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<blockquote data-quote="htetickrt" data-source="post: 1648931" data-attributes="member: 16534"><p>Sorry for the long delay between posts; I had an accident with a Cutco knife while cutting bread and had a bit of trouble typing for a bit. Stupid unnecessarily sharp knife. Anyway, this one is short, but I hope it provides an amusing insight into the group's dynamics. Certainly they amused me.</p><p></p><p style="text-align: center">Entrance to the Inverted Tower</p><p></p><p>While the druid fumes and heroically attempts to stifle a retort, Quid steps to the fore, unable to resist the lure of any potential barter, even with a bugbear slave.</p><p></p><p>"Well met, tall friend,” she says, addressing a stone giant with a nasty welt under his eye. “An alliance does seem like it would be of mutual advantage. We have heard of your immense prowess in helping take this city. But, how are we to trust you who were recently our enemy? What are your plans for after the city is taken, and how do you want to divide the spoils?"</p><p></p><p>The giants, confused by the attention, defer to the bugbear who earlier addressed the group. There is a very long pause as he tries to digest Quid’s words. Eventually he says, "Yes. We very powerful. Take city. Kill, uh, kill many drow. Your enemy. Now we kill rest."</p><p></p><p>Rhien coughs and gently nudges Quid. He whispers, "They didn't help take the city. It was the other one, deeper in the Underdark. Or rather a different group of creatures helped take that city. Maerimydra I believe it is called. These seem to be slaves, perhaps liberated by Trella's elementals."</p><p></p><p>The bugbear apparently has sharp ears, and he snarls at the monk. "You know nothing. We no slaves. We strong, make drow do what we want. You need our help or you get killed, pale things. We get half of stuff; you get other half. Fair. We fight. Grrr! You fight. Phlump. We better. But we help. Ugh; you speak dumb. Make head hurt. Argh!"</p><p></p><p>Quid rolls her eyes and turns away from the bugbear. “Let’s just attack the inverted tower. The wizards there are probably the toughest foe we’ll face, so we should do so at maximum strength. Unless that big gate Khail found leads somewhere promising.”</p><p></p><p>“It leads to the Underdark,” Calla says with certainty. “We shouldn’t go down until we’ve killed every drow here. They’re sneaky buggers, and we shouldn’t leave any behind us.” Her eyes gleam eerily as she speaks.</p><p></p><p>Kai shudders involuntarily. “Um, of course. I’m going to go speak with the bugbear now.” Her approach speaking in the humanoid’s native language of goblin is greeted with enthusiasm, and the two begin an animated discourse that only ends when Trella arrives and pokes Kai in the shoulder with her index finger.</p><p></p><p>"Not to interrupt," the druid says, "but if you're done chatting with Hairy-head over there, would you mind letting us in on the details? More importantly, did my boys kick some bugbear ass?"</p><p></p><p>Kai laughs and turns around to face Trella, switching to elven smoothly. "Sorry; the bugbear is a lot smarter than he seems. Not actually smart, but not an idiot either. His name is Thulk, and from what I gather he's the head of the slaves. Some of your elementals got to here and engaged the stone giants, of which there used to be three, before finally being defeated. These slaves were the beneficiaries of that. Ordinarily they'd have tried to kill us already, but it seems that twelve heavily armed adventurers who control huge elementals are scary enough to get them to talk. Thulk claims he can help us get rid of the rest of the drow if we split the spoils with him."</p><p></p><p>Quid pokes her head in. “How about a language I can understand?” Thus begins a round of translation that amuses and confuses Thulk, and brings everyone up to speed. All except for Andy, that is, who knows only Common and so cannot be safely updated. This makes her sad, so she begins to sing. Cerridwin, feeling empathy, paws her crassly. Several people feel vaguely ill as a result.</p><p></p><p>Kai shudders a second time. “I don't know about you guys, but for my part I doubt this gang will be helpful enough to pay off. Maybe we could send them in one direction while we go in another? Although in that case they'd be sure to send us the more dangerous way. Shall I tell them we don't need help and see what they offer?” She repeats her words several more times in different languages, and contemplates a new career in the foreign service.