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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Hairy Minotaur" data-source="post: 4863971" data-attributes="member: 11574">A new AddictionSlyphwhisper was determined to outlast the enermancer, the gnome propped himself against the wall opposite the deranged fool and watched the madman shape his army of mud replete with splinter weapons and long dead grass kilts. Through two watches the gnome practiced the walk in his head, envisioned the blade slipping between the shoulder blades and wondered if the idiot would call it macaroni. The enermancer paid little heed to the lawn ornament and busied himself with making a formidable conversation piece. An hour into the last watch the enermancer proclaimed his work completed and wiping the dripping sweat from his brow he turned back to view the gate into the heart of the plane of fire, otherwise known as Lord Horatius’ campfire, at the restless bunch of outlaws and miscreants and smiled. He vowed to one day tell them the story of how planer energy is really a myth perpetrated by doppelgangers but that could wait a few more days. Slyphwhisper glared at the human redundancy and cursed the fact he’d let the night get away from him as he viewed the couple hours of sleep he would get as worse than no sleep at all and now he was going to be sitting up all night watching mud puppets getting sculpted. Lord Horatius was first to rise as his offering to the god of annoying brightness and uncomfortable warmth flickered out in a flood of wetness. Checking the fire and finding the bottom logs damp with some kind of liquid, the pyromaniac went into a cursing rage. Cursing Tethys and Gramps before he stepped into something wet and hearing the unmistakable sound of soggy dirt squishing under his boot, the hexblade traces the small rivulet of water to the beached whale being dehydrated before his very eyes.“Well done, moron you’ve managed to flood your own oven.” Lavendar remarks“You seem to like sticking your nose into places it should expect to get sliced off.” Lord Horatius replies“Doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate the irony of it all.” Lavender answers“Classic!” Slyphwhipser comments at the hexblade’s defeatLord Horatius smirks and retrieves a couple of the enermancer’s mud men and heads back to the dwindling fire. “Hey! Those are for protection; you can’t just waltz over here and deplete the south flank without compensating with the rest of your sides. What am I supposed to do if the gnome goes feral on us and starts using his rakshasa like agility to attack me from the south?” The enermancer complains“I’m sure you’ll cope, drink some of Gramps’ ale it helps the normal people cope, might be half as effective on you so I’d double the dosage.” Lord Horatius answersThe hexblade smashes the mud men together to create a mud wall for the sweat to trickle away from the fire.“Why not just move the fire to another spot, or move the whale closer to the beach?” Slyphwhisper offers“What? And accept defeat? Never! If I have to open a gate to the City of Brass to get this thing burning again, so help me I will do it!” Lord Horatius shoutsHelga snorts herself awake at the hexblade’s battle cry and turns over in her puddle, “Oh uh, I think I had too much to drink last night, and I seem to have a fever. I’m so hot. Whew!” The woman fans her face with her massive hands.“You’re fine Helga, hemorrhoid boy here got irritated when his beacon for the invading azer army was extinguished.” Discordia states“Oh, why are my clothes all sticky?” The large woman says as she picks herself up off the floor. “That’s nothing, you should try wearing a leather bodice so tight that when you sweat the salt water drains down between your bosoms and collects there, then it gets cold and you’ve got this temperature gradient thing happening, the mountain peaks are burning up while the valley is in an ice age. It’s the most fricking uncomfortable feeling in the world especially when you run and the water sloshes.” Discordia explains“I feel yucky, I need a shower” Helga complains“Covered!” Tethys shouts and creates gallons of water over the large woman’s head, snuffing out the fire in the process and creating a smoke signal the size a titan would use. The room is instantly blanketed in a thick mind numbing smoke. Gramps hacks himself unconscious as the rest of the party tries to gather their things in total darkness. Slyphwhisper feels his way along the wall until he reaches the door and tries to open it only to realize