hands. Borin and Terri drop to their knees. They feel the hopelessness and want to give up, but they see Kira howling with rage. They jump to their feet and howl with her just as the chain lightening strikes all three. Marja sends her last lightening bolt into the hag’s chest. Clearly, she is resisting some of the damage from each blow. Marja is tiring. Terri is hurt. Caerwyn is barely standing. Kira jumps forward and thrusts her dagger deep into the hag’s chest. “Suck on it!” she shrieks. Borin swings down with his great axe and splits the hag in two from her neck down. Half of her falls on Kira, and half of her falls on Terri. Snakes slither out of her body. As she dies, Lucre wakes from his pacifist’s dream and hits the unicorn with his full force. Kel steps in and kills it. Suddenly, the field, red with blood and wet, is quiet. A lone bird cries in the sky as one last arrow sends it hurtling to the earth. [/QUOTE]
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