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Message: <blockquote data-quote="mhacdebhandia" data-source="post: 2763494" data-attributes="member: 18832">You're obviously a person who identifies strongly with her character.Given that, I can only add my voice to those who suggest that you take your feelings of having been betrayed, deceived, or cheated in some way, and channel them into motivating your character.It's perfectly understandable that your paladin would feel anguished that the town she defended was destroyed by a conspiracy that waited until she and her suspicious-of-the-conspirators friends left town. She would feel angry at herself for not doing more to uncover the plot, but more angry at the conspirators for what they've done to her friends and comrades in Camber.Don't push your feelings away - use them! Maybe your paladin even feels cheated by her god, who could have done more to guide her to preventing the tragedy. Resolving the conflict between such feelings of betrayal and her paladinic faith and calling sounds like a great opportunity for role-playing to me.I agree with those who suggest that the right thing for your paladin to do is stay in Camber, help it recover, and track down the conspirators to bring them to justice. This might mean that this character misses out on the journey to the Lake of Steam and Calimport - or it could mean another opportunity to stretch your roleplaying muscles and convince the rest of the party to aid you in your task.On a metagame level, you shouldn't ever play a game of D&D if you're not enjoying it. You obviously play at least partially for escapism - and if unpreventable tragedies on this scale aren't fun for you to deal with, and you don't think you can get any use out of my preceding advice because you're just too depressed by what's happened, then that is something that you should have communicated - and definitely should communicate as soon as possible - to the DM and to the other players in the group.Nearly every problem of this type could have been avoided if the group sat down and discussed the type of things they're comfortable with in a game and what they're not comfortable with - without judgement of any individual's preferences, mind you. If you don't want to have to deal with what amounts to a complete negation of the hard work you did to save Camber over the winter, even one you could have prevented, then the DM and the other people in your group should have known this from the start.It's okay for you to feel that way! I might not agree with you myself (and in fact, the scenario you outline is one I'd love to play through), but everybody gets something personal out of roleplaying. This preference of yours is exactly as reasonable as, say, a given DM's preference for running parties without evil or chaotic neutral characters, or a given gaming group's preference for Howard-and-Leiber-inspired fantasy rather than Tolkien-derived tropes, or whatever.The only hard fact you might have to face is that, husband or no, your DM (and the other players in the group, equally as importantly) may not be interested in playing on your terms. Incompatibility with a group you already play with is a hard thing to realise, more often than not, but if it turns out that no-one else has a problem with what's going on you might just have to accept that you can't have your ideal gaming experience in that group. Be prepared for that possibility.</blockquote>

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