it’s locked. Fumbling through his pouches, Slyphwhisper locates a set of bent metal pins he uses to act as if he really knows how to pick a lock. Slyphwhisper however hides a secret as he has the unfortunate ability to cause mechanical objects to fail when he operates them. Sometimes this results in an unfortunate circumstance, other times it performs as it does this time as the entire locking mechanism disengages from the door and falls out into the hallway beyond. “I can’t see anything! Who dropped the smokestick in the room?” Discordia’s voice rings above the din“Soldiers attack!” The enermancer screams and starts launching mud men at the locked doors and the wall adjacent to the doors.“I gotta get outta here!” Helga grunts and bull rushes the doors.Sylphwhisper hears the stampede of water buffalo behind him and moves to one side of the door, he then grabs a piton out from his backpack and as the Sphere of Food Annihilation comes rumbling through the door, the gnome sticks out the piton and trips the large woman. Helga bursts through the double doors and slams face first into the wall opposite the doors in the hallway. The force of her attack on the doors causes them to swing all the way open and then quickly rebound on their hinges. The doors close again as Helga falls backwards unconscious and lands on the doors, wedging them shut against her wide girth. Tethys drags Gramps behind her as she joins the enermancer, Discordia and Lavender at the door. Lord Horatius stands over the remains of the fire and tries valiantly to restart the conflagration. Slyphwhisper tires to escape but finds the doors immobile now. The rest of the party begins pushing on the doors and they creak and groan under the top heavy force against the human doorstop. Lavender flails around for the door handle and finds the hole Slyphwhisper’s machinations created. She reaches through and while searching for the exterior handle, comes up with a handful of greasy hair instead. “Something’s blocking the door and keeping us in here to smother to death! I think it’s a troll!” Lavender announces. “Let me see!” Tethys replies and drops Gramps to bend down at the opening in the door, through the smoke billowing out from inside the room, Tethys can faintly make out the top of a head resting against the door. Shoving her lithe hand through the hole, she takes aim and fires off two magic missiles into the head. The force of the blast knocks Helga’s head to one side and it lolls there, “I killed it!” Tethys rejoices.The door however still won’t budge, Lavender comes up with a plan and the women grab one side of Gramps while the enermancer and Slyphwhisper grab the other. Using Gramp’s plated helmet and head as a battering ram they begin to beat the door down. The door cracks under the pressure and the quintet double their efforts to get through the door as the room behind them erupts in a blaze of victory as the hexblade howls with glee over his triumph of the soggy logs. The women scream and shove Gramps into the door one final time and the right side of the entry snaps in half spilling the party out into the hallway and over the cataleptic Helga. The party regroups as Slyphwhisper plops down next to the startled Helga. Mistaking Slyphwhisper’s exhaustion as a friendly boost up, Helga plants one of her leviathan meat hooks on the gnome’s head. Ignoring the screaming and arms flailing, Helga wrenches herself up to a standing position as Slyphwhisper’s back and neck becomes an accordion of fractured bones and torn tendons. “Ouch” Slyphwhisper managed to say before passing out. He wakes up an hour later as the party is arguing whether or not to camp outside the temple or press on in search of the baron’s daughter. Lord Horatius wins out after assuring the party if they can try just one more door he’ll only make the fire visible from the next county over as opposed to being visible from space. Choosing the fancy double doors by the entrance, the party steels themselves for a fight. Gramps slowly inches the door open and the sounds of a dog barking and a something else in pain issue from the crack in the door. “Quickly, open the door Gramps that could be the girl we’re looking for!” Lavender pleads. Lord Horatius shoves the door open above Gramp’s head, throwing the dwarf off balnce and he falls into the room. What was once a great cathedral has been desecrated and taken over by the gnolls. A crude altar of stone sits in the back of the room, a large female gnoll with a wicked looking cat-o-nine-tails stands ready to deliver another thrashing to a chained female prisoner on the altar. Throwing assessment to the wind, Lavender throws her healing hand outward towards the chained prisoner and connects as the gnoll’s flail slams across the chest of the prisoner. “No, please. Mercy, Mercy!” The woman cries “There is no mercy for the trespassing and weak!” The gnoll barks and connects with the prisoner just as Lavender’s healing bolt arrives.