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Message: <blockquote data-quote="BoldItalic" data-source="post: 7114955" data-attributes="member: 6777052">Neu Floc nudged Ballnard pointedly in the ribs[sup]1[/sup] and nodded towards Sashi. "I think you owe the little lady an explanation," he suggested."You're not my sister Flossie, are you? Why did you pretend you were?"Ballnard sighed. "I'm a sorcerer. I didn't want to be, I wanted to be a bard, look, I've even got the drum, but a few days ago this fey being calling itself UnderscoreStrikethrough uttered some sort of incantation in trochaic tetrameters and I haven't been the same since.""That still doesn't explain the cross-dressing.""There's a warrant out for me in Axefell. Long story. Duke Bignose couldn't take a joke. If I turn up in town wearing leather armour and a floppy hat, fingers will point and I'll be swinging from a lamppost by sundown.""Hold on, sorcerers can't wear armor. It's in the rules. Everyone knows that.""I got a feat. I'm a variant human.""Variant human, eh? Well that explains the cross-dressing. It's okay. My mum is also my brother-in-law. Actually, you look quite good in a flouncey skirt but you're walking all wrong.""Thanks for being a pal. Can we do this next bit of the thread together? I've a feeling we'll be heading up-country.""We have a choice? Besides, it's time some more characters turned up. A ranger would do. I hope it's not a paladin though. They're so earnest.""I know what you mean. It's all smite-smite-smite with them. They never stop to think it smightn't."Flu Once nodded. This was all going according to plan. In a post or two they would meet Sir Earnest de Coverlet, a disgraced nobleman who flunked jousting and was reduced to taking a job as a hermit's receptionist. His hermit was on the cusp of making an amazing discovery involving dark energy and epistemological inexactitude but the equations were refusing to renormalise unless they got a pay rise and longer lunch breaks. [hr][/hr][sup]1[/sup] Flounce horns are quite sharp and pointy and, to avoid accidents in the dark, the flounce herders dye them bright yellow using the juice of a locally-grown fruit called a dilemma. It's called that, because it looks like two lemons fused together. There's a joke in there somewhere involving horns and dilemmas, but it's DC30 and I only rolled a 9. Sorry.</blockquote>

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