</p><p></p><p>Quid maintains that “sixty ground troops and two giants should not be dismissed, especially if we use them properly. Ideally, we'd have a day, and I could alter my spells so that we could properly take them into battle. But we can use them as cannon fodder, and back them up like special forces, Afghanistan style. I imagine attacking the wizards to be a dangerous proposition, but we send them in for a frontal assault, and then supplement with our protection spells, ranged attacks, flight, and dispelling magics. The Maztican resisters were much easier to subjugate…er, I mean liberate, once we began pitting them against each other.”</p><p></p><p>Calla starts. “Afwhat’s it whoosit?”</p><p></p><p>The Waukeenar rubs the back of her neck. “Look, you guys didn't listen when I said it would be bad sleeping in the barracks, which is fine, but I think this opportunity is too great to waste. Acquisitions 5<img src="http://www.enworld.org/forum/images/smilies/13a.jpg" class="smilie" loading="lazy" alt=":13:" title="13th Age :13:" data-shortname=":13:" /> Why fight a war when you can get someone else to do it for you?”</p><p></p><p>Rhien looks distressed by this and turns to Quid. “There are only forty of them, and I can’t say I like outfitting them to die. I’ll have no part of this. When you’re ready to move on, I’ll be watching the chasm.” The monk walks off.</p><p></p><p>Kai raises her hands defensively. "Whoa, I didn't think it was <em>good</em> to sleep in the barracks, but as I said at the time, I thought they would attack us no matter where we went unless we teleported far away, and I didn't want to waste the spells teleporting back the next day. Steve's really heavy. Plus, now we've gotten some of their powerful people out of the way, rather than having to attack them in well-defended positions. But anyway, regarding our potential allies here, I agree that extra hands are always helpful. I'm just raising the question of whether their help is worth the price they're asking. You'd know the answer to that question better than I do, Quid, so you can decide and I'll pass the word along accordingly."</p><p></p><p>"I'm sorry, dear Kai," quickly replies Quid, "I had not meant to impugn your judgment. I do suppose except for dear Dobi, (may his soul nap in peace)," Quid makes a brief sacred gesture, "things did work out rather well last night.</p><p></p><p>"In terms of sharing the booty, if you put it that way, that's another story. Sending them off to attack on their own would have the same problem though. Perhaps they can accept other terms, such as one quarter of the gold, and half of the items, but we choose which items. They perhaps need us more than we need them, thus we should press our bargaining advantage. I am also worried about where they go afterward. Replacing rampaging drow with rampaging bugbears and giants is not necessarily the ideal resolution to this mess."</p><p></p><p>Kai turns to the bugbear to propose this split. He looks shifty before finally replying with a question of his own, dutifully relayed back to the group by Kai. "He wants to know what they would have to do. I don't think they'll really go for it if we tell them straight out that we want them to go first. Though that would certainly settle the question of what most of them would do afterward."</p><p></p><p>Quid nods. "Yup, well, that was also always part of my calculations. While I have a deep respect for all of Toril's creatures, the loss of a few goblins and bugbears would not be a tragic one, and would indeed solve the other problem as well. Tell them that we would teach them superior battle tactics, and transform them into an efficient fighting force that will attack with devastating power, so that when we direct them into battle, they will overcome any foe. And perhaps hint that the fewer of them left at the end, the fewer people they will have to share the treasure between. But that may not be a good idea."</p><p></p><p>Kai shrugs noddingly and/or nods shruggingly. "Okay," she says, turning to the bugbear and translating this idea into goblin.</p><p></p><p>Thulk's brutish face softens, apparently taken in somewhat by Kai's natural charisma. After a brief exchange, Kai turns back to the group and reports, "He's not buying the whole 'turn them into a potent fighting force' idea, but he is surprisingly willing to work with us. This is likely a combination of his understanding that we have killed many drow, and his ignorance about what fills the rest of the outpost. I think we could get them to accompany us to the inverted tower for about a quarter of found treasure, if we wanted. I don't think he'll go much lower for fear of losing face. And the giants might be problems."</p><p></p><p>Trella says something decidedly Quid-like. "Tell them we could throw in discretionary bonuses for particularly impressive acts. We could also have them keep track of drow casualties and for every five verified kills add 0.5% to the monetary treasure dividends for the mighty giants or whatever." She shrugs.