The Gamers Manifesto

[jester47]

Adapted by jester47 from the hackers manifesto by Mentor.


----The Gamers Manifesto----

You saw another one today, they were all over the mall. "Yeah my fighter rolled a crit and took out the dragon…" "My elf ranger got axed by this wicked orc archer...”

Damn gamers. They're all alike.

But did you, in your three-piece psychology and 1950's conformity, ever take a look behind the eyes of the gamer? Did you ever wonder what made him tick, what forces shaped him, what may have molded him?

I am a gamer, enter my world...

Mine is a world that begins with school... I'm smarter than most of the other kids, this crap they teach us bores me...

Damn underachiever. They're all alike.

I'm in junior high or high school. I've listened to teachers explain for the fifteenth time how to reduce a fraction. I understand it. "No, Ms. Smith, I didn't show my work. I did it in my head..."

Damn gamer. Probably copied it. They're all alike.

I made a discovery today. I found Dungeons and Dragons. Wait a second, this is cool. It lets my imagination do what it wants to. If my character misses a save, it's because I rolled lousy. Not because someone doesn't like me... Or feels threatened by me.. Or thinks I'm a smart ass.. Or doesn't like teaching and shouldn't be here...

Damn gamer. All he does is play games. They're all alike.

And then it happened... a door opened to a world... rushing through late night dungeon crawls and drinking caffinated beverages till dawn, a magic pulse is sent out, a refuge from the day-to-day incompetencies is sought... a gaming group is found. "This is it... this is where I belong..." I know everyone here... even if I've never met them, never talked to them, may never hear from them again... I know you all...

Damn gamer. Tying up the kitchen table again. They're all alike...

You bet your ass we're all alike... we've been spoon-fed baby food at school when we hungered for steak... the bits of meat that you did let slip through were pre-chewed and tasteless. We've been dominated by sadists, or ignored by the apathetic. The few that had something to teach found us willing pupils, but those few are like drops of water in the desert.

This is our world now... the world of the dragon and the lich, the beauty of the ballad. We make use of a part of our mind already existing without paying for what could be dirt-cheap if entertainment wasn't run by profiteering gluttons, and you call us losers. We explore human motivations... and you call us losers. We seek to use our imaginations... and you call us losers. We exist without skin color, without nationality, without religious bias... and you call us losers. You live vicariously through the TV, you sell your dreams short, you fail to ask what if, you imagine problems that don’t exist, and tell us not using our imagination is for our own good, yet we're the losers.

Yes, I am a loser. My crime is that of being imaginative. My crime is that of judging people by how they play a game, not what they look like. My crime is that of having a more active imagination than you, something that you will never forgive me for.

I am a gamer, and this is my manifesto. You may stop this individual, but you can't stop us all... after all, we're all alike.

 

[gamecat]

ROCK ON!!! That is absolutely classic!

 

[jester47]

The funny thing about this is you can probably substitute any group into the manifesto that Mentor wrote. From sports fans to political groups. My world view certainly does not fit the profile of this manifesto, but it did at one time. I also think that it might pertain to the younger more socially shattered crowd of of high-school gamers than it does those out of high-school.

Aaron.

 

[Mathew_Freeman]

*raises a banner and starts the revolution*

WEEEEEEE SHALLLLL NOT BE DENIIIIIIIIIIIIED!

*calms down a bit*

Nice job. Entertaining. Funny. Huzzah.

 

[Thorntangle]

Great job! I feel so... empowered. Now let's demand that it be run in the NY Times.

Make sure to spell/grammar check before leafletting.

 

[Tsyr]

The funny thing about this is you can probably substitute any group into the manifesto that Mentor wrote. From sports fans to political groups. My world view certainly does not fit the profile of this manifesto, but it did at one time. I also think that it might pertain to the younger more socially shattered crowd of of high-school gamers than it does those out of high-school.

Aaron.

Welllll... yes and no. Yes, you can fill in other things. No, not everything, not without massive changes. The thing is wrote for a semi-persecuted misunderstood group that the majority of the world things really bad things about, and in general it also targets the "nerdy" type... the bit about life in school, for example.

For the record, that thing basicly is a script of my life, in this form.

 

[EricNoah]

Seems like you may have some "hostility toward teachers" issues.

Eric Noah
Teacher

 

[Tyler Do'Urden]

Wow... that brings back memories. I remember the first time I read the Mentor's manifesto the summer before my sophomore year of high school, it brought tears to my eyes. As a hacker and phreak, I was touched.

Now, years after I left that all behind, it just seems... silly. I remember my outrage at my mother's reaction to the manifesto- "this is just some kid trying to justify breaking the law". Now, five years later, I'm starting to feel the same way. Damn.

 

[EricNoah]

Completely off topic ... Tyler, have I ever told you how much your screen name cracks me up?

 

[Jeremy Ackerman-Yost]

Seems like you may have some "hostility toward teachers" issues.

Heck, Eric. I AM a teacher and I have "hostility toward teachers' issues. It might even be why I wanted to teach.

At any rate, I have to agree with Tsyr, I think it really only works for groups who have been marginalized in their youth, for one reason or another.