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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Gwarthkam" data-source="post: 1023515" data-attributes="member: 1448">I'm very sorry to hear that, hang in there, and try to keep your spirits up. As long as you can see the beauty of this world I'm sure that it will support you through these dark times.These days even with a T4-cell count of 0 you would still be able to fight back, and the already good medical treatments are getting better every day.To be honest I was relieved when I saw your count was 10, I'm not sure why but I saw those 10 as a real asset for you, they are not just T4 lymphocytes, they are a living part of you, they are you.My thoughts go with you and your fight to regain control. Absorb all the positive that may meet you and don't hesitate to ask if you need help, asking for help is not a weakness, it is the strength of embrasing the world.I understand you are afraid of all this, it is a huge change to adjust to this new situation, it is a situation that you cannot completely control and it is difficult to understand how it works. Try to focus on the things you can control, and release the fear for what you cannot control.It is you who decide how you confront this, how you eat, how you think, how you feel, how you love, and how you fight.  These choices are within your power, take up those challenges and experience life.My thoughts and prayers go with you in this time of adjustment and gathering of strength.</blockquote>