</p><p></p><p>Kai passes this along, altering the wording slightly so as to be more easily understood. She turns back to the group after a brief discussion with Thulk, saying, "Okay, they've agreed to a quarter of all treasure found, with bonuses to Thulk and the giants depending on the number of drow killed. Now they want to receive all that training we promised before we take them down to the inverted tower."</p><p></p><p>Kyree volunteers to teach them archery. Upon noting their lack of bows, the ranger contents himself with showing them what they're missing out on with a brilliant display of skill.</p><p></p><p>Quid shrugs a “don't look at me” shrug. "Damn it, I'm a doctor not a drill sergeant. I make the offers for other people to do the work. Dobi would have loved to do the training, a self stylized Marquis de Lafayette, dilettante general…ah well.” She trails off.</p><p></p><p>After a moment of thought, Quid continues, “How about equipping them with random and cheap gear from the dead drow? Of course, we’ll take that out of their cut, plus interest. One of you martial types could arrange them into squads of eight or so, each squad surrounding one target, run them through some small formation tactics, teach 'em to bull rush and grapple especially if regular attacks aren't penetrating, to hold their attacks to disrupt spell casters, to initiate attacks by a charge, and to stay spread out to avoid area effect spells.”</p><p></p><p>This penetrates Calla’s studied insanity. “You’ve got to be kidding.” The diminutive rogue pulls a disturbing length of cracked drow femur from a pocket and begins to whittle it as she wanders off.</p><p></p><p>Khail points at the bag of holding that Quid now carries and says, “There aren’t any cheap weapons in there. I for one am not comfortable with giving them masterwork or enchanted weaponry and armor. They are evil, and will revert to their base nature. We’d be better off tying them all to trees and leaving food for them to eat.”</p><p></p><p>Quid sighs and throws up her hands. “Whatever. You’re the muscle.”</p><p></p><p>Trella takes the bugbears and the giants to one side, expecting others to teach the goblins. She demonstrates simple quarterstaff and sling techniques as she assumes that finding sticks, stones, and slings suitable to arm and equip this misfit bunch would not be impossible. Though obtaining these implements proves more difficult than she imagined, the druid is not wrong, and ably fabricates rough weapons out of some of the tougher mushrooms and assorted farming detritus. This takes nearly two hours, a time matched by the length of the training that Trella provides after the weapons are crafted. Eventually she ends her instruction—more out of annoyance than any real sense that progress has been made—and reconvenes mini-camp with the goblins.</p><p></p><p>The smaller goblinoids, now armed with rocks in a vain attempt to emulate Kyree, join their smelly selves to the larger stench. Trella moves upwind, and encourages the rest of the party to do likewise. She doesn’t have to make the suggestion twice.</p><p></p><p>**********************************</p><p></p><p>“My nose feels assaulted,” Calla comments, “they smell worse than drow turd.”</p><p></p><p>Quid moves to respond but wisely thinks better of it.</p><p></p><p>“We’re just lucky that they bought our reasoning for their going first. I wasn’t keen about allowing them behind us,” Kai interjects.</p><p></p><p>Trella shushes the trio. “There are problems with going first as well. Look.” She gestures towards an octagonal room formed from walls of smooth, black rock that is presently packed with panicking goblins enmeshed in webbing. “It seems they were ready for us.”</p><p></p><p>Khail advances boldly. “I’ll handle this,” he proclaims while striding into the passage, putting him in position to see the two drow—spitting images of Raphael—who step out into the opposing archway to view the commotion. The paladin’s presence offers a different interpretation to those about to label this a surprising slave revolt, and they react accordingly.</p><p></p><p>As the rest of the group forces its way into the press of bodies, a new drow suddenly appears, floating effortlessly over the goblins. Rakishly handsome in his half-opened purple shirt that billows in the swirling air currents, he takes in those present with a keen eye. Apparently deciding that the disturbance is of little consequence, he brushes a loose white hair back behind a fine gold headband and straightens his black cloak cavalierly before addressing those assembled.</p><p></p><p>“Now, now, let’s not be hasty here. While you could undoubtedly slay my guards, should you choose to engage me you will meet an untimely end. If I, Solom Ned’razak, archmage of Szith Morcane for over two hundred years, can see fit not to exterminate you as the insects you are, surely you can stay your rash hands for a moment. It may mean your lives.”</p><p></p><p>Idly playing with a single gold hoop in his left ear, the mighty mage waits for a response.</p></blockquote><p></p>
