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Lines I'd like to see Morrus put into his Gencon report
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<blockquote data-quote="Corran" data-source="post: 308123" data-attributes="member: 85"><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> Let's go to Gen Con!</p><p></p><p><strong>Piratecat:</strong> No! That's just what they'd expect us to do!</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><strong>Toadie:</strong> Sir, the Milwaukee hotels have stopped buying soap!</p><p></p><p><strong>Boss:</strong> That can mean only one thing: another Gen Con is neigh.</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><strong>Ryan Dancey:</strong> The d20 system is what gives a Gamer his power. It's an gaming system created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us. It binds the Gamers together.</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p>Hokey cards and ancient minis are no match for a good d20 at your side, kid.</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><strong>Ryan Dancey:</strong> The Other RPG Systems will no longer be of any concern to us. I have just received word that the Wizard of the Coast has dissolved the council permanently. The last remnants of the Old RPG Systems have been swept away. </p><p><strong>Game Designer:</strong> But that's impossible. How will the Wizard of the Coast maintain control without the bureaucracy? </p><p><strong>Ryan Dancey:</strong> The regional designers now have direct control over their games. Fear will keep the Other RPG Systems in line. Fear of this d20 System. </p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> I'm Morrus! I'm the guy from EN World! </p><p><strong>Peter Adkinson:</strong> You're who?</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><strong>Eric Noah:</strong> Gen Con Milwaukee. You will never find a more wretched hive of gamers and unwashed bodies. We must be cautious.</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><strong>Ryan Dancey:</strong> I find your lack of d20's disturbing.</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><em>Before the Ennies</em></p><p><strong>Eric Noah:</strong> This is not going to work. </p><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> Why didn't you say so before? </p><p><strong>Eric Noah:</strong> I did say so before!</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><em>Before the Ennies</em></p><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> What should we do if they discovere we have no awards? </p><p><strong>Eric Noah:</strong> Duck, and hope they don't have d20's. </p><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> That isn't very reassuring. </p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><em>After the Ennies</em></p><p><strong>Eric Noah:</strong> So, what did you think of it, Morrus? </p><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> I'm tryin' not to, Eric. </p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><strong>Anthony Valterra:</strong> Tweet, tear this convention apart until you've found those Natural 20 books. And bring me the designers, I want them alive!</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><em>Upon viewing the convention area</em></p><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> Look at the size of that thing. </p><p><strong>Eric:</strong> Cut the chatter, Morrus.</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><em>Phone rings, it's the hotelmanager.</em></p><p><strong>Hotelmanager:</strong> What happened? </p><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> Uh, we had a slight gaming malfunction, but uh... everything's perfectly all right now. We're fine. We're all fine here now, thank you. How are you? </p><p><strong>Hotelmanager:</strong> We're sending a cleaning squad up. </p><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> Uh, uh, negative. We had a d20 leak here now. Give us a minute to lock it down. Large leak, very dangerous. </p><p><strong>Hotelmanager:</strong> Who is this? Are you even registered as a guest? </p><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> Uh... </p><p><em>Throws the phone out of the window.</em></p><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> Boring conversation anyway.</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><em>After wiping out an entire party in one of his RPGA games.</em></p><p><strong>Piratecat:</strong> In my experience, there's no such thing as luck.