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Message: <blockquote data-quote="the Jester" data-source="post: 1707437" data-attributes="member: 1210">The Buzzing Bowels1 p.m., 5/23/368 O.L.G., on the edge of the Buzzing Fens, Strogass“Oh, at last!” moans Federico.  He’s shaking with fatigue; it has taken all his meager strength* to push through the muck, and now at last he can see the ground ahead is rising out of the swamp.  He swats half-heartedly at the cloud of gnats that’s encircling him and grumbles, “This sucks.  Ninety percent of all marshes suck.”“Almost there, dog,” gasps Sandy, but he doesn’t look so well.  It’s a warm day and the stinking air around the fens is full of moisture, but sweat is running in rivers from his face.  He’s starting to shake, too.  It seems that Sandy has caught something, either from the gasses or the bugs or the water or something.  And he’s not alone.  Lita is flagging, the same sweaty glazed look in her eyes.  Ed and Trinia don’t look too good either.The two humans lead the way as the ground gradually rises and becomes more solid, and then they’re at the first hill.  Laodegan and Thelonious pull the others laboriously from the mucky ground and the group collapses on the hillside.  “Be right back,” groans Sandy, and he lurches to his feet and swiftly walks behind a screen of nearby bushes.  He’s running when he’s halfway there, a screwed-up look of concentration on his face, then drops out of sight.  A moment later, he returns, lacing up his trousers, but minutes later he’s back behind the bush- and the other sick ones are in similar straits.“I recognize this,” Thelonious says.  “I think they’ve come down with the buzzing bowels.  It’s a disease native to the Fens.  They’re going to be... fairly incapacitated until they throw it off.  Uh, we’ll probably here a weird kind of flapping or buzzing noise sometimes when they, er, uh, when they’re indisposed.”“Is it fatal?” Laodegan asks.  Lita is struggling to her feet and stumbling behind the bushes.“Not usually, but they won’t be able to travel very well, and they’ll be, uh, indisposed a lot.  They’ll need a lot of fluids, but they’ll have a lot of trouble eating.  Ah, that’s the noise I was talking about.”The group soon sinks into unconsciousness, worn out by days of poor sleep in boats with no room to lie out.  The sick people- and it seems like only Martini, Jawbreaker, Federico and the humans have escaped the ravages of the buzzing bowels.  When they wake that night, the two humans go foraging for food and herbs along with Brother He’s dog, which Thelonious seems to be trying to adopt. His bow is at the ready; it seems likely that there’s some sort of game somewhere around here.Apparently, to some creatures, they are the game.  Three humanoid reptiles, as tall as them, rush at them from the side of the hill.  Both of the humans spot them, and Thelonious instantly reacts to take advantage of the fact that his bow is in his hands.  He fires an arrow directly into the lead lizard man’s torso, and the reptile hisses and roars.  It keeps coming, though, so he shoots it again and again.  The last arrow goes wide as the enemy charges forward.  Laodegan readies his sword and shield and assumes a fighting stance; it’s clear that he’s a well-trained warrior.  The lizard men arrive, screaming and hissing, and Laodegan swings his green-glowing sword but misses.  The monster that he’s dancing with slashes at him with its claws and wounds him, gouging his cheek; then it strikes him again on the left arm and tears a rent down it, ripping his shield off in the process!***  “Aargh!” Laodegan yells, and the beast steps in and bites his shoulder!“Let him go!” Thelonious shouts, but he’s being assaulted by an enemy of his own- an enemy already holding two arrows in his body.  Gritting his teeth, Thelonious takes a step back and fires an arrow.  With a zisp! it sinks deep into the lizard man’s chest, and it drops.  The ranger spins and fires a shaft at the one engaging Laodegan.  Unfortunately, Laodegan is between Thelonious and the target- and the arrow strikes him square in teh back instead of hitting the lizard man!  Already badly wounded, Laodegan cries out and falls face down in the grass, unconscious.“Sorry!” cries Thelonious, and keeps firing.  The one that was engaging Laodegan is an open shot now, and two arrows find its chest easily enough.  It coughs a great gout of blood out and falls.The final one lurches forward, having spent a few moments disabling the dog, and Thelonious lands a shaft in the side of its leg.  It hisses and rushes him, tearing at his arm.  He staggers back and fires again, but his arrows go wide.  Behind it, he sees Laodegan drag himself to his feet.  With a glare, he charges the last lizard man, impaling it on the blade of Cleansing.  The monster screams as Thelonious keeps backpedaling and firing arrows into it.  Finally it falls. “Whew!  That was close!” Thelonious cries.  “Sorry about shooting you- why don’t you come over here so I can dig that arrow out?”  He wipes his brow.  “Wow, I don’t feel so hot.  I think I’m coming down with something...”8:30 a.m., 5/24/368, the Brown HillsLaodegan straps his sword belt on firmly.  “Well, your Asylum is somewhere in these hills, and good luck to you.  I have a job to do.  It’s been interesting.”  Shouldering his pack, he strikes off south.****  “Good luck,” Martini calls back.  He shakes his head.  I can’t believe he left before second breakfast.Martini, Jawbreaker and Federico help the sick members of the group into a sheltered copse of trees and then discuss their next move.  Jawbreaker climbs a tree and grunts, then shuffles down it.  “Building,” he says, and points.“How far?” Martini asks.  Jawbreaker shrugs, so the group heads in the direction he had indicated.  The sun is already bright; Federico puts on his motley cap and the group moves down one hill and starts up another, following the barbarian’s lead.  Suddenly, from a nearby bush, a tallfellow halfling- or a human child?- bursts out.*****  He’s wearing a smock and he has a goofy smile on his face.  “Yay, let’s play!” the tallfellow cries.  He looks childishly pleased with Federico’s hat.The kobold does a quick showy tumble.  “Hi there!” he says cheerfully.“Do you wanna play?”Federico looks at the- boy?  Halfling?  He has no weapons, no armor, nothing at all save a simple smock that sees to lace up the back.  “What are you doing out here with no protection?”“I just got away from the place.”Martini and Federico exchange a glance.  Martini meanders to the side and little and confirms a guess: the smock has no back.  It’s the kind of gown one gets in a hospital... or an asylum.“The Asylum?” asks the kobold.  “Are there doctors?”“Yeah... they were nice... but now there are mean people.”“What’s your name?” Martini asks.“Timothy,” the... lad... answers.“Are you a halfling, Timothy?” asks Martini, slightly puzzled by the child-like demeanor.  He looks like a halfling, yet...“I’m just a kid,” Timothy avows.“How old are you?”“Twenty-two,” the lad answers. There’s a moment of silence as the group considers.  Most humans are full-sized by twenty-two, that’s for sure.  He must be a halfling, thinks Martini, but he saves the discussion for another time.  “Well,” Federico finally says, “we’re going to go back to the place to free some people who are wrongly held there against their will.  Do you want to help us, Timothy?”“Um, I don’t like the place.”“Right!  And you know, having been in there, just how bad it is, and how much we should free the people imprisoned against their will!”“Um, I guess so.  Yeah, I want to help let people out.”“You said there were mean people there?” Martini interjects. “Yeah, bad people.  They were mean.”“Did they touch you in your no-no place?” Federico asks in horrified fascination.“They... they shocked me.”“Oh no!” the kobold exclaims.  “D-did they... were there chains?”“No, but sometimes they’d put me in the jacket.  Then you can’t move your arms.”  Timothy pauses.  “That’s what they do if you’re bad.”“Oh, poor Timmy!” exclaims Federico, and to his shock, Timothy starts rocking back and forth and moaning.“No, don’t say that!  Don’t say Timmy!  My name is Timothy!  Timothy!  I’m Timothy!”“Oh, no!  I’m sorry, it’s okay, it’s okay...” The three halflings try to console Timothy and slowly they bring him out of it with the aid of a fruit show put on by Federico.  Soon the lad is laughing and engaged again, but his face tends to a peculiar blankness much of the time.It’s time for lunch, our heroes realize.  They break out their rations.Next Time: What good is Timothy?  Has he any useful talents?  I guess we’ll see when- the dirt lobsters attack!*Federico, you should know, has a strength score of 1.**As mentioned previously, this is the excuse for the non-participation of the players who weren’t there for this session.  (Interestingly, this post spans two games, thus Thelonious and Laodegan.)  We pretty much hand wave this stuff, with just the barest nod to realism, but in this case the excuse comes up again in the (spoiler), and the disease itself came up again in our most recent game as well.  Those silly Buzzing Fens!  ***This was a crit; I have a ‘colorful critical hit’ system that has all kinds of fun effects on the victim, based on the severity of the crit.  This one did less than half of Laodegan’s present hp, so the added bonus couldn’t be too severe.****Unfortunately, due to some personal issues, Elder James hasn’t been able to play with us since this session.  In general, if a player is long-term absent I try to retrofit an explanation for where they’ve been- witness also Thelonious’ earlier absence after Bellhold around the time of the jam contest.*****Geez, tons of annotations this time.  Tallfellows in my game look just like a young human child.  Halflings can see the difference instantly, but most humans can’t, and one of the reasons the big folk tend towards prejudice against halflings is that tallfellows are notorious for taking advantage of the big folk by playing up on the child thing.  Let’s just say that Timothy’s background is very... interesting.</blockquote>

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