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<blockquote data-quote="Umbran" data-source="post: 9308552" data-attributes="member: 177">It is not personal, about your shortcomings.&nbsp; It is about a common shortcoming we frequently see in writing.&nbsp; As I noted - you were merely the immediate example.Okay, to begin, again, I am now talking about the writing itself, not our conversation.&nbsp; I am not personally offended - I'm only trying to point out the rhetorical missteps here.What you wrote was, logically speaking, &quot;I am sorry for &lt;your action&gt;.&quot;&nbsp; As opposed to, &quot;I am sorry for &lt;my own action&gt;.&quot;&nbsp; It does not actually identify any error on the part of the speaker. It is one of the classic forms of <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Non-apology_apology#:~:text=A%20non%2Dapology%20apology%2C%20sometimes,those%20ostensibly%20receiving%20the%20apology" target="_blank">&quot;non-apology apology&quot;</a>.&nbsp; A well-formed apology apologizes for recognized actions under one's own control, rather than results that may not be.One can see the issue with the form, and how it assigns responsibility, when one makes the example more concrete, like: &quot;I am sorry you slapped me in the face.&quot;&nbsp; Now, it might actually be that my face was in the wrong place at the wrong time, but if that's the case, that's what I should refer to directly.I am making no request of you at all.&nbsp; I am merely discussing writing.</blockquote>

[QUOTE="Umbran, post: 9308552, member: 177"] It is not personal, about [I]your[/I] shortcomings. It is about a common shortcoming we frequently see in writing. As I noted - you were merely the immediate example. Okay, to begin, again, I am now talking about the writing itself, not our conversation. I am not personally offended - I'm only trying to point out the rhetorical missteps here. What you wrote was, logically speaking, "I am sorry for <your action>." As opposed to, "I am sorry for <my own action>." It does not actually identify any error on the part of the speaker. It is one of the classic forms of [URL='https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Non-apology_apology#:~:text=A%20non%2Dapology%20apology%2C%20sometimes,those%20ostensibly%20receiving%20the%20apology']"non-apology apology"[/URL]. A well-formed apology apologizes for recognized actions under one's own control, rather than results that may not be. One can see the issue with the form, and how it assigns responsibility, when one makes the example more concrete, like: "I am sorry you slapped me in the face." Now, it might actually be that my face was in the wrong place at the wrong time, but if that's the case, that's what I should refer to directly. I am making no request of you at all. I am merely discussing writing. [/QUOTE]

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