“No!” *Crack* “YES! Hit me again!”Confused the gnoll pauses and observes the squirming human quizzically.“Uh oh, looks like in my adrenalized state, I amped up my healing bolt into uncharted ecstasy levels.” Lavender commentsDiscordia bolts for the other side of the room as Slyphwhisper ghosts his way down the opposite side of the room. Gramps stands to his feet, flanked by the enermancer and Lord Horatius , while Tethys pines for wilderness help for the battle that is about to take place.The gnoll priestess power grips the flail with both hands and brings it to bear on the writhing prisoner. Instinctively Lavender throws another bolt of healing at the human female.“Oh God! YES! Hit me harder! I want it! I need you to hit me! Come on you upright canine piece of trash. Whip me like the infidel that I am!” The prisoner screams“Crap.” Lavender commentsThe gnoll is now thoroughly confused and stops to check the instrument of her torture for defects, as she focuses her attention on the flail, both Slyphwhisper and Discordia flank her and cut down the gnoll easily. Discordia grabs the flail and points out the other magical objects on the gnoll’s body for Slyphwhispwer to relieve the corpse of. “Hey, tiefling. Psst.” The chained prisoner calls. Discordia turns to face the woman.“I’ll get you out of there in just a moment.” Discordia answers and then returns to cherry picking through the gnoll’s possessions“Hey wench, focus on the living you twisted freak!” The prisoner rankles Discordia“What did you say?” Discordia inquires her blood temperature rising“Oh, did I say something bad? Why don’t you come over her and whip me for being bad?” The prisoner pleads“Fine, you want it you got it.” Discordia answers and whips the tar out of the prisoner.The prisoner’s screams of pain and terror fill the room, Lavender looks up to see Discordia hammering away at the nude captive with the flail and recognizing that the screams are not in ecstasy but in pain and fear, throws another healing bolt at the prisoner and makes a dash for Discordia yelling at the warlock to stop beating the prisoner.Discordia hears Lavender’s pleas and ceases her beat down of the chained captive. The men in the party stare uncomfortable at Discordia after the prisoner squirms in her chains and arches her back.“Why did you stop! Hit me again you worthless half of a giant demon dropping, soulless womb of eternal stupidity!” The prisoner screamsDiscordia raises the flail again but Lavender reaches her and stays her hand.“What? Get away from her wench! She needs to finish what she started!” The captive cries“No, I’ve got to think of how to best handle this dilemma. It might take awhile; I believe I short circuited her brain into associated horrible pain and suffering as intense waves of pleasure from my healing powers. I may have broken her mind.”  Lavender explainsHelga finally reaches the fray with Tethys in tow.“You! El Lardo, smack me around. I’ve been a bad girl and I need to be punished, whip me like an orc between you and a stack of crème filled cakes with syrup and icing and whi…” Helga’s ham fist flew into an involuntary rage from the perceived withholding of food and slammed the head of the captive from the side, dislocating the prisoner’s jaw and wrenching her neck sideways.“ow… where’s the ecstasy?” The prisoner mutters before passing out on the cold stone altar on a pool of her own sweat and fluids. Tethys tends to the chained captive while the rest of the party frees a group of prisoners lined up in a hallway adjacent to the altar room each one awaiting their torturous death at the hands of the gnoll priestess. The party learns that these captives are from an armed caravan that was waylaid two nights ago about a mile south of the temple. The gnolls had taken Captain Ettaire to torture first in hopes of breaking the rest of them, her distorted shouts of pain and ecstasy had frightened all of them into thinking their torture would go on for hours. None of them had seen any other prisoners but that had heard the gnolls mention another group of prisoners that the drow might like instead. The able-bodied of the group