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Message: <blockquote data-quote="nai_cha" data-source="post: 5341800" data-attributes="member: 92791">Okay, I'll bite.All right, so let's look at places where the population is mostly female gamers. Example: <a href="http://girlgamers.dreamwidth.org/" target="_blank">girlgamers | Recent Entries</a> (granted, it was more active when it was still on livejournal, but I suppose for purposes of discussion it'll do)On the front page, the posts are about:new members introducing themselves to the communityhow to handle problem playersdiscussions about sex and gender roles, especially wrt to gamingpreferences in play stylesopinions about combat mechanicsgame reviewsfunny or memorable gaming experiencesOh, look, it's pretty much what you'd find here! Except yeah, there aren't posts on how to behave around guys. When gender is being discussed (in girlgamers and other female gamer focused blogs, communities, etc) it's more in the context of how women are portrayed, how to deal with sexist behaviour, &c &c.There IS a difference between men and women in gaming, but I don't think it's in play styles or preferred settings or genres or anything like that. (See: reams of anecdata that everyone has about how their guyfriend prefers this and their girlfriend prefers that.) It's in how some male players treat women gamers. I'm lucky enough not to have bad experiences when it comes to gaming with guys (OTOH, I have plenty bad experiences when it comes to going to the FLGS, but that's another matter), because all the boys and men I've gamed with -be it tabletop, card, console, PC, board, whatever- are used to having girls and women playing with them. It's nothing special. We grew up with it. So there was never "ohnoez a girl what do I do" or "I'll be totally creepy and inappropriate toward my female co-player."Female gamers who do have bad experiences, though, report it's because of the way male players deal with them. It's usually one or more of the following:(1) The above mentioned being creepy and inappropriate(2) Being talked down to (aka mansplaining), especially when it comes to mechanics(3) Having concerns about sexism, inappropriate behaviour, etc being diminished or dismissed ("LOL don't be so sensitive")It's the last, especially, that makes the differences between how some male players treat female players vs their fellow male players really clear. When it comes to having problems with male players: "sit down and talk to them in a mature fashion"  or "get a discussion going." With female players: "don't be so sensitive" or "you're just looking for something to be offended by" or "eh, boys will be boys." (that one, especially, is a disservice to both women AND men)*disclaimer 1: I don't want nor claim to speak for all women gamers. This is just what I've observed when other women gamers air their concerns.*disclaimer 2: neither do I want to say that the men on this board all engage in douchebag behaviour like I described above. Just that there are gamers that are condescending toward women and not toward men.</blockquote>

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