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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Uller" data-source="post: 714530" data-attributes="member: 413">Changing the behavior of a player is (usually) about as likely as changing the weather.  If like to go on picnics and it is always raining where you live, then you need to either learn how to cook in the rain or find another pastime.I would guess that she sees D&D exactly the way she sees any traditional game: Monopoly, Risk, Trivial pursuit...the point is to "win".  In D&D, "winning" to such a player usually involves being the most powerful or at least beating up on the monsters.   I enjoy this to an extent myself...I like coming up with interesting combinations of powers, skills, magic items, feats, etc and using them to great effect in combat or other exciting situations.  To me that is the whole point of leveling up and keeping track of XP (but I also like good role-playing).My suggestion is that you talk to her and the DM about it.  Let them both know why you play and what you want out of the game (as if they don't know already) and then drop it...either accept the play styles of others in your group and learn to enjoy the game despite these differences or find another group.The tastes in my game range from a former Magic the Gathering player who playes D&D exactly like he's playing Magic to a player who was told to make a 15th level character for a one-shot dungeon crawl and made an 80-year-old human fighter with an 8 con and 11 strength and wore bronze breast plate armor and carried a shortsword and a lance as his weapons.  I tried explaining to him that the one-shot was going to be a dungeon-crawl/hack n' slash game and that he should make his character more "appropriate" for that, but he'd hear none of it.  He was nearly killed in almost every battle...So normally I have to strike a balance between power-gaming and role-playing to satisfy all these tastes.   My players must accept that a balance is being struck.  Your DM must also strike a balance...and you as a player must understand that he is doing his best to strike that balance (and having a pouty wife for one of your players makes that doubly difficult).  If the situation is intolerable...suggest a break from D&D and play Monopoly.</blockquote>

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