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<blockquote data-quote="Rel" data-source="post: 1967259" data-attributes="member: 99"><p>W3rd.</p><p></p><p>Another specific thing came to mind that my wife and I discussed recently: Give your spouse the benefit of the doubt. Always.</p><p></p><p>If you ask, "How about I cook pork chops for dinner tonight." and they respond, "I'm more in the mood for chicken I think." then it probably doesn't mean, "I think your cooking sucks and I never want to eat it again!" What it probably means is that they were just more in the mood for chicken. Consider that before you start an argument about how unappreciated you are. Even if you're in a bad mood.</p><p></p><p>And, speaking of bad moods, if you're in one then hopefully your spouse will do things to try and comfort and make you feel better. If they don't then it probably doesn't mean, "I really don't care much about you and you probably deserve to feel like crap right now and that's why I'm not comforting you." It probably means that they just haven't recognized that you need a little extra TLC right now. The best policy (IMHO) is, right when you walk in the door, say, "Well, I'm in a bad mood." You'll get a better resonse that way rather than relying upon the time tested (and failed) method of hoping they guess what you're thinking. In my experience, women do that a bit more often than men.</p><p></p><p>What we men do on the other hand is to utterly fail to understand the difference between when our wives want something fixed and when they just want us to listen. When they say, "The darn Check Engine Light came on in my car on the way home and I'm concerned." it probably means that they want that fixed. When they say, "My boss is treating me like crap.", the correct response is probably not "Well, I'll just go kill him then. Be right back." She probably just wants you to listen and not to try and fix it.</p><p></p><p>IMPORTANT ADDENDUM: If any or all of the advice in this thread doesn't seem to work for you and your marriage is otherwise happy, don't try and fix it. Gaming and marriage are very much alike in one respect - If everybody is having fun then you are not doing it "wrong". Don't let anyone else tell you differently.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Rel, post: 1967259, member: 99"] W3rd. Another specific thing came to mind that my wife and I discussed recently: Give your spouse the benefit of the doubt. Always. If you ask, "How about I cook pork chops for dinner tonight." and they respond, "I'm more in the mood for chicken I think." then it probably doesn't mean, "I think your cooking sucks and I never want to eat it again!" What it probably means is that they were just more in the mood for chicken. Consider that before you start an argument about how unappreciated you are. Even if you're in a bad mood. And, speaking of bad moods, if you're in one then hopefully your spouse will do things to try and comfort and make you feel better. If they don't then it probably doesn't mean, "I really don't care much about you and you probably deserve to feel like crap right now and that's why I'm not comforting you." It probably means that they just haven't recognized that you need a little extra TLC right now. The best policy (IMHO) is, right when you walk in the door, say, "Well, I'm in a bad mood." You'll get a better resonse that way rather than relying upon the time tested (and failed) method of hoping they guess what you're thinking. In my experience, women do that a bit more often than men. What we men do on the other hand is to utterly fail to understand the difference between when our wives want something fixed and when they just want us to listen. When they say, "The darn Check Engine Light came on in my car on the way home and I'm concerned." it probably means that they want that fixed. When they say, "My boss is treating me like crap.", the correct response is probably not "Well, I'll just go kill him then. Be right back." She probably just wants you to listen and not to try and fix it. IMPORTANT ADDENDUM: If any or all of the advice in this thread doesn't seem to work for you and your marriage is otherwise happy, don't try and fix it. Gaming and marriage are very much alike in one respect - If everybody is having fun then you are not doing it "wrong". Don't let anyone else tell you differently. [/QUOTE]
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