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Message: <blockquote data-quote="The Shadow" data-source="post: 1446991" data-attributes="member: 16760">This bit of character info on Carlos was originally going to be an email to SuentisPo, but I decided that it was likely of more general interest.  There are some minor spoilers here regarding the Shadow's latest adventure (the one following the capture of Matt), so read that first.-------------------------------------------------Thought you might be interested in some new character info about Carlos that has come up as I've pondered his current situation.First, though, a question:  During his time at the base, has he ever been sick?  Sick to the point of being non-functional, I mean.The reason I ask is that I don't think Carlos has any idea how to sit still and let somebody else take care of him.  It has rarely happened before;  and when it has happened, it's usually been a bad thing in the long run.  This is so ingrained in him that it'll probably be hard to shunt aside;  though it'll be easier if he and Alex have had this discussion before.I'm getting a better picture of what Carlos' life was like in the Garcia household.  They weren't the bottom of the barrel;  there are family situations out there that are worse.  But they were bad, and especially to the "whoreson".You see, Carlos' function in the family was to serve as the low man on the totem pole;  the one who wasn't loved, only tolerated.  ("Because after all, he's blood."  With the unspoken subtext of "Even if he is a bastard.")  If Dad is drunk and in a rage, you can usually manage to deflect his anger from you onto the whoreson.  If something gets broken, it's easy to put the blame on Carlos somehow.  "He's always doing things like that."If nothing works and Dad does let you have it, you can take out your anger on Carlos up to a point (mostly verbally) and know that Mom and Dad won't intervene.Is it any wonder he joined a gang?  Even apart from the sense of belonging it gave him, all of a sudden his cousins were scared of him.  He had a certain power.  Even his aunt and uncle (though this of course confirmed what they'd been saying about him all along) trod a little more warily around him, because they knew he could bring a gun home if he felt like it.  This doesn't mean he was no longer abused, just that it was rather less gratuitous.  Only when he, in whatever twisted sense, "deserved" it.  Yes, in his eyes as well as theirs;  he's been very slow in overcoming the belief that he deserves to get hurt when he screws up.  Being around Alex has been good for him that way, though he still gets very anxious when he makes mistakes.He also never really had a consistent space of his own.  The cousins would always complain about having to share a room with him, so he got moved around a lot.  This is why his spot in the base - his cot, a wall to put his pictures on, a place to put his clothes, a desk of his own to sit at and put his books on - is so precious to him.  He really doesn't mind having that space open to view;  he's used to that... and anyway, what's wrong with being observed by somebody who cares about him?  That's the real novelty!  (I have a feeling he doesn't like being enclosed, anyway - there may have been a closet incident or two in his childhood.)Anyway, being sick was not a good thing to be if you were the whoreson in the Garcia household.  It almost equated to proof of moral depravity.  If he was functional - and lucky - he'd just be ignored.  He'd get up and make something to eat (nobody else was going to do it for him), trying to be as inobvious as possible about coughing, sneezing, and so on.  If attention was drawn to the fact he was sick, he'd get the lecture about how he useless he was, good for nothing but bringing home germs.  (If other kids were sick too, somehow it would be his fault!)If Carlos was sick enough that he wasn't able to take care of himself, his aunt would do it, under much protest.  But that was really bad, because it would raise the accusation that he was "lazy", a drag on the family's resources and time, and that they really ought to turn him out on the street.  If he weren't "blood" they would have done it long ago!  There were a couple ugly incidents with his uncle inflicting little cruelties on him while he lay there, asking him if he still felt "lazy".  Maybe if your arm is twisted a bit more, you'll stop faking and get up and make yourself useful, hm?The result, of course, is that he would go to extreme lengths to get up and do whatever needed doing, no matter how he felt, or how ludicrous and unnecessary a sane person would see the effort.  And since he's reasonably healthy (though his lack of sleep no doubt takes a toll, true), I doubt this is an issue he's had much chance to get reassured about during his time at the base.  Perhaps not at all, or perhaps a little - but it's still an issue for him.P.S.  The other thing you really didn't want to do in Carlos' shoes was cry.  This would draw down all sorts of unwelcome attention.  The fact that he burst into tears upon meeting the Shadow the second time shows that there was inner upheaval of an unprecedented kind going on.  You know, I just realized - one reason why their first meeting might have made such a huge impression is that the Shadow, bizarrely enough (from Alex's perspective) showed some sign of caring about him even then!  After all, he didn't actually hurt Carlos in any way (the fear that'd been laid on him would have led him to expect it - he wasn't exactly acting in a way his uncle would consider "manly"), and expressed some sort of interest in his welfare.  He even stated that Carlos could change for the better, even if he didn't seem to consider it likely.  This was a new idea for him.  (Plus, no doubt he had an indistinct precognitive idea of where their relationship would go.)P.P.S.  Heh.  I just thought of a great line you could pull.  Grace has been in Carlos' mind now, and of course she's extremely psychologically astute.  If Carlos gets nervous about her helping him out, I could see her matter-of-factly informing him that she's a whore, so she's got no problem with him being a whoreson. <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />  "We dregs of society should stick together, right?"  (This with deliberate irony, given her gracious manner and expensive house.)P.P.P.S.  Heh, I feel like Gandalf.  <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />  I just realized that the whole dynamic with his cousins will influence how he relates with David, too.  Talk about insecurity;  he already knows what it's like to resent the "real" son.  And worse, he isn't even Alex's "blood".  His instinctive assumption will be that if David doesn't like him, Alex will "turn him out on the street".  This may lead to a bit of obsequiousness;  but on the other hand, if he's resigned to the possibility anyway, he might just cut loose and say what's on his mind.  (ESPECIALLY if David gets mad at Alex in front of him.  The sheer "ingratitude" and "childishness" of that, as he would see it, would outrage him.)Finally, note that while Carlos never talks about it, he sometimes feels intensely guilty about the time he shot Alex.  He knows Alex doesn't hold it against him, but still - "I could've KILLED him!"  You can imagine that he takes his task of helping Alex get vested up VERY seriously.  I don't think Alex realizes that Carlos still dwells on this at times, but Grace probably does;  she may try to subtly maneuver that into the open.P.P.P.P.S. Aaagh!  I keep coming up with further ideas after I think I've finished! <img src="https://cdn.jsdelivr.net/joypixels/assets/8.0/png/unicode/64/1f642.png" class="smilie smilie--emoji" loading="lazy" width="64" height="64" alt=":)" title="Smile    :)"  data-smilie="1"data-shortname=":)" />  I'm wondering now how Carlos took the Shadow's interaction with Julio.  Consider the similarities.  Julio's a year older than Carlos is now, maybe less.  He's in a gang up to his eyeballs, he's hit with the biggest fear of his life, spilling his guts with abandon.  Yet the Shadow kicks him out of town for good.  Sure, Carlos knows the reasons why, even approves of them.  But...  the subconscious is rarely very rational.----------------------------SP answered my basic question the night after I wrote this.  He says yes, Carlos has been a bit sick a couple times, but Alex quickly figured out he was really sensitive about it.  We think that Alex's solution has been to simply announce that he could use a night off when it's clear that Carlos is the one who could use it.  Perhaps he's done a little prowling about in the base's neighborhood on his own without Carlos being aware of it on those nights.</blockquote>

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