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Message: <blockquote data-quote="roguerouge" data-source="post: 4098423" data-attributes="member: 13855">That's really good.I'd start it off with saying, "I apologize. I know that I've been a bit cranky at the table and I'm sorry if it's been affecting you."Then shut up. Let her say whatever it is she wants to say to that. She'll likely say it's not a big deal and express surprise or apologize herself and express her frustration. Let that run its course. If the conversation continues, put everything in "I feel _____" terms. For example, "I feel anxious for my character when the combats are close. I feel like we need every advantage to survive. And that's why I do ______." Under NO circumstances should you say it's about her. Always put it in terms of THE SITUATION, which is not blaming but rather problem solving.THEN say, exactly "I love gaming with you, but I know that you struggle with the rules and I struggle with you struggling." And if you mess it up DO NOT mess up the "I love gaming with you" part.And then, and only then, do you ASK HER how she can help you with this issue. Have some options and let her choose what would help most.Remember: you are not going to fix her problem. You're helping to manage your own anxiety with this issue. Your anxiety is not going to go away because your solutions will only make the problem less frequent, not go away.</blockquote>