NOW LIVE! Today's the day you meet your new best friend. You don’t have to leave Wolfy behind... In 'Pets & Sidekicks' your companions level up with you!

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Message: <blockquote data-quote="Craig Fox" data-source="post: 7117717" data-attributes="member: 6882019">Phinsk woke up in a cold dark alleyway, with hard stones underneath him and some scruffy street cat licking his face. Groaning with a massive headache, Phinsk growled "Get away ya bugger.", roughly shoving the cat aside."Meow! Is that any way to treat your patron?" said the cat."Oh darn, this of all times I had to be reminded that I signed up with the jolly Cat Lord." sighed Phinsk. "Couldn't you have put me somewhere more comfortable, a bed, like?""And how was I supposed to do that?" asked the Cat Lord. "Folks in these parts aren't too amenable to a talking cat asking for a meal and lodgings.""Yeah, yeah, OK. So the fight - did you see that?""It's over." stated the Cat Lord. "Everyone in that bar is sitting there quietly, trying to drink away the memory of being pulverised into next week by a disarmingly feminine looking man in a fetching skin-tight leotard, and not caring a jot that they have to do it on wine."Well, that's one way to restore peace." muttered Phinsk. He struggled to get to his feet, but a wave of pain and nausea hit him."No, no son, you just stay there for now." murmured the Cat Lord soothingly. "Besides, I didn't just come here to save your ass (and head) from flying trombones. I came here to call in a favour. I gave you a rewarding career path as a fey warlock, and now it's time for you to do something for me.""Not right now, I hope." groaned Phinsk. The pain was really bad."No, but you should start seriously planning it tomorrow morning." said the Cat Lord. "In a nutshell, a terrible foe has arisen, one growing stronger by the day, who will soon be capable of tearing down barriers between planes of existence, and destroying what he finds here. Planes like the Feywild/Arborea/you know, where I live.""What, you mean that new Acererak that Bobuntil built?""No, not him. He's tough, but a competent party of levels 10+ can take him down. I'm talking about those spare parts of The Machine of Lum the Mad that Bobuntil tried to use. When exposed to the Book of Vile Darkness, they fused together, came to life, and ran off."Phinsk laughed, despite the pain. "And I guess it tried to find its other parts and fuse back into one."The Cat Lord held up a paw. "You'd think so, but no! Instead, it roamed around looking for artificers which it could shake down and intimidate into building powerful mods and extensions for it. Already, this thing is pimped to the max, Twenty feet high, CR 25 at least, and known as The Machine of Lum the Madder. It's rumoured that the tarrasque stays hidden because it's too scared to show up while Lum the Madder is roaming about. But that's not all.""Of course not!" Phinsk almost shouted. "That would be more than all the all we need, but there's still more! Aarrghh!!""'Fraid so. That beer you saw being stolen? It's happening everywhere. Lum the Madder wants to rip out the very bedrock of civilization by removing its beer, so it's sent its followers to steal it all. We can live without magic, but not the simple ritual of drinking a tasty ale in a rowdy establishment." The Cat Lord stopped and looked around. "Oh look, a group of the Sisters of Mercy are walking by. Call out for them for assistance."Phinsk did so. "Oh look, that halfling's hurt!" said one of the Sisters. Phinsk sighed with relief. He'd soon have some healing and rest. The Cat Lord sidled up close, looking like any cat nuzzling someone's cheek, while whispering in Phinsk's ear. "Ask her if they allow cats. I'm hungry, and these garbage cans have far too many rot grubs."</blockquote>

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