Please can you check my monsters

Ferret

Explorer
Undervile
Large magical Beast
Hit-dice: 12d10+84 (150hp)
Initiative: 0
AC: 16 (+1 Dex, -1 size, +6 Nat. armour)
Attack: Bite +17 ; 2 tentacle+ 12; tail +12; elbow spike +12
Damage: 2 Tentacles 2d4+5 Bite 2d6+ 7 Tail 1d8+5 Elbow spike 1d2+5
Reach: 5 ft. by 5 ft. /10 ft.
Special attacks: Improved grab, Cleave, Greater cleave, Power attack
Special qualities: DR (10/+1), Endurance, Great fortitude,
Saves: Fort +15 Ref +8 Will +3
Abilities: Str 21(5) Dex 11(0) Con 24(7) Int 4(-3) Wis 8(-1) Cha 22(6)
Skills: Hide+2, Move silently+2 spot+4 listen+4
Feats: Improved critical, Weapon focus: Bite

Climate or terrain: Any land and underground
Organization: Solitary (1)
Challenge rating: TBA
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always evil
Advancement: None

An Undervile is a vile creature, it attacks devours any creature it can see, although it may retreat if seriously hurt.

Standing from 10-15 ft high, these gruesome creatures seemed to have come from other planes even though these are rumours, the it sprang from the underdark. It seems that nothing of this sort could be Toril born; both hands are squid like and have amazing grip, and crushing power. These octopi-appendages are 2 to 3 foot long and coated with a slimy substance. The mouth has 3 razor sharp talons around it also 3-4 foot long, which can undeniably crush metal, mounted close into the bone under the skin is a pair of beady red eyes, that disallow site towards the side. It has dinosaur-esque feet, 3 talons and a thumb; these feet are gigantic to keep the creatures balance, which it looses if it raises one to attack. Its skin is almost as hard as rock and any blows that get through are almost instantly ignored. It’s most distinguishing mark is the large (½-1 foot) spike on its elbow (Upper arm) which is rarely used in combat.

With special thanks to Kris

Plaze
Fine Ooze
Hit-dice: 1/8 d10 (1 Hp)
Initiative: 4(4+ dex)
Speed: 25 ft, swim 45
AC: 22 (+4 Dex, +8 size)
Attack: Slam +12
Damage: Slam 1-3
Reach: 1/2. /0 ft.
Special attacks:
Special qualities: Regeneration 1, Groove
Saves: Fort +0 Ref +4 Will -5
Abilities: Str 4(-3) Dex 19(4) Con 10(0) Int -- Wis 1 Cha 1
Skills: None
Feats: None

Climate or terrain: Any temperate or warm
Organization: Plague 60
Challenge rating: 1/2
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always Neutral
Advancement: 1/8 to 2 (diminutive)

They seem to be a joke, but after you see their numbers and speed, you won’t be laughing

Plaze, are small and green blobs of ooze, that multiple at phenomenal rates, no one knows how they came to be and no one cares.

Combat:
Plaze swarm and over run, they attack anything they can find wood, creatures, metal if it sees another object it will attack it, the only thing they will not attack are other oozes.

Special abilities:

Regeneration (Ex): Electricity deals normal damage to a Plaze.

Groove (Ex): whenever confronted with decent music (above DC 20), the Plaze immediately quivers with joy, stopping all aggressive action and just grooving until the music ceases (perform checks are required every round)

Dravern

Huge Dragon (Sonic)
Hit Dice: 16d12+14 (168 hp)
Initiative: +1 (Dex)
Speed: 20 ft., fly 30 ft. (Clumsy)
AC: 24 (-2 size, +1 Dex, +15 natural)
Attacks: bite +21 melee, Sting +12 melee, 2 wings +12 melee; or _2 claws +12 melee
Damage: Sting 1d6+3, bite 2d8+7, wing 1d8+7; or claw 1d6+3
Face/Reach: 10 ft. by 20 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks: Acid, improved grab, snatch
Special Qualities: Scent, damage reduction 5/+1, Sonics immunity, hover, Blind sight, Push off, Frightful presence
Saves: Fort +14, Ref +11, Will +11
Abilities: Str 24, Dex 13, Con 18, Int 12, Wis 12, Cha 12
Skills: Listen +20*, Move Silently +9 Spot +13*
Feats: Alertness, Flyby Attack, dodge, mobility
Climate/Terrain: Temperate and warm forest, hill, and mountains (Caves)
Organization: Solitary, pair, or flight (3-6)
Challenge Rating: 9
Treasure: Standard
Alignment: Often evil
Advancement: 16-20 HD (Huge); 18-23 HD (Gargantuan)
These are the malformed offspring of Wyvern and Black Dravern.