</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><strong>Safe House doorman:</strong> Let me see your identification. </p><p><strong>Piratecat:</strong> You don't need to see their identification. </p><p><strong>Safe House doorman:</strong> We don't need to see their identification. </p><p><strong>Piratecat:</strong> These aren't the adventurers you're looking for. </p><p><strong>Safe House doorman:</strong> These aren't the adventurers we're looking for. </p><p><strong>Piratecat:</strong> They can go about their business. </p><p><strong>Safe House doorman:</strong> You can go about your business. </p><p><strong>Piratecat:</strong> Move along. </p><p><strong>Safe House doorman:</strong> Move along, move along.</p><p></p><p>-----------------------------</p><p></p><p><strong>Morrus:</strong> YAHOOOOO, Al, now let's blow this place and go home!</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Corran, post: 308123, member: 85"] [B]Morrus:[/B] Let's go to Gen Con! [B]Piratecat:[/B] No! That's just what they'd expect us to do! ----------------------------- [B]Toadie:[/B] Sir, the Milwaukee hotels have stopped buying soap! [B]Boss:[/B] That can mean only one thing: another Gen Con is neigh. ----------------------------- [B]Ryan Dancey:[/B] The d20 system is what gives a Gamer his power. It's an gaming system created by all living things. It surrounds us and penetrates us. It binds the Gamers together. ----------------------------- Hokey cards and ancient minis are no match for a good d20 at your side, kid. ----------------------------- [B]Ryan Dancey:[/B] The Other RPG Systems will no longer be of any concern to us. I have just received word that the Wizard of the Coast has dissolved the council permanently. The last remnants of the Old RPG Systems have been swept away. [B]Game Designer:[/B] But that's impossible. How will the Wizard of the Coast maintain control without the bureaucracy? [B]Ryan Dancey:[/B] The regional designers now have direct control over their games. Fear will keep the Other RPG Systems in line. Fear of this d20 System. ----------------------------- [B]Morrus:[/B] I'm Morrus! I'm the guy from EN World! [B]Peter Adkinson:[/B] You're who? ----------------------------- [B]Eric Noah:[/B] Gen Con Milwaukee. You will never find a more wretched hive of gamers and unwashed bodies. We must be cautious. ----------------------------- [B]Ryan Dancey:[/B] I find your lack of d20's disturbing. ----------------------------- [I]Before the Ennies[/I] [B]Eric Noah:[/B] This is not going to work. [B]Morrus:[/B] Why didn't you say so before? [B]Eric Noah:[/B] I did say so before! ----------------------------- [I]Before the Ennies[/I] [B]Morrus:[/B] What should we do if they discovere we have no awards? [B]Eric Noah:[/B] Duck, and hope they don't have d20's. [B]Morrus:[/B] That isn't very reassuring. ----------------------------- [I]After the Ennies[/I] [B]Eric Noah:[/B] So, what did you think of it, Morrus? [B]Morrus:[/B] I'm tryin' not to, Eric. ----------------------------- [B]Anthony Valterra:[/B] Tweet, tear this convention apart until you've found those Natural 20 books. And bring me the designers, I want them alive! ----------------------------- [I]Upon viewing the convention area[/I] [B]Morrus:[/B] Look at the size of that thing. [B]Eric:[/B] Cut the chatter, Morrus. ----------------------------- [I]Phone rings, it's the hotelmanager.[/I] [B]Hotelmanager:[/B] What happened? [B]Morrus:[/B] Uh, we had a slight gaming malfunction, but uh... everything's perfectly all right now. We're fine. We're all fine here now, thank you. How are you? [B]Hotelmanager:[/B] We're sending a cleaning squad up. [B]Morrus:[/B] Uh, uh, negative. We had a d20 leak here now. Give us a minute to lock it down. Large leak, very dangerous. [B]Hotelmanager:[/B] Who is this? Are you even registered as a guest? [B]Morrus:[/B] Uh... [I]Throws the phone out of the window.[/I] [B]Morrus:[/B] Boring conversation anyway. ----------------------------- [I]After wiping out an entire party in one of his RPGA games.[/I] [B]Piratecat:[/B] In my experience, there's no such thing as luck. ----------------------------- [B]Safe House doorman:[/B] Let me see your identification. [B]Piratecat:[/B] You don't need to see their identification. [B]Safe House doorman:[/B] We don't need to see their identification. [B]Piratecat:[/B] These aren't the adventurers you're looking for. [B]Safe House doorman:[/B] These aren't the adventurers we're looking for. [B]Piratecat:[/B] They can go about their business. [B]Safe House doorman:[/B] You can go about your business. [B]Piratecat:[/B] Move along. [B]Safe House doorman:[/B] Move along, move along. ----------------------------- [B]Morrus:[/B] YAHOOOOO, Al, now let's blow this place and go home! [/QUOTE]
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