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Message: <blockquote data-quote="(un)reason" data-source="post: 5411022" data-attributes="member: 27780">Once again, Merry Christmas everybody. Looks like we have a good few more to go too.Dragon Magazine Issue 216: April 1995part 2/8Bazaar of the Bizarre is brought to you by Bargle the infamous, former high wizard (read, grand vizier <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f600.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":D" title="Big grin    :D"  data-smilie="8"data-shortname=":D" /> ) to the black eagle baron. He's killed Aleena, screwed over a dominion, and now has his own magic manufacturing line. Course, being in it primarily for the money (and how) his items are a classic example of let the buyer beware. Tee hee. April fool. I love this one. Invisible rings disappear when you put them on. They might be mildly useful as brass knuckles, but otherwise this is practically the platonic ideal of pointless. Rings of Destruction gradually turn your body to dust. The trick here is of course to make sure it's your enemy that puts them on, as with all cursed items. The ring of the eagle lets you turn into a black eagle. As this is one of his oldest items, it's also entirely reliable, because his previous employer would probably apply some violence if he messed up. Rings of fashion give you a snappy outfit. Well, an outfit in a snap, anyway. Hoo boy. Fashion can be a fickle thing <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f600.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":D" title="Big grin    :D"  data-smilie="8"data-shortname=":D" /> Rings of ideas are either going to save your ass, or completely ruin the party's day. Either way, they should keep things interesting. Good luck. Rings of circular cursing inflict the same curse upon you and someone else. This'll force you to get really inventive and customised, thinking up effects that'll be devastating for them but minor for you. Genius. The ring of gender confusion doubles the comedy by only making you think you've changed gender. This is easier to remove than the girdle, but has the potential for even more comedy. The ring of impact lets you hit harder. Another one that actually works exactly as it should. It's stuff like this that keep you coming back after all the mishaps. The Ring of kindness is another one you should put on others. Unless you're already saintly enough it makes no difference, you don't want to realise you've given all your stuff away to whoever asked for it. The ring of languages is another helpful but risky one. Do you want to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth, understandable by everyone? Ironic that such a scumbag should wind up producing items with drawbacks that are least troublesome to good guys. He also has three self-help books to tell you nothing you can't figure out yourself, and give you new spells with quite serious design defects. Course, you won't realise that until after spending the money, but such is life. Really, killing him and taking his stuff would work far better, presuming you can pull it off. Thousands of adventurers will thank you for it. Fuzzy Reviews: Oh man. This is like Clay-o-Rama's cuter big sister just bounced into the magazine. Fuzzy heroes is a wargaming ruleset which allows you to take nearly any toy, assign it stats based upon it's physical traits, and then have them fight. It has simple basic rules, but tons of optional advanced rules, and plenty of possible variants. The main complaint is that it's sample battles and setting assumes the same set of toys the author had, which probably will not be the case. Still, it seems perfect for introducing your kids to wargaming. April fool indeed. Fuzzy Sooper Heroes takes this idea and encourages you to mod your toys liberally. Add a cape & mask, and suddenly they get a whole bunch of cool extra abilities, and an interesting attempt to implement a moral code. This means that games involving sooper heroes are more likely to feature one-on-one fights and a certain degree of roleplaying, as players have to learn to play fair and get along OOC to make the chivalry point rules work. It all seems designed to segue neatly into playing full RPG's. This is one joke that definitely has serious applications.</blockquote>

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