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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Trench" data-source="post: 4112350" data-attributes="member: 40464">Deevolly Bencez and Cipke Arnag- MidtownDeevolly approaches the inebriated elf and smiles winningly. "Wow! Whatcha got there?"    The elf grins at Deevoly, which causes a few scowls by the girls behind him. "ISh... It's a rod. It DOES things!"The elf stamps the rod into the ground once. The gems sparkle and his head lolls as he peers around him. "LOOK! I made it RAIN!""Delvers," Runeshield mutters to Cipke. "They should get permits for those things. It's cute when it's all butterflies and glowing fire, but sooner or later he'll cycle around to a fireball. Kid better know what's she's doing." He turns to the Watch mage. "Keep him from setting it off if you can, but mostly get the longears to turn it over. He won't listen to a dwarf, so I'm heading out for backup in case he summons an elephant like the last one."    "Oooooh!" Deevolly coos. "I've seen those before! Have you found the 'fun' button? You know . . .," she whispers close to his ear. "The one that makes you feel really good?"The elf goes cross-eyed looking at Deevoly. "HAve I!"He stamps the ground again and the gems flash. A shower of colored, shimmering lights burst in front of him, almost blinding Deevoly. A merhcant cries out and holds his hands in front of his eyes, now unable to see and tripping over his wares. Likewise, Runeshield finds himself blundering about, suddenly blinded and swearing in Dwarven. Cipke averts his eyes, but still finds himself looking at spots for a moment.    "No, not that, silly!" Deevolly chides. "It's a hidden switch . . .you have to twist the . . here, let me show you."Nooooo!" he slurs, drunkenly pulling the rod away. "I... I FOUND it... Down there... We, my team had an adventure! We got gold... and. And gold...""I don't want to keep it!" Deevolly smiles and puts her hand on his arm. "I can't use these things anyway. But there's this switch that makes you feel . . .you know . . .REALLY good . . ."The elf looks decidedly suspicious. But maybe it's the hand on his arm or the alcohol, but Deevoly can see him begin to wonder..."Ah... Really?""Hey," One of the girls snarls at Deevoly. "No one asked you for help! He's just fine!"Runshield swears as he trips over a pile of dead butterflies. Cipke's eyes clear up in time to see oarnge and red wings poke out of his beard and the wizard swears in dwarven as his eyesight returns. Then he approaches Deevoly and the man."Hey! I'm a skilled appraiser. I'll take a look at the rod and I'll tell you what else it can do. I know someone who has a store that can pay top gold for it."    "Really?" the elf says to Cipke. Inexplicably, he seems to buy the wizard's tale."Yeah. I grew up minding a store couple of minutes from here. I couldn't even see above the counter and I was telling cloaks of charisma from cloaks of stealth. Let me see the markings.""AHA!" Cipke says, his manner all jovial. "I have found how to activate the fun button!""Really?" the elf asks quietly. "Where?""That's where it gets complicated," Cipke winks toward his partner Deevolly. "It needs to be held by an elf, a human and a dwarf. Human holds the base, elf holds the middle and dwarf holds the tip." "Now that's just stupid..." the elf slurs.    Cipke shrugs. "Yeah. It's not the stupidest thing I've ever read. You'd never believe what the One Ring required to be activated: it had to be carried between the thighs of a virgin halfling. Do you know how hard it is to find a virgin halfling?""If you don't believe me, we can go to that store and you can have it appraised free of charge. No big deal. I grab the base, you hold the middle with your right hand and a dwarf..." he signals the dwarven Watchmen to approach "...holds the tip.""Once we have it, you have to close your eyes and push the button with your left hand. I'll guide your hand."The elf narrows his eyes but slowly extends the rod out to Cipke."Do you speak dwarvish?." Cipke says in dwarvish to the elf."What?" the elf asks, confused."Pefect," Cipke says. "Runey," the wizard says in dwarvish. "You pull this rod out of his hands when we go."Runeshield blinks as his vision begins to return. "I what?" the dwarf says."Starting the process," Cipke says in Imperial. "Grab the rod in the middle." He says with a grin. "Sir, grab it. Twist to the left on my mark." "Now, I grab here, he grabs there and you're one incantation away from ecstasy."    The dwarven Watchman looks at Cipke incredulously. "I never plan on holding an elf's rod. Especially one that could electrocute me at random. Are you serious?"    "Almost ready!" Cipke ignores the dwarf, much to the amusement of his partner Dee. "Close your eyes!" He says to the elf in a singsong voice. He places his hand abovethe elf's hand and motions the Watchman to take the lower 'safe' part."If I'm burnt to a crisp, it's on you Arnag."The dwarf grabs the end of the rod with a snarl. The elf starts to say something, but it's too late. In his inebriated state, Cipke easily plucks his hand off the rod. Likewise, Runeshield manages to wrestle it away from the elf without it activating.The elf sadly looks at his rod in the hands of an angry dwarf. "It didn't work..."The girls behind him snort in disgust and begin walking off."There's been a streak of Rods of Wonder going soft after 3 or 4 discharges." Cipke says to the sad elf. "Don't worry, we shall see about that later." As he sees Runeshield move away with the Rod, he gives the elf a side-by-side hug as he walks him towards the Watchtower. "What say you we go and draft a complaints letter?""Oh I got the nancy elf, Arnag don't you worry," Glanbrin grabs the elf by the scruff of the neck (which is exactly as uncomfortable as it sounds). Many of the shopkeepers grumble to themselves as they sweep dead butterflies off their shelves and awnings.    "Good work, Cipke," Deevolly smiles."You're welcome, Dee.</blockquote>

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