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<blockquote data-quote="the Jester" data-source="post: 2089351" data-attributes="member: 1210"><p><strong>The Return of Thelonious!</strong></p><p></p><p><em><strong>3 p.m., most of the way up the volcano</strong></em></p><p></p><p>Near the top of the mountain, Jawbreaker finds the lead our heroes need. “Tracks,” he grunts, and the group troops after him as he follows them along a loosely-soiled slope. Soon the group finds a doorway. Grulka and Dogtooth back away, leaving this part to the professionals, promising to wait outside. Grulka is beaming at her husband like he’s the biggest goblin hero of all time, except he’s a halfling and doesn’t really care about stupid goblins. Martini and Whisperclick move up next to the door and the ranger throws it open. </p><p></p><p>Unfortunately, a spray of flaming oil shoots out! Martini yelps in pain and surprise and the smell of burning skin and hair wafts over to the others. Naomi starts salivating. Whisperclick throws himself aside, managing to dodge away from the oil completely, but Martini ignites like a sheet of paper!</p><p></p><p>Beyond the doorway, hordes of rats start swarming out and towards our heroes. Martini, screaming as he burns, stops, drops and rolls, and the flames on him flicker and waver. Most of them die. He spasms and shrieks as he extinguishes the rest; meanwhile, Naomi directs a <em>swarm of crystals</em> The rats squeak and squeal as they are slain or dispersed. </p><p></p><p>The others help bat out the remaining flames on Martini. He gasps in pain, but stands ready to fight on. Beyond the door the party traipses through several claustrophobic rooms before finally arriving at another door. Again, Martini pushes it open- this time, half-expecting another trap, with a wince. But there is no trap.</p><p></p><p>Instead, her back to them, there is the beautiful female vampire our heroes fought once before. She is in the midst of a bedroom, standing before a mirror in which she throws no reflection. But our heroes do. Surely she can see them.</p><p></p><p>Martini rushes forward with a yell as Red steps in and his psychic blade extrudes from his hand. The others begin to push through the door as well.</p><p></p><p>Poised dramatically, the vampire spawn whirls and catches Whisperclick’s eyes with hers. She smiles a crimson smile, and the gnome’s eyes go blank. He whirls and attacks Naomi, who jumps back with a yelp. “Hey!” she shouts. </p><p></p><p>Meanwhile, Martini leaps forward with a great two-handed blow of his greatsword. He feels an eldritch resistance to his blow, and though it should have dropped a normal woman, she only grunts slightly. Then she leaps lithely on top of her bed and strikes at the charging Chief Jawbreaker. He yells, slamming his axe into the bed at her feet, but misses her legs; however, he throws her off-balance enough that she misses him too.</p><p></p><p>Whisperclick keeps trying to stab Naomi until she gives him a <em>psionic suggestion</em> to go kill the vampire. He swings away for a moment, torn by conflicting commands, and seems unable to make a decision.</p><p></p><p>Timothy hurls volleys of <em>magic missiles</em> at the she-vampire, then sets her bed alight with a <em>flaming sphere.</em> She leaps over Jawbreaker and swings at him again, but his armor takes the blow intended for his body. Martini thrusts in and stabs her again, then while she recovers he swings another mighty blow into her chest! Blood sprays all over the room, sizzling in the flames of the bed, even as Red cries out in dismay as his psychic blow fails to deal any damage to the woman that they’re fighting. Her mocking laughter taunts him. Then she whirls and lands a blow across Naomi, who winces as she feels her energy siphon away. The vampire’s wounds are healing noticeably.</p><p></p><p>“Ragh!” shouts Jawbreaker. He casts his axe down, lifts the flaming bed, and slams it into the vampiress, pinning her against the wall! “JAWBREAKER!!!!” he howls at the top of his lungs. She hisses, struggling against the raging barbarian’s strength, and suddenly Whisperclick steps in, stabbing harshly at the Chief. Jawbreaker howls in rage but keeps the vampire pinned long enough for Naomi to manifest a <em>swarm of crystals</em> on her. Then she dissolves into mist and reforms only an instant later, free of the burning bed. Jawbreaker lets it crash to the ground and scoops up his axe again, casually parrying another of Whisperclick’s stabs. “You stop,” he growls warningly at the gnome.</p><p></p><p>Then, suddenly, another <em>swarm of crystals</em> is all around him. It blasts Jawbreaker, Whisperclick and the vampire, and when his eyes clear, only he is still standing. </p><p></p><p>“Oh no!” cries Timothy, “Whisperclick!” He rushes to bind up the gnome’s wounds, saving his life- albeit barely.