[QUOTE="htetickrt, post: 1648931, member: 16534"] Sorry for the long delay between posts; I had an accident with a Cutco knife while cutting bread and had a bit of trouble typing for a bit. Stupid unnecessarily sharp knife. Anyway, this one is short, but I hope it provides an amusing insight into the group's dynamics. Certainly they amused me. [CENTER]Entrance to the Inverted Tower[/CENTER] While the druid fumes and heroically attempts to stifle a retort, Quid steps to the fore, unable to resist the lure of any potential barter, even with a bugbear slave. "Well met, tall friend,” she says, addressing a stone giant with a nasty welt under his eye. “An alliance does seem like it would be of mutual advantage. We have heard of your immense prowess in helping take this city. But, how are we to trust you who were recently our enemy? What are your plans for after the city is taken, and how do you want to divide the spoils?" The giants, confused by the attention, defer to the bugbear who earlier addressed the group. There is a very long pause as he tries to digest Quid’s words. Eventually he says, "Yes. We very powerful. Take city. Kill, uh, kill many drow. Your enemy. Now we kill rest." Rhien coughs and gently nudges Quid. He whispers, "They didn't help take the city. It was the other one, deeper in the Underdark. Or rather a different group of creatures helped take that city. Maerimydra I believe it is called. These seem to be slaves, perhaps liberated by Trella's elementals." The bugbear apparently has sharp ears, and he snarls at the monk. "You know nothing. We no slaves. We strong, make drow do what we want. You need our help or you get killed, pale things. We get half of stuff; you get other half. Fair. We fight. Grrr! You fight. Phlump. We better. But we help. Ugh; you speak dumb. Make head hurt. Argh!" Quid rolls her eyes and turns away from the bugbear. “Let’s just attack the inverted tower. The wizards there are probably the toughest foe we’ll face, so we should do so at maximum strength. Unless that big gate Khail found leads somewhere promising.” “It leads to the Underdark,” Calla says with certainty. “We shouldn’t go down until we’ve killed every drow here. They’re sneaky buggers, and we shouldn’t leave any behind us.” Her eyes gleam eerily as she speaks. Kai shudders involuntarily. “Um, of course. I’m going to go speak with the bugbear now.” Her approach speaking in the humanoid’s native language of goblin is greeted with enthusiasm, and the two begin an animated discourse that only ends when Trella arrives and pokes Kai in the shoulder with her index finger. "Not to interrupt," the druid says, "but if you're done chatting with Hairy-head over there, would you mind letting us in on the details? More importantly, did my boys kick some bugbear ass?" Kai laughs and turns around to face Trella, switching to elven smoothly. "Sorry; the bugbear is a lot smarter than he seems. Not actually smart, but not an idiot either. His name is Thulk, and from what I gather he's the head of the slaves. Some of your elementals got to here and engaged the stone giants, of which there used to be three, before finally being defeated. These slaves were the beneficiaries of that. Ordinarily they'd have tried to kill us already, but it seems that twelve heavily armed adventurers who control huge elementals are scary enough to get them to talk. Thulk claims he can help us get rid of the rest of the drow if we split the spoils with him." Quid pokes her head in. “How about a language I can understand?” Thus begins a round of translation that amuses and confuses Thulk, and brings everyone up to speed. All except for Andy, that is, who knows only Common and so cannot be safely updated. This makes her sad, so she begins to sing. Cerridwin, feeling empathy, paws her crassly. Several people feel vaguely ill as a result. Kai shudders a second time. “I don't know about you guys, but for my part I doubt this gang will be helpful enough to pay off. Maybe we could send them in one direction while we go in another? Although in that case they'd be sure to send us the more dangerous way. Shall I tell them we don't need help and see what they offer?” She repeats her words several more times in different languages, and contemplates a new career in the foreign service. Quid maintains that “sixty ground troops and two giants should not be dismissed, especially