At a glance, it may pass as its Chromatic cousins, but after closer inspection, the subtle differences arise and it becomes apparent it is a hybrid. One of the most prominent differences is that the monsters scales twists and spikes shift sonic vibrations away from it, the wings are too small to carry it fast, although flight is possible. The usual poison in its tail is gone; the breeding with black Draverns has produced powerful acid in its place. As soon as you see its mouth, and the strange shape of its teeth, you realize
It must screech at its victims causing vibration that can rip apart flesh, knock a man out, or shatter stone.

Combat

Frightful Presence (Ex): A Dravern can unsettle foes with its mere presence. The ability takes effect automatically whenever the Dravern attacks, charges, or flies overhead. Creatures within a radius of 30 feet x 6 are subject to the effect if they have fewer HD than the Dravern.
A potentially affected creature that succeeds at a Will save (DC 10 + 1/2 Dravern’s HD + Dravern’s Charisma modifier) remains immune to that Dravern’s frightful presence for one day. On a failure, creatures with 4 or fewer HD become panicked for 4d6 rounds and those with 5 or more HD become shaken for 4d6 rounds. Draverns ignore the frightful presence of other Draverns.

Acid: The Dravern can use the acid on its tail to deal 4d4 damage

Breath weapon: A Dravern can blast sonic energy in a cone up to 80 feet long. It can tune the harmonics of this destructive power to affect different types of targets.
• Flesh: Disrupting tissue and rending bone, this horrible attack deals 10d6 points of damage to all within the cone (Reflex half DC 20) and have a chance to be deafened permanently (Fortitude 25) If they made the Reflex save they need not take the Fort save.

• Nerves: The Dravern can knock out an opponent that does not make their Fortitude save (DC 30) and their Reflex save (DC 15); you need to fail both to be knocked out. If you only fail your Reflex you are unaffected, if you fail your Fortitude save your next 1d4+1 rounds you can only take partial actions.

• Material: All objects within the cone must succeed at a Fortitude save (DC 25) or shatter. Objects (or portions of objects) that have up to 30 hit points are potentially affected by this attack. Magic items are immune to this

Improved Grab (Ex): To use this ability, the Dravern must hit with both claw attacks. If it gets a hold, it hangs on and stings.

Snatch: If a Dravern gets a hold on a creature, four or more sizes smaller, it automatically deals damage with both claws and its sting attacks each round the hold is maintained. The Dravern can drop a creature it has snatched as a free action or use a standard action to fling it aside. A flung creature travels 30 feet and takes 3d6 points of damage. If the Dravern flings it while flying, the creature suffers this amount or falling damage, whichever is greater.

Special qualities: Dravern have scent, DR (5/+1), Sonics Immunity, Hover and Blindsight. It also gains Push back, once a round, as a free action, jump and flap its wings to move back 15 feet

Skills: *Draverns receive a +3 racial bonus to Spot checks when flying during daylight hours.
Draverns gain a +10 racial modifier when in caves or other enclosed places.

Flay worm (Young)

Small Aberration
Hit-dice: 1d8 (4hp)
Initiative: 3(+3 dex)
AC: 17 (+3 Dex, +1 size, +3 Nat. armour)
Attack: 5 tentacles +4, bite +0, tail -3
Damage: 5 Tentacles 1d2 Bite 2d4 Tail 1d2 +1d6 acid
Reach: 5 ft. by 5 ft./5 ft.
Special attacks: improved grab, extract,
Special qualities: Illithid speech
Saves: Fort +0 Ref +3 Will +6
Abilities: Str 7 Dex 17 Con 10 Int 17 Wis 19 Cha 10
Skills: Hide+2, Jump+10, Move silently+2 spot+12 listen+4
Feats: Weapon Finesse (Tentacles, Tail) Alertness, Skill focus: Jump

Climate or terrain: Warm marsh, underground
Organization: Hive (5-17 medium-sized, 1-2 old, 2-5 young)
Challenge rating: TBA
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always evil (Had them tagged as Neutral for a while)
Advancement: 2-6(Medium sized) 7-10(Large)

Flay worms seem to be the concoction of an evil wizard tampering with Mind flayer tadpoles; they are at least 3 ft long snake like creatures.

With a round mouth and 5 tentacles, it resembles a mindflayer, around a contractible moth. It has a long (1/3 of the body) flat end of the tail, that seem to be webbed spikes. Flay worms can jump high and often surprise large creatures. Young Flay worms have 10's of eyes along it, these fall of at the advancement to medium-sized to 4 eyes around the mouth, these are dirty cream to yellow with almost no pupil, At the size large they have no eyes. Most of a Flay worms life is spent not getting killed and the rest is eating, after an attack on their lair Flay worms will sit perfectly still digesting flesh they have bitten of or brain tissue.

Combat:
Once encountered, Flay worms swarm and jump at the attacking character, and latch on where ever they can, though most go straight for the head.