</p><p></p><p>“Quick, we need to find its coffin,” says Martini. “Everyone knows you need to stake a vampire in its coffin.” </p><p></p><p>It takes our heroes less than ten minutes to find the coffin in question. Within it, eyes closed, still as death, is the woman. A jagged wooden stake is quickly pounded into her chest. Her eyes bulge open for an instant, and then she is still.</p><p></p><p>“We’re pretty beat up,” gasps Naomi, limping from the stabs that Whisperclick had delivered to her. “Maybe we should go back to the goblin village in case there are more of them.”</p><p></p><p>“But the goblins told us that there was only one left,” Timothy objects.</p><p></p><p>“And it’s a hell of a climb,” Martini points out, wincing as he bandages his own wounds.</p><p></p><p>The party searches around but finds no sign of any other living (well, existing) vampire. Timothy, as the chief’s advisor, advises resting here; Jawbreaker announces his decision. “We camp here,” he tells his tribe.</p><p></p><p>***</p><p></p><p><em><strong>4/24/369 O.L.G., 8 a.m., the beach near the goblin village</strong></em> </p><p></p><p>“I wonder what all the commotion is this morning,” remarks Beau. </p><p></p><p>Woken a little early by a lot of goblin chatter, our heroes have trooped out to the beach to see what’s up. There is a body washed up on shore- a human! As our heroes watch, it twitches and moans, which sets the goblins to murmuring fiercely. A few have their spears cautiously readied. </p><p></p><p>“It can’t be,” murmurs Martini, “but I think it is- Thelonious?”</p><p></p><p>With a groan the human drags himself upright. “Martini?” he gasps. “Then you’re alive! I was so worried...” He nearly collapses. </p><p></p><p>“Let’s help him to the village,” Naomi snaps. “Some food will do us good.” She’s salivating again. “I mean, him.” She picks at her teeth.</p><p></p><p>Thelonious, it turns out, has been a few weeks behind our heroes for months. He reached Ulborey a few weeks after they did, and left a few days behind them. But then a hurricane came up- “We know the one you mean,” Naomi assures him- and his ship was dashed to splinters. “I feared the worst,” he groans. “So many of my clan have died- it’s terrible- I want to help protect you all, my adopted kinfolk.”</p><p></p><p>“Well, you’re just in time,” Timothy says. “The goblins are building us a boat... we’ll be leaving in a few days!”</p><p></p><p>“Thank the gods,” Thelonious sighs. “I was getting so tired of trying to catch up with you!”</p><p></p><p>“Well,” says Naomi, “you’ve caught up. Now don’t get killed or anything, or we’ll have to eat you!” She grins and chuckles as if joking.</p><p></p><p><em><strong>Next Time:</strong></em> A gnome on a rope! Will Whisperclick survive??</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="the Jester, post: 2089351, member: 1210"] [b]The Return of Thelonious![/b] [i][b]3 p.m., most of the way up the volcano[/b][/i][b][/b] Near the top of the mountain, Jawbreaker finds the lead our heroes need. “Tracks,” he grunts, and the group troops after him as he follows them along a loosely-soiled slope. Soon the group finds a doorway. Grulka and Dogtooth back away, leaving this part to the professionals, promising to wait outside. Grulka is beaming at her husband like he’s the biggest goblin hero of all time, except he’s a halfling and doesn’t really care about stupid goblins. Martini and Whisperclick move up next to the door and the ranger throws it open. Unfortunately, a spray of flaming oil shoots out! Martini yelps in pain and surprise and the smell of burning skin and hair wafts over to the others. Naomi starts salivating. Whisperclick throws himself aside, managing to dodge away from the oil completely, but Martini ignites like a sheet of paper! Beyond the doorway, hordes of rats start swarming out and towards our heroes. Martini, screaming as he burns, stops, drops and rolls, and the flames on him flicker and waver. Most of them die. He spasms and shrieks as he extinguishes the rest; meanwhile, Naomi directs a [i]swarm of crystals[/i] The rats squeak and squeal as they are slain or dispersed. The others help bat out the remaining flames on Martini. He gasps in pain, but stands ready to fight on. Beyond the door the party traipses through several claustrophobic rooms before finally arriving at another door. Again, Martini pushes it open- this time, half-expecting another trap, with a wince. But there is no trap. Instead, her back to them, there is the beautiful female vampire our heroes fought once before. She is in the midst of a bedroom, standing before a mirror in which she throws no reflection. But our heroes do. Surely she can see them. Martini rushes forward with a yell as Red steps in and his psychic blade extrudes from his hand. The others begin to push through the door as well. Poised dramatically, the vampire spawn whirls and catches Whisperclick’s eyes with hers. She smiles a crimson smile, and the gnome’s eyes go blank. He whirls