if we use them properly. Ideally, we'd have a day, and I could alter my spells so that we could properly take them into battle. But we can use them as cannon fodder, and back them up like special forces, Afghanistan style. I imagine attacking the wizards to be a dangerous proposition, but we send them in for a frontal assault, and then supplement with our protection spells, ranged attacks, flight, and dispelling magics. The Maztican resisters were much easier to subjugate…er, I mean liberate, once we began pitting them against each other.” Calla starts. “Afwhat’s it whoosit?” The Waukeenar rubs the back of her neck. “Look, you guys didn't listen when I said it would be bad sleeping in the barracks, which is fine, but I think this opportunity is too great to waste. Acquisitions 5:13: Why fight a war when you can get someone else to do it for you?” Rhien looks distressed by this and turns to Quid. “There are only forty of them, and I can’t say I like outfitting them to die. I’ll have no part of this. When you’re ready to move on, I’ll be watching the chasm.” The monk walks off. Kai raises her hands defensively. "Whoa, I didn't think it was [I]good[/I] to sleep in the barracks, but as I said at the time, I thought they would attack us no matter where we went unless we teleported far away, and I didn't want to waste the spells teleporting back the next day. Steve's really heavy. Plus, now we've gotten some of their powerful people out of the way, rather than having to attack them in well-defended positions. But anyway, regarding our potential allies here, I agree that extra hands are always helpful. I'm just raising the question of whether their help is worth the price they're asking. You'd know the answer to that question better than I do, Quid, so you can decide and I'll pass the word along accordingly." "I'm sorry, dear Kai," quickly replies Quid, "I had not meant to impugn your judgment. I do suppose except for dear Dobi, (may his soul nap in peace)," Quid makes a brief sacred gesture, "things did work out rather well last night. "In terms of sharing the booty, if you put it that way, that's another story. Sending them off to attack on their own would have the same problem though. Perhaps they can accept other terms, such as one quarter of the gold, and half of the items, but we choose which items. They perhaps need us more than we need them, thus we should press our bargaining advantage. I am also worried about where they go afterward. Replacing rampaging drow with rampaging bugbears and giants is not necessarily the ideal resolution to this mess." Kai turns to the bugbear to propose this split. He looks shifty before finally replying with a question of his own, dutifully relayed back to the group by Kai. "He wants to know what they would have to do. I don't think they'll really go for it if we tell them straight out that we want them to go first. Though that would certainly settle the question of what most of them would do afterward." Quid nods. "Yup, well, that was also always part of my calculations. While I have a deep respect for all of Toril's creatures, the loss of a few goblins and bugbears would not be a tragic one, and would indeed solve the other problem as well. Tell them that we would teach them superior battle tactics, and transform them into an efficient fighting force that will attack with devastating power, so that when we direct them into battle, they will overcome any foe. And perhaps hint that the fewer of them left at the end, the fewer people they will have to share the treasure between. But that may not be a good idea." Kai shrugs noddingly and/or nods shruggingly. "Okay," she says, turning to the bugbear and translating this idea into goblin. Thulk's brutish face softens, apparently taken in somewhat by Kai's natural charisma. After a brief exchange, Kai turns back to the group and reports, "He's not buying the whole 'turn them into a potent fighting force' idea, but he is surprisingly willing to work with us. This is likely a combination of his understanding that we have killed many drow, and his ignorance about what fills the rest of the outpost. I think we could get them to accompany us to the inverted tower for about a quarter of found treasure, if we wanted. I don't think he'll go much lower for fear of losing face. And the giants might be problems." Trella says something decidedly Quid-like. "Tell them we could throw in discretionary bonuses for particularly impressive acts. We could also have them keep track of drow casualties and for every five verified kills add 0.5% to the monetary treasure dividends for the mighty giants or whatever." She shrugs. Kai passes this along, altering the wording slightly so as to be more easily understood. She turns back to the