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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Thornir Alekeg" data-source="post: 1967274" data-attributes="member: 15651">As other said, most of the advice here is very good.  As another 11 year veteran, I'll add that some of the advice that is put out as gospel; "NEVER do this, ALWAYS do that," may not be true for any one couple's marriage.  Keep that in mind whenever someone is giving you advice on your marriage.  What works for one couple may not work for you.Unlike some people, in my marriage, the issue most fought over is not money, it is time.  We don't keep separate accounts, money decisions are made together (my wife often deferring to me since I have a better sense for the budgeting, but I always explain the decision).  But when it comes to time, especially now that we have kids, that is where the stress builds up.  We both have so much to do, the kids need time, the house needs time, work, classes, there is little left for individual time and together time is often sacrificed for the greater need for sleep.  We try and do something before it reaches critical mass, but sometimes things boil over.Keep the communications going.  Recognize that when one of you says something hurtful to the other, it is probably because they are having a bad day and try not to retaliate (if this happens all the time, then there may be other issues).  Be sincere in apologizing and gracious in accepting apologies. Oh, and I would disagree about Mercule's  But that is another issue entirely.</blockquote>

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