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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Pielorinho" data-source="post: 280952" data-attributes="member: 259">I don't really see that the fault is with either party.  When Joe went up the stairs, the DM shoulda said, "so, y'all are going up to the next level?" or something like that, and gotten approval.You probably shoulda said, without prompting, "I'm staying down here."  Honestly, I don't see anything in your story suggesting that you intended NOT to go up the stairs.I'm guessing that, had there been no trap, you would've gone along with the "everybody goes up stairs" assumption with no complaint.To solve the problem in the future, I'd suggest piping up with statements like that -- specifically, statements that distinguish your actions from other folks'.  "Y'all might be drinking yourselves goofy, but I'm finishing this glass and going to bed."  "I'm gonna poke around down at the bottom of the stairs and maybe play a little ditty on my harmonica."  "You folks go on ahead into the cavern -- I'll stay out here and watch the horses graze."  "Hold on -- I'm not joining in an attack on a crown prince, no matter how snotty he is."  Be prompt and consistent with these statements.  It's not enough just to state when you ARE following along with other people:  you need to be stating when you're NOT.Then, if the DM assumes you're following ahead without giving you a chance to make your Loner declaration, you can call him on the carpet for it.*********I can sympathize.  I was once playing a little wussy necromancer goth teenager, and the party went to the island nunnery where his insane mother lived.  The DM really wanted a confrontation scene between gothboy and crazymom.  Naturally, gothboy DIDN'T want that confrontation.  So the DM just assumed that gothboy followed the party into the temple where they knew crazymom was working.  It was a PBEM game, and we were playing in a chat room, and I couldn't type, "WAIT!  NO! HOLD ON!" fast enough for the DM to believe me, and the scene happened without my being able to prevent it.  Grrr....However, the DM in this situation had a good reason to assume I wouldn't go ahead with her plan and did it anyway.  I don't see, in your story, where your DM had a good reason to assume that you wouldn't go ahead with the plan.  I therefore think you should be proactive in this respect in the future; it might minimize the miscommunications.Daniel</blockquote>

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