Improved Grab (Ex): To use this ability, the Flay worm must hit a Tiny to Medium-sized creature with its tentacle attack. If it gets a hold, it attaches the tentacle to the opponent’s head. A Flay worm can grab a Large or larger creature, but only if it can somehow reach the foe’s head. After a successful grab, the Flay worm can try to attach its remaining tentacles with a single grapple check. The opponent can escape with a single successful grapple check or Escape Artist check, but the Flay worm gets a +2 circumstance bonus for every tentacle that was attached at the beginning of the opponent’s turn.

Extract (Ex): A Flay worm that begins its turn with all 5 tentacles attached and successfully maintains its hold automatically cuts through an opponents head, in the next round it extracts the opponent’s brain, instantly killing that creature, if the creature is large or larger the process takes +1 rounds for ever Size category larger then large.

Tail (Ex) The tail, on successful hit, deals 1d6 acid damage.

Flay worm (Mature)
Medium-Sized Aberration
Hit-Dice: 2d8-6d8 (9hp-27hp)
Initiative: 6 (+2 dex +4 Improved Initiative)
AC: 16-18 (+2 dex +0 size +4-6 Nat. AC)
Attacks: 5 Tentacles +3 Bite -2 Tail -4
Damage: 5 Tentacles 1d3 Bite 2d6 Tail 1d3 + 1d8 acid
Reach: 5ft by 5ft/5ft
Special attacks: Improved grab, extract, Tail sear, spring attack
Special qualities: Illithid speech, Acid spill
Saves: Fort +1 Ref +2 Will +8
Abilities: Str 11 Dex 15 Con 12 Int 18 Wis 20 Cha 10
Skills: Hide+2, Jump+10, Move silently+2 spot+2 listen+4
Feats: Weapon Finesse (Bite, Tentacles) Alertness, Skill focus: Jump, Improved initiative

Climate or terrain: Warm marsh, underground
Organization: Hive (5-17 medium-sized, 1-2 old, 2-5 young)
Challenge rating: TBA
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always evil (Had them tagged as Neutral for a while)
Advancement: 2-6(Medium sized) 7-10(Large)

Flay worms seem to be the concoction of an evil wizard tampering with Mind flayer tadpoles; they are at least 3 ft long snake like creatures.

With a round mouth and 5 tentacles, it resembles a mindflayer, around a contractible moth. It has a long (1/3 of the body) flat end of the tail, that seem to be webbed spikes. Flay worms can jump high and often surprise large creatures. Young Flay worms have 10's of eyes along it, these fall of at the advancement to medium-sized to 4 eyes around the mouth, these are dirty cream to yellow with almost no pupil, At the size large they have no eyes. Most of a Flay worms life is spent not getting killed and the rest is eating, after an attack on their lair Flay worms will sit perfectly still digesting flesh they have bitten of or brain tissue.

Combat:
Once encountered, Flay worms swarm and jump at the attacking character, and latch on where ever they can, though most go straight for the head.

Improved Grab (Ex): To use this ability, the Flay worm must hit a Small to Large Creature with its tentacle attack. If it gets a hold, it attaches the tentacle to the opponent’s head. A Flay worm can grab a Huge or larger creature, but only if it can somehow reach the foe’s head. After a successful grab, the Flay worm can try to attach its remaining tentacles with a single grapple check. The opponent can escape with a single successful grapple check or Escape Artist check, but the Flay worm gets a +2 circumstance bonus for every tentacle that was attached at the beginning of the opponent’s turn.

Extract (Ex): A Flay worm that begins its turn with all 5 tentacles attached and successfully maintains its hold automatically cuts through an opponents head, in the next round it extracts the opponent’s brain, instantly killing that creature, if the creature is Huge or larger the process takes +1 rounds for ever Size category larger then large.

Spring attack (Ex) A flay worm May use this to jump up and latch onto a head/body part

Tail (Ex) The tail, on successful hit, deals 1d8 acid damage.

Illithid speech (Su) Flay worms may speak telepathically to any Illithid

Acid spill (Ex) Once a Flay worm is killed a pool of corrosive acid accumulates in a 4 ft pool (As Ochre jelly)

Flay worm (Adult)
Large Aberration
Hit-Dice: 7d8-10d8 (31hp-45hp)
Initiative: 5 (+1 dex +4 Improved Initiative)
AC: 16-18 (+1 dex -1 size +6-8 Nat. AC)
Attacks: 5 Tentacles +5 Bite + 0 Tail -2
Damage: 5 Tentacles 1d4 + 4 Bite 2d8 +6 Tail 1d4+ 4 + 2d4
Reach: 5ft by 10ft/5ft
Special attacks: Improved grab, extract, Tail sear, spring attack, blindfight
Special qualities: Illithid speech, Acid spill
Saves: Fort +4 Ref +2 Will +6
Abilities: Str 18 Dex 12 Con 17 Int 18 Wis 22 Cha 10
Skills: Hide+2, Jump+10, Move silently+2 spot+0 listen+10
Feats: Weapon Finesse (Bite, Tentacles) Alertness, Skill focus: Jump, Spring attack, Blindfight

Climate or terrain: Warm marsh, underground
Organization: Hive (5-17 medium-sized, 1-2 old, 2-5 young)
Challenge rating: TBA
Treasure: None
Alignment: Always evil (Had them tagged as Neutral for a while)
Advancement: 2-6(Medium sized) 7-10(Large)

Flay worms seem to be the concoction of an evil wizard tampering with Mind flayer tadpoles; they are at least 3 ft long snake like creatures.

With a round mouth and 5 tentacles, it resembles a mindflayer, around a contractible moth. It has a long (1/3 of the body) flat end of the tail, that seem to be webbed spikes. Flay worms can jump high and often surprise large creatures. Young Flay worms have 10's of eyes along it, these fall of at the advancement to medium-sized to 4 eyes around the mouth, these are dirty cream to yellow with almost no pupil, At the size large they have no eyes. Most of a Flay worms life is spent not getting killed and the rest is eating, after an attack on their lair Flay worms will sit perfectly still digesting flesh they have bitten of or brain tissue.

Combat:
Once encountered, Flay worms swarm and jump at the attacking character, and latch on where ever they can, though most go straight for the head.

Improved Grab (Ex): To use this ability, the Flay worm must hit a Medium-sized to Huge creature with its tentacle attack. If it gets a hold, it attaches the tentacle to the opponent’s head. A Flay worm can grab a Huge or larger creature, but only if it can somehow reach the foe’s head. After a successful grab, the Flay worm can try to attach its remaining tentacles with a single grapple check. The opponent can escape with a single successful grapple check or Escape Artist check, but the Flay worm gets a +2 circumstance bonus for every tentacle that was attached at the beginning of the opponent’s turn.

Extract (Ex): A Flay worm that begins its turn with all 5 tentacles attached and successfully maintains its hold automatically cuts through an opponents head, in the next round it extracts the opponent’s brain, instantly killing that creature, if the creature is huge or larger the process takes +1 rounds for ever Size category larger then Huge.

Spring attack (Ex) A flay worm May use this to jump up and latch onto a head/body part

Tail (Ex) The tail, on successful hit, deals 2d4 acid damage

Illithid speech (Su) Flay worms may speak telepathically to any Illithid

Acid spill (Ex) Once a Flay worm is killed a pool of corrosive acid accumulates in a 10 ft pool (As Black pudding)
 
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Quite a bit of monsters here. If you want more comments you might want to give each critter a seperate thread.

Undervile: The hps should be 150 (forgot to multiply the Con Bonus by the HD). The saves should be +15, Ref +8, and Will +3. You might also want to consider making it a magical beast, or maybe even an aberration. You also forgot the attack bonus and strength bonus to damage.

Plaze: I like this one. Perfect monster to fool the players into thinking it is easy pickings if encountered alone or in small groups. Average hp should be 1. If you want to apply its Dex bonus instead of Strenth modifier to apply to the attack bonus for its slam, you might want to give it the Weapon finesse (Slam) feat, otherwise its attack bonus it going to be +4 (+8 size, -4 strength). Since it has a massive strenth penalty to damage, you might want to add to the ooze's damage acid damage, say like 1d4 or so. Also, the plaze's saves should be +0, +4, -5 (saves for an ooze are all Poor saves, and size modifier does not affect Reflex saves). I really think the Groove SQ is cool; what made you think of that? Ghostbusters II :D . You might also want to give plazes the ability to join together into giant super blobs.

Dravern: Average hp should be 168. AC should be 24. The attack bonus for the bite or claws should be +21 and for the others +16. Damage mod. for Strength should be +7 for the bite and claws and +3 for everything else. Saves should be +14, +11, and +11; dragon saves are all Good saves. The CR should probably be higher than 6.

Flay worms: Ah, another monster good for use in campaigns with CoC influence. You might want to recheck the attack bonuses for the various natural weapons. Don't forget to put the Strength modifiers for damage.
Young: Saves should be +0, +3, +6. (Aberrations have only good Will saves).
Mature and Adult: You forgot the Con bonus for hp on these. The save bonuses for a 2 HD mature flay worm should be +1, +2, +8. The save bonuses for an Adult, 7 HD flay worm should be +5, +3, +11.
 

Thank you, I'l get round to them ASAIGSS As soon as I get some sleep! I've changed the plaze, and no, not ghostbusters, someone on the net sugested it...:D
 


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