were happy to don their equipment again and join in the battle to slaughter the remaining gnolls in the temple. The merchants fled to the entryway and barred the door from the inside and waited for what they hoped would be a victorious return. Captain Ettaire was healed and returned to consciousness. Where she promptly begged to be beaten like a cur, disturbing her former band mates and merchants alike, Lavender calmed her down and assured her that no one was going to beat her and that it was a side effect of the whip and that it would pass. Captain Ettaire elected to go with the group to hunt the rest of the gnolls with hate in her eyes. A few hours later with no luck in finding any other prisoners or gnolls the group ran across a couple of retreating gnolls who fled around a corner and disappeared. They redoubled their efforts in finding a secret passage and Slyphwhisper came through. As the gnome and dwarf worked together to find the unlocking mechanism, Captain Ettaire approached Discordia.“You whipped me like you knew what you were doing, as if you had handled that kind of situation before.” A Captain Ettaire started; sweat pouring down her forehead as she tried to control the trembling her body was wracking her resolve with. “What’s your point? I can’t whip you anymore; you’ll need to find another outlet for your new fetish.” Discordia explains.“Do you have anything sharp you could casually run across my body while applying pressure?” Captain Ettaire begs“Yes, but I have a nasty habit of removing organs and spines with it. Best to move along.” Discordia says and moves up to join the rest of the pack as Tethys brings up the rear of the people train and encounters the twitchy captain.The gnome and dwarf figure out the hidden latch for the secret door and get it open to reveal a long hallway with an enormous fresco of a human head at the near end of the hallway. The floor of the hallway seems to be covered in very fine sand, several inches deep.  At the other end of the hallway is a large fresco of an armed human warrior. “Well, they went down there somehow, lets keep pressing.” Slyphwhisper announces much to the joy of the rest of the group. The expanded party moves into the hallway, the light from behind them dims as bodies crowd the secret door, blanketing the corridor in twilight. Lavender gets a tap on the shoulder, “Psst, Lavender. Can you come back this way for a moment?” Tethys whispersLavender heads back up the corridor outside of the secret door and finds Captain Ettaire prone on the ground, her Cuirass slashed open in front and a bleeding wounds skate across her chest. “What the hell did you do?” Lavender screeches and races to heal the Captain“We were playing a game called connect the dots, I went first and She told me to connect all the freckles on her chest with this little metal stick here.” Tethys replies holding up the object.“That’s a dagger you moron, you cut her all up.” Lavender says and pours healing into Captain Ettaire The Captain’s eyes flutter open and she grabs Lavender and pulls her onto her chest, “More! More! Give it all to me! I feel it!”Lavender pries herself from the captain’s grasp, “Pull yourself together, I will not indulge you in this addicted destructive persona. I admit my role in its creation but I shall not continue to feed it.” Lavender explains and walks away.“Oh! It was supposed to be mine turn next. That’s not fair!” Tethys pouts as Captain Ettaire squirms on the floor, a far off look in her eyes and an idiot’s grin across her mouth.  "What do you make of this?" Slyphwhisper asks Gramps while pointing at the layer of sand in the hallway."Obviously we're near a portal to the demi-plane of beaches, watch out for hermit crabs. Dude" The enermancer interjects himself into the gnome and dwarf's conversation, "see no danger here." The enermancer stated as he advanced down the hallway. As he reached the midpoint of the hallway, the face fresco distorted and opened its mouth wide. A rush of air sound began race up the carving's mouth. Two stone minotaurs emerged along with a blast of air that stirred up the fine sand, blocking vision, making speech impossible and burrowing its way into every open crack and crevasse of the party in the hallway. The air picked up speed and begin to push the enermancer over the sandy floor as if he were skating. As he neared the far end of the hallway the large human fresco animated and waited for him to come within reach of its massive stone sword.</blockquote>

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