group after a brief discussion with Thulk, saying, "Okay, they've agreed to a quarter of all treasure found, with bonuses to Thulk and the giants depending on the number of drow killed. Now they want to receive all that training we promised before we take them down to the inverted tower." Kyree volunteers to teach them archery. Upon noting their lack of bows, the ranger contents himself with showing them what they're missing out on with a brilliant display of skill. Quid shrugs a “don't look at me” shrug. "Damn it, I'm a doctor not a drill sergeant. I make the offers for other people to do the work. Dobi would have loved to do the training, a self stylized Marquis de Lafayette, dilettante general…ah well.” She trails off. After a moment of thought, Quid continues, “How about equipping them with random and cheap gear from the dead drow? Of course, we’ll take that out of their cut, plus interest. One of you martial types could arrange them into squads of eight or so, each squad surrounding one target, run them through some small formation tactics, teach 'em to bull rush and grapple especially if regular attacks aren't penetrating, to hold their attacks to disrupt spell casters, to initiate attacks by a charge, and to stay spread out to avoid area effect spells.” This penetrates Calla’s studied insanity. “You’ve got to be kidding.” The diminutive rogue pulls a disturbing length of cracked drow femur from a pocket and begins to whittle it as she wanders off. Khail points at the bag of holding that Quid now carries and says, “There aren’t any cheap weapons in there. I for one am not comfortable with giving them masterwork or enchanted weaponry and armor. They are evil, and will revert to their base nature. We’d be better off tying them all to trees and leaving food for them to eat.” Quid sighs and throws up her hands. “Whatever. You’re the muscle.” Trella takes the bugbears and the giants to one side, expecting others to teach the goblins. She demonstrates simple quarterstaff and sling techniques as she assumes that finding sticks, stones, and slings suitable to arm and equip this misfit bunch would not be impossible. Though obtaining these implements proves more difficult than she imagined, the druid is not wrong, and ably fabricates rough weapons out of some of the tougher mushrooms and assorted farming detritus. This takes nearly two hours, a time matched by the length of the training that Trella provides after the weapons are crafted. Eventually she ends her instruction—more out of annoyance than any real sense that progress has been made—and reconvenes mini-camp with the goblins. The smaller goblinoids, now armed with rocks in a vain attempt to emulate Kyree, join their smelly selves to the larger stench. Trella moves upwind, and encourages the rest of the party to do likewise. She doesn’t have to make the suggestion twice. ********************************** “My nose feels assaulted,” Calla comments, “they smell worse than drow turd.” Quid moves to respond but wisely thinks better of it. “We’re just lucky that they bought our reasoning for their going first. I wasn’t keen about allowing them behind us,” Kai interjects. Trella shushes the trio. “There are problems with going first as well. Look.” She gestures towards an octagonal room formed from walls of smooth, black rock that is presently packed with panicking goblins enmeshed in webbing. “It seems they were ready for us.” Khail advances boldly. “I’ll handle this,” he proclaims while striding into the passage, putting him in position to see the two drow—spitting images of Raphael—who step out into the opposing archway to view the commotion. The paladin’s presence offers a different interpretation to those about to label this a surprising slave revolt, and they react accordingly. As the rest of the group forces its way into the press of bodies, a new drow suddenly appears, floating effortlessly over the goblins. Rakishly handsome in his half-opened purple shirt that billows in the swirling air currents, he takes in those present with a keen eye. Apparently deciding that the disturbance is of little consequence, he brushes a loose white hair back behind a fine gold headband and straightens his black cloak cavalierly before addressing those assembled. “Now, now, let’s not be hasty here. While you could undoubtedly slay my guards, should you choose to engage me you will meet an untimely end. If I, Solom Ned’razak, archmage of Szith Morcane for over two hundred years, can see fit not to exterminate you as the insects you are, surely you can stay your rash hands for a moment. It may mean your lives.” Idly playing with a single gold hoop in his left ear, the mighty mage waits for a response. [/QUOTE]
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