Reply to thread

Message: <blockquote data-quote="S'mon" data-source="post: 1490853" data-attributes="member: 463">I agree that ENWorld does seem to attract (or produce?) a high quality bunch of gamers - all my ENWorld recruits to my group have been great!  <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />AG, I'm kinda on both sides of your complaint.  I've been without a group and trying to play with people I didn't get along with so well, feeling not that dissimilar to yourself, and I've been GMing a group and had to decide that I didn't want to play with some of the players I had.  I'd say try to find people like you, people who like you, people you get along with.  One thing you may have trouble with, in socialising, is putting on your 'best face' with new people - until you know them well and could definitely call them friends, it's best not to seem too depressed, or needy, anxious etc - regard it as a performance - after all, you're a Roleplayer, right?  <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />To start with - DON'T make any but the lightest out-of-game conversation, especially DON'T talk about the bad things in your life.  Your fellow players are NOT your friends, that's a fallacy - they are POTENTIAL friends.  If you get on well, they may become your friends, but to start with they are not 'committed' to you and they are NOT going to be interested in your sob stories.  Asking for rides is ok IF someone is ready and willing to give you a ride, but they're not obliged to do so (and I'm very grateful to the player who ferries me to my fortnightly Midnight game!), so if they don't want to give you a ride - maybe it would be a detour for them - and you still want to play, you need to bear it with good grace and go the long & inconvenient way (public transport, bike, whatever). Any out-of-game chauffering should only be requested from _good friends_, - players you've played with awhile may _become_ good friends, but never presume on their friendship; or act resentful if they don't wish to help - as I said, they don't have any obligation to you.- That's my advice on dealing with people.  In the words of Marge Simpson, push the bad stuff "down, deep down to your ankles, so it's hardly there at all, and people will like you..."  <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />You don't have to do this all your life, but with new people you don't know, it's what you have to do if you want to be a popular player.  Buck up and push it down.  <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" /></blockquote>

Verification