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<blockquote data-quote="DM Howard" data-source="post: 6858198" data-attributes="member: 87131">Hi Moze,I took the opportunity to take a gander at The Festival of Light.&nbsp; First off, I would like to say that I think the actual content of the adventure is solid and I don't see any problems in it by just reading through it, and the premise works.&nbsp; That being said, as someone who does graphic design for a large portion of his day job here are a few things that I noticed (these are all friendly suggestions):<ul>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">You need to leave more space between paragraphs, titles, subtitles, and well pretty much everything.&nbsp; The content feels very &quot;crammed&quot; for lack of a better word.</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">The art you are using is OK, but there are places where I feel like you placed some art just for the sake of it and it adds to the cluttered feel of the document.</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">Change the color of the read aloud boxes to something else.&nbsp; That light green does not work very well on the sepia you have chosen to use.&nbsp; Perhaps a light blue to make it pop?</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">Rethink some of the content layout for ease of readability.&nbsp; For instance, page 6 feels disjointed with Battle Tactics and Battle preparation where they are and then the skeletons chart feels like an afterthought down at the bottom of the page.</li>
</ul>
<ul>
<li data-xf-list-type="ul">Lastly, I am not of the fan of the battle map design style you have gone for.&nbsp; I'd rather have clean, crisp maps than what you have presented here. (Personal opinion).</li>
</ul>Hopefully some of this helps.&nbsp; I like this adventure, but I wouldn't pay for it as it is right now.&nbsp; Just reading it gave me a little bit of a headache.&nbsp; Don't take any of what I have said too personally as I still think this is a great adventure, and you don't see me publishing any of my work.&nbsp; Keep it up! <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile&nbsp; &nbsp; :)"&nbsp; data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" /></blockquote>

[QUOTE="DM Howard, post: 6858198, member: 87131"] Hi Moze, I took the opportunity to take a gander at The Festival of Light. First off, I would like to say that I think the actual content of the adventure is solid and I don't see any problems in it by just reading through it, and the premise works. That being said, as someone who does graphic design for a large portion of his day job here are a few things that I noticed (these are all friendly suggestions): [LIST]You need to leave more space between paragraphs, titles, subtitles, and well pretty much everything. The content feels very "crammed" for lack of a better word.[/LIST] [LIST]The art you are using is OK, but there are places where I feel like you placed some art just for the sake of it and it adds to the cluttered feel of the document.[/LIST] [LIST]Change the color of the read aloud boxes to something else. That light green does not work very well on the sepia you have chosen to use. Perhaps a light blue to make it pop?[/LIST] [LIST]Rethink some of the content layout for ease of readability. For instance, page 6 feels disjointed with Battle Tactics and Battle preparation where they are and then the skeletons chart feels like an afterthought down at the bottom of the page.[/LIST] [LIST]Lastly, I am not of the fan of the battle map design style you have gone for. I'd rather have clean, crisp maps than what you have presented here. (Personal opinion).[/LIST] Hopefully some of this helps. I like this adventure, but I wouldn't pay for it as it is right now. Just reading it gave me a little bit of a headache. Don't take any of what I have said too personally as I still think this is a great adventure, and you don't see me publishing any of my work. Keep it up! :) [/QUOTE]

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