and attacks Naomi, who jumps back with a yelp. “Hey!” she shouts. Meanwhile, Martini leaps forward with a great two-handed blow of his greatsword. He feels an eldritch resistance to his blow, and though it should have dropped a normal woman, she only grunts slightly. Then she leaps lithely on top of her bed and strikes at the charging Chief Jawbreaker. He yells, slamming his axe into the bed at her feet, but misses her legs; however, he throws her off-balance enough that she misses him too. Whisperclick keeps trying to stab Naomi until she gives him a [i]psionic suggestion[/i] to go kill the vampire. He swings away for a moment, torn by conflicting commands, and seems unable to make a decision. Timothy hurls volleys of [i]magic missiles[/i] at the she-vampire, then sets her bed alight with a [i]flaming sphere.[/i] She leaps over Jawbreaker and swings at him again, but his armor takes the blow intended for his body. Martini thrusts in and stabs her again, then while she recovers he swings another mighty blow into her chest! Blood sprays all over the room, sizzling in the flames of the bed, even as Red cries out in dismay as his psychic blow fails to deal any damage to the woman that they’re fighting. Her mocking laughter taunts him. Then she whirls and lands a blow across Naomi, who winces as she feels her energy siphon away. The vampire’s wounds are healing noticeably. “Ragh!” shouts Jawbreaker. He casts his axe down, lifts the flaming bed, and slams it into the vampiress, pinning her against the wall! “JAWBREAKER!!!!” he howls at the top of his lungs. She hisses, struggling against the raging barbarian’s strength, and suddenly Whisperclick steps in, stabbing harshly at the Chief. Jawbreaker howls in rage but keeps the vampire pinned long enough for Naomi to manifest a [i]swarm of crystals[/i] on her. Then she dissolves into mist and reforms only an instant later, free of the burning bed. Jawbreaker lets it crash to the ground and scoops up his axe again, casually parrying another of Whisperclick’s stabs. “You stop,” he growls warningly at the gnome. Then, suddenly, another [i]swarm of crystals[/i] is all around him. It blasts Jawbreaker, Whisperclick and the vampire, and when his eyes clear, only he is still standing. “Oh no!” cries Timothy, “Whisperclick!” He rushes to bind up the gnome’s wounds, saving his life- albeit barely. “Quick, we need to find its coffin,” says Martini. “Everyone knows you need to stake a vampire in its coffin.” It takes our heroes less than ten minutes to find the coffin in question. Within it, eyes closed, still as death, is the woman. A jagged wooden stake is quickly pounded into her chest. Her eyes bulge open for an instant, and then she is still. “We’re pretty beat up,” gasps Naomi, limping from the stabs that Whisperclick had delivered to her. “Maybe we should go back to the goblin village in case there are more of them.” “But the goblins told us that there was only one left,” Timothy objects. “And it’s a hell of a climb,” Martini points out, wincing as he bandages his own wounds. The party searches around but finds no sign of any other living (well, existing) vampire. Timothy, as the chief’s advisor, advises resting here; Jawbreaker announces his decision. “We camp here,” he tells his tribe. *** [i][b]4/24/369 O.L.G., 8 a.m., the beach near the goblin village[/b][/i][b][/b] “I wonder what all the commotion is this morning,” remarks Beau. Woken a little early by a lot of goblin chatter, our heroes have trooped out to the beach to see what’s up. There is a body washed up on shore- a human! As our heroes watch, it twitches and moans, which sets the goblins to murmuring fiercely. A few have their spears cautiously readied. “It can’t be,” murmurs Martini, “but I think it is- Thelonious?” With a groan the human drags himself upright. “Martini?” he gasps. “Then you’re alive! I was so worried...” He nearly collapses. “Let’s help him to the village,” Naomi snaps. “Some food will do us good.” She’s salivating again. “I mean, him.” She picks at her teeth. Thelonious, it turns out, has been a few weeks behind our heroes for months. He reached Ulborey a few weeks after they did, and left a few days behind them. But then a hurricane came up- “We know the one you mean,” Naomi assures him- and his ship was dashed to splinters. “I feared the worst,” he groans. “So many of my clan have died- it’s terrible- I want to help protect you all, my adopted kinfolk.” “Well, you’re just in time,” Timothy says. “The goblins are building us a boat... we’ll be leaving in a few days!” “Thank the gods,” Thelonious sighs. “I was getting so tired of trying to catch up with you!” “Well,” says Naomi, “you’ve caught up. Now don’t get killed or anything, or we’ll have to eat you!” She grins and chuckles as if joking. [i][b]Next Time:[/b][/i][b][/b] A gnome on a rope! Will Whisperclick survive?? [/QUOTE]
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