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Respect for the DM?
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<blockquote data-quote="Nikroecyst" data-source="post: 4069726" data-attributes="member: 47287"><p>Im wondering if I am being really picky or if any other DMs have had this problem more recently than previously.</p><p></p><p>In the past I had very little problems with players. Every group generally has a problem player but thats to be expected. Now adays though I see more and more people who either don't respect what the DM is doing or don't care.</p><p></p><p>Now you can chalk alot of this up to people not respecting other people, which fudimentally, is prolly what its all about. But Im wondering if there is a deeper issue here. Like maybe the way the game mechanics are taught or even the game mechanics themselfs.</p><p></p><p>I will give examples of what I mean by players "disrespecting" thier Dms. </p><p></p><p>1.) As a DM you pour over sources, books, and stories collecting ideas and building a game. You make it unique and involve all the players and characters to make it interesting for everyone. When you get to your second or even your first scene of the evening and the players don't like what they are fighting or were suprised to see themselfs at a disadvantage for once they get upset and claim that the encounter is "unfair" due to the fact that they have to work for thier treasure.</p><p></p><p>2.) You warn the group ahead of time that a rule will be changed for a paticular encounter. You explain why to the best of your ability without giving away the encounter ahead of time. You also go through the effort of making sure that everyone in the group fully understands the new rule. When it comes time to use the rule and they dont' like it, they refer to it as "retarded" or "stupid". Instead of simply telling you why they dont' like it and why its effects are too negetive, they go on a rant about how "dumb" it is, without citing a reason why. These types of things could be taken personally becaue you spend every free minute you have writting for them and they, inturn, bash your game.</p><p></p><p>3.) When some one in the group requests an item from a source book or a source you paticularly don't like, trust, or you may even think it is broken. At first a second appeal is to be expected providing that they can give a decent reason why THEY think it would be ok for them to have it in your game. But when you have to say "No" 3, 4, and even 5 times what do you do then? You may have reasons that you cannot reveal to them yet. The item or ability may not fit the campaign world. The item may even be broken. Isn't it a little disrespectful to assume that your DM is just skrewing you or not considering your opinion of what is fun?</p><p></p><p>4.) Last one, I promise. I get the attitude from my players, more often than not, that the game is them vs me. Not the characters against the monsters, enemy, or even the challenge. I, the DM am targeted alot with snide, offensive, or even generally mean comments. Which I usually tack up to them just meaning to aim thier comments at the villians in the game and not me. But it goes beyond comments or name calling. They expect me to skrew them at every turn and they expect me to try to kill them every chance I get. This is generally not my intention, I write and perform every game, whether they realize it or not, with plenty of chances for them to get out of every bad situation they put themselfs in. An example of this is a paticular player who continously makes bad decisions and gets himself killed often (once every 3 games on average). He gets mad at me that "I" kill him or that my games are too tough. </p><p></p><p>Now don't get me wrong, I have had a million fun times with these same people but I feal heavily underappriciated and generally abused as a DM. I feal that it is harder than people think to write a game and even hard to write a GOOD game. I feal that there is more to just throwing together some story and plot line. You want everyone in the group to have a good time and be entertained therefore you have to manage the tastes and concerns of everyone at your game table including you. </p><p></p><p>Granted there is alot of whinning in here and those who know me best will even say that I am just whinning. So give it to me straight! Is this me or has respect for the DM gone the way of the dinosaur?</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="Nikroecyst, post: 4069726, member: 47287"] Im wondering if I am being really picky or if any other DMs have had this problem more recently than previously. In the past I had very little problems with players. Every group generally has a problem player but thats to be expected. Now adays though I see more and more people who either don't respect what the DM is doing or don't care. Now you can chalk alot of this up to people not respecting other people, which fudimentally, is prolly what its all about. But Im wondering if there is a deeper issue here. Like maybe the way the game mechanics are taught or even the game mechanics themselfs. I will give examples of what I mean by players "disrespecting" thier Dms. 1.) As a DM you pour over sources, books, and stories collecting ideas and building a game. You make it unique and involve all the players and characters to make it interesting for everyone. When you get to your second or even your first scene of the evening and the players don't like what they are fighting or were suprised to see themselfs at a disadvantage for once they get upset and claim that the encounter is "unfair" due to the fact that they have to work for thier treasure. 2.) You warn the group ahead of time that a rule will be changed for a paticular encounter. You explain why to the best of your ability without giving away the encounter ahead of time. You also go through the effort of making sure that everyone in the group fully understands the new rule. When it comes time to use the rule and they dont' like it, they refer to it as "retarded" or "stupid". Instead of simply telling you why they dont' like it and why its effects are too negetive, they go on a rant about how "dumb" it is, without citing a reason why. These types of things could be taken personally becaue you spend every free minute you have writting for them and they, inturn, bash your game. 3.) When some one in the group requests an item from a source book or a source you paticularly don't like, trust, or you may even think it is broken. At first a second appeal is to be expected providing that they can give a decent reason why THEY think it would be ok for them to have it in your game. But when you have to say "No" 3, 4, and even 5 times what do you do then? You may have reasons that you cannot reveal to them yet. The item or ability may not fit the campaign world. The item may even be broken. Isn't it a little disrespectful to assume that your DM is just skrewing you or not considering your opinion of what is fun? 4.) Last one, I promise. I get the attitude from my players, more often than not, that the game is them vs me. Not the characters against the monsters, enemy, or even the challenge. I, the DM am targeted alot with snide, offensive, or even generally mean comments. Which I usually tack up to them just meaning to aim thier comments at the villians in the game and not me. But it goes beyond comments or name calling. They expect me to skrew them at every turn and they expect me to try to kill them every chance I get. This is generally not my intention, I write and perform every game, whether they realize it or not, with plenty of chances for them to get out of every bad situation they put themselfs in. An example of this is a paticular player who continously makes bad decisions and gets himself killed often (once every 3 games on average). He gets mad at me that "I" kill him or that my games are too tough. Now don't get me wrong, I have had a million fun times with these same people but I feal heavily underappriciated and generally abused as a DM. I feal that it is harder than people think to write a game and even hard to write a GOOD game. I feal that there is more to just throwing together some story and plot line. You want everyone in the group to have a good time and be entertained therefore you have to manage the tastes and concerns of everyone at your game table including you. Granted there is alot of whinning in here and those who know me best will even say that I am just whinning. So give it to me straight! Is this me or has respect for the DM gone the way of the dinosaur? [/QUOTE]
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