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<blockquote data-quote="Nork" data-source="post: 5493359" data-attributes="member: 59879">The best way to teach someone a life lesson is to teach it to yourself where the person you want to learn it is watching.Anything worth doing is something you are going to screw up ten times over before you get it right.&nbsp; Getting down on yourself for making a mistake doesn't make a lot of sense with that being the case.&nbsp; People can freak out before they learn this life lesson (well some people just do nothing but blame others or avoid anything hard).&nbsp; It sounds like your player is in that boat.When you make mistakes as a DM, stop and make note of them and be positive and iterative about addressing the mistake.&nbsp; Say &quot;oops, I screwed that up because of XYZ.&nbsp; I'll try and only screw it up half as badly next time around so my campaign will be twice as good!&quot; or &quot;Oh man, I'm still not totally liking how I'm handling this or that, but I feel like it went more smoothly than last time so I'm happy.&quot;&nbsp; People tend to do this self-correction process silently, but verbalizing it can help someone who hasn't learned that not only is it OK to screw up: it is expected.You want them to focus on adjusting fire, not on being perfect the first time.&nbsp; Complementing them on doing something right may simply put more pressure on them to want to avoid doing anything wrong.&nbsp; Letting them know that you screw up ALL THE TIME (just like everyone else), but that you are positive about it and just shrug and learn from your mistakes will hopefully let them realize that hey, they can screw up too as long as they adjust fire afterward.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Nork, post: 5493359, member: 59879"] The best way to teach someone a life lesson is to teach it to yourself where the person you want to learn it is watching. Anything worth doing is something you are going to screw up ten times over before you get it right. Getting down on yourself for making a mistake doesn't make a lot of sense with that being the case. People can freak out before they learn this life lesson (well some people just do nothing but blame others or avoid anything hard). It sounds like your player is in that boat. When you make mistakes as a DM, stop and make note of them and be positive and iterative about addressing the mistake. Say "oops, I screwed that up because of XYZ. I'll try and only screw it up half as badly next time around so my campaign will be twice as good!" or "Oh man, I'm still not totally liking how I'm handling this or that, but I feel like it went more smoothly than last time so I'm happy." People tend to do this self-correction process silently, but verbalizing it can help someone who hasn't learned that not only is it OK to screw up: it is expected. You want them to focus on adjusting fire, not on being perfect the first time. Complementing them on doing something right may simply put more pressure on them to want to avoid doing anything wrong. Letting them know that you screw up ALL THE TIME (just like everyone else), but that you are positive about it and just shrug and learn from your mistakes will hopefully let them realize that hey, they can screw up too as long as they adjust fire afterward. [/QUOTE]

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