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<blockquote data-quote="Alzrius" data-source="post: 9254003" data-attributes="member: 8461">And that's fine. Seriously, there's nothing wrong with sharing your experiences, and learning whatever you can from others. It's when you start saying that because someone else's experiences don't match with your own, they become worthy of criticism, that's when the issues arise.That's not a key difference, though. I'm not issuing any sort of flat-out statement that your way &quot;doesn't work,&quot; despite some people seeming to go out of their way to twist my statement regarding viability. Quite the contrary, the entire reason I've repeatedly emphasized my own experiences (which has also ruffled some feathers for reasons I still don't understand) was to make it explicit that I wasn't issuing any sort of declaration that your approach doesn't work. Just that there are a not-inconsiderable number of people for whom it doesn't, and that their reasons are valid, and don't deserve to be criticized.And I appreciate you saying that, but it's important to then recognize that these experiences aren't open to criticism from others. Personal opinions regarding likes and dislikes aren't a matter of being valid/right/etc.The reason I don't want to talk about specific examples is because that way leads back to the idea that those examples can be criticized, which is judgmental and gatekeep-y. The idea that you can learn something from someone else's experience doesn't mean that you can treat it your own as necessarily being something that others can learn from; whether or not they take anything away from your anecdotes and stories is up to them to decide, not you, and whatever they decide is equally valid.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Alzrius, post: 9254003, member: 8461"] And that's fine. Seriously, there's nothing wrong with sharing your experiences, and learning whatever you can from others. It's when you start saying that because someone else's experiences don't match with your own, they become worthy of criticism, that's when the issues arise. That's not a key difference, though. I'm not issuing any sort of flat-out statement that your way "doesn't work," despite some people seeming to go out of their way to twist my statement regarding viability. Quite the contrary, the entire reason I've repeatedly emphasized my own experiences (which has also ruffled some feathers for reasons I still don't understand) was to make it explicit that I wasn't issuing any sort of declaration that your approach doesn't work. Just that there are a not-inconsiderable number of people for whom it doesn't, and that their reasons are valid, and don't deserve to be criticized. And I appreciate you saying that, but it's important to then recognize that these experiences aren't open to criticism from others. Personal opinions regarding likes and dislikes aren't a matter of being valid/right/etc. The reason I don't want to talk about specific examples is because that way leads back to the idea that those examples can be criticized, which is judgmental and gatekeep-y. The idea that you can learn something from someone else's experience doesn't mean that you can treat it your own as necessarily being something that others can learn from; whether or not they take anything away from your anecdotes and stories is up to them to decide, not you, and whatever they decide is equally valid